this post was submitted on 03 Feb 2026
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Don't be mean. I promise to do my best to judge that fairly.

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[–] STUNT_GRANNY@lemmy.world 123 points 3 days ago (6 children)

The secret is that you have to throw yourself at the ground and miss.

[–] WhyIHateTheInternet@lemmy.world 72 points 3 days ago (2 children)

I remember reading that for the first time at 13 and thinking it was the smartest fucking thing I had ever read. It makes perfect sense too. Sadly my aim is impeccable.

[–] tetris11@feddit.uk 2 points 1 day ago

According to catholics, that's how sex works too. Too bad they're all sharpshooters...

[–] Quetzalcutlass@lemmy.world 72 points 3 days ago (1 children)

It's basically how orbiting works in a roundabout way. You just needed to go faster!

[–] foofiepie@lemmy.world 42 points 3 days ago* (last edited 3 days ago)

in a roundabout way

Very good.

[–] FordBeeblebrox@lemmy.world 11 points 2 days ago

I tried hiring myself out as a distraction for people just before they hit the ground but the air horn and firecrackers aren’t working, maybe I just don’t have the legs for it

[–] derry@midwest.social 18 points 2 days ago (1 children)

Tell that to a whale or bowl of petunias that suddenly materialized in the atmosphere of a planet with gravity

[–] FjordDan@lemmy.zip 9 points 2 days ago (1 children)

I almost upvoted you, then I realized you had 42 upvotes.

[–] ClockworkOtter@lemmy.world 5 points 2 days ago

Now they're over, it might be time to downvote

If only Andrew Tate had the balls to recreate it irl