this post was submitted on 13 Feb 2026
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Putting aside all the late stage capitalism going on here, I still can't get over the fact that Alphabet (Google) spent billions of dollars developing self driving car technology only to arrive at, "Oh shit. Someone left the car door open. What do we do now?"
Giving them the ability to close their own doors just screams "kid's arm smashed in automatic car door failure".
I used to have a Tesla (traded it in). In the app you could open, but not close, the windows. It could be inconvenient at times but I assume the reasoning was similar.
That’s weird. Most of the cars I have had can open and close the windows from the fob. (Usually double press then hold unlock or lock, though one car I had [Accord] required the key in the door for the windows to go up.)
Right - I think the difference is that, when using a fob, you're likely within line of sight or at least nearby your car and so presumably could observe or otherwise check for car occupants, but so long as your car and phone both have reception you can use the app from anywhere without any clue who might be in or around the car.
New cars have automatic window up functions but strictly dont apply enough pressure to choke a child
Mine goes up automatically and if it encounters resistance, it goes back down again. I guess this is too hard for Tesla.
IIRC people were testing cybertrucks for some auto-closing functionality, and if they encountered resistance, they would back off... Then try harder, slicing through hotdogs
I saw carrots being sheared like nothing from the cybertruck.
Still hurts like hell though... from someone who once accidentally rolled up the window BEFORE pulling my head in. :-D
Just make the motor not slam the door but close it slowly with not enough force to harm someone and put like two sensors + 1 backup in there
Call me a cynical luddite but somehow I don't trust today's autonomous car technology to be reliable and fool-proof enough for that mechanism not to fail catastrophically and randomly because it's raining or someone on the other side of the street made a sudden movement or Mercury is in retrograde or the company's stock market just dropped 592 points because investors are furious after realising they wasted money on a backup or it's Tuesday.
You know we already have autonomous doors for houses. I feel like theres a lot more trust involved having a 2 ton vehicle move significant speeds on the road than having it close a door
I do not know that. I'd also assume the technology to close a door on a car to work very differently from that on a house because a door on a house that may not be closed properly is far less dangerous than one on a car. Also, yes, I don't trust that 2 ton vehicle either if it claims to be autonomous.
Behold the miracle of the slipping clutch, millenials. See It working without being digital and all without an app by the ancient secrets of mechanics!
Perfect argument that they are too immature to be on the road.
I'm sorry, are you saying children are too immature to be passengers in cars?
I don't get what you are saying. My kids' door locks aren't even on. You know what they can manage? Closing the door.
But they built in a saw blade killswitch if a finger is detected a good decade ago or more. Surely they can apply such technology to cars.
It hasn't yet been used without people around who can stop the process if it goes wrong.
And yet things like robovaccums have. The sawblade has to detect the right material. Meanwhile Robot vaccums just have to detect anything in its path to then stop. And it has a bumper. And ring cameras can detect motion. As well as dashboard cameras. Dont see why any of this technology cannot be used in car doors just to detect anything in it’s path.
I'm not saying it's forever impossible, I'm saying I currently don't trust these technologies to operate autonomously in a context where lives are at potential risk and they'll need to prove beyond the shadow of a doubt that they can do so reliably before I start trusting.
The sawstop causes mechanical damage that must be repaired if activated. It's more like an airbag than an e-stop.
This shows you just how strong our culture is an influence here. You can leave a door open and cause enough trouble that they need to hire someone else to go manually shut it. I’m willing to bet there are a lot of seemingly innocuous ways to cause friction with these companies. The more people know and exploit them, the better.
the revolution IS YOU
Supposedly a salt circle drawn like "no entry" road markings can trap them.
That was the coning of waymo cars. It was their version of a salt circle.
And, as a bonus, any ghosts or demons therein!
At first I think you were jokingly referring to them as demons. Now I realize you’re actually serious…
Well, daemons, but still...
Supposedly putting a cheapo luggage lock on a door latch requires a coordinated effort involving a locksmith or a tow truck
Even if this thing was left on a single city block for 8 hours with its door open, the data it collects about nearby cars, Bluetooth devices, phones, WiFi SSIDs, recorded video/audio, etc. makes it worth it for alphabet, I imagine.
When I was a kid my dad would drive forward and slam the brakes to close our van door.
It was really fun until that became the only way that closed the door.