1214
Like clockwork (i.imgur.com)
all 43 comments
sorted by: hot top controversial new old
[-] ramenshaman@lemmy.world 46 points 1 year ago
[-] ButtholeSpiders@startrek.website 13 points 1 year ago

It felt appropriate to stay on theme here.

[-] Shady_Shiroe@lemm.ee 30 points 1 year ago

I would say 45 minutes of scrolling if lemmy.world wasn't constantly under DDOS attacks

[-] TheGoldenGod@lemmy.world 14 points 1 year ago

So true… 😣 It’s like they think it’s the main server for the entire thing.

[-] raltoid@lemmy.world 26 points 1 year ago

I was shocked when I found out how common external/bleeding hemorrhoids can be(Almost 3/4 adults will have them from time to time).

Then it all clicked when I realized people sit on the toilet for 15min+, which is a major contributor to that condition.

[-] ButtholeSpiders@startrek.website 13 points 1 year ago

When I get hemorrhoids, it’s not from sitting for long periods. It’s due to my need for a poop bat’leth. I take Klingon sized poops.

[-] Agent641@lemmy.world 3 points 1 year ago

Correct, these are most certainly, POOPS. I have Toto toilets that I bought to ensure I can flush without fear of it’s returning from Sto-vo-kor.

[-] FlyingSquid@lemmy.world 5 points 1 year ago

My wife can sit on the toilet for 45 minutes. I don't get it. I want to get on and off that thing as quickly as possible. Why do you want to hover over poo?

[-] Agent641@lemmy.world 7 points 1 year ago

Not all of us have a bowel that is cooperative and timely. For some of us it is always a pitched battle of wills, a violent class struggle.

[-] danny@sh.itjust.works 5 points 1 year ago

Because it doesn’t all happen at once

[-] FlyingSquid@lemmy.world 1 points 1 year ago

Yeah, but 45 minutes? Take a break and come back or something.

[-] akippnn@lemmy.world 3 points 1 year ago

I'd say it's more of a revelation to me that sitting on the toilet seat itself for long periods causes hemorrhoids, than hemorrhoids being common in general.

I've been there for an hour a couple of times, I've never had it so I would never notice lol. I guess it's time to avoid it altogether.

[-] norawibb@sh.itjust.works 2 points 1 year ago
[-] Faustus@feddit.ch 12 points 1 year ago
[-] RagingRobot@lemmy.world 4 points 1 year ago

Do your legs ever fall asleep

[-] Faustus@feddit.ch 11 points 1 year ago

Nope. Years of experience hiding in the bathroom from my kids.

[-] RadicalCandour@startrek.website 2 points 1 year ago

A squatty potty really helps in the department of prolonged toilet sitting.

[-] HeyThisIsntTheYMCA@lemmy.world 11 points 1 year ago

You know a courtesy flush will take care of the aroma.

[-] ButtholeSpiders@startrek.website 6 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago)

But then how will other Klingons smell what I’m cooking?

[-] RedditWanderer@lemmy.world 9 points 1 year ago

Now do your leg that has long fell asleep

[-] ButtholeSpiders@startrek.website 2 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago)

A Klingon doesn’t skip leg day’s.

[-] hungryphrog@lemmy.blahaj.zone 8 points 1 year ago

You're supposed to hold it for 3 days, not 15 minutes!

But, that’s how they become pine cone shaped.

[-] Justly0250@lemdro.id 2 points 1 year ago

Rookie numbers.

[-] thegreatgarbo@lemmy.world 7 points 1 year ago

Thank you for a legit belly laugh.

[-] danny@sh.itjust.works 5 points 1 year ago

Me rn (or my poop more accurately)

[-] mojo@lemm.ee 5 points 1 year ago

this made me laugh way too much lmao

[-] FlyingSquid@lemmy.world 5 points 1 year ago

Sadly, that's work for me. "You can go to the bathroom, but you have to finish these three orders first." Thanks, brain. Fuck you.

[-] solstice@lemmy.world 4 points 1 year ago

COURTESY FLUSH

There, said it loud and clear so everyone can hear. Doom scroll all you want but give it a flush first please, no need to stink up the bathroom with your nasty shit stew marinating the whole time. I don't understand why people don't know this.

[-] victron@programming.dev 1 points 1 year ago

Thank you for giving it a name, fellow courtesy flusher.

[-] lord_ryvan@ttrpg.network 4 points 1 year ago

Or you could stay, there’s no shame friend.

[-] fne8w2ah@lemmy.world 1 points 1 year ago

That reminds me of the early days of R*ddit.

this post was submitted on 12 Aug 2023
1214 points (98.0% liked)

Lemmy Shitpost

26972 readers
3575 users here now

Welcome to Lemmy Shitpost. Here you can shitpost to your hearts content.

Anything and everything goes. Memes, Jokes, Vents and Banter. Though we still have to comply with lemmy.world instance rules. So behave!


Rules:

1. Be Respectful


Refrain from using harmful language pertaining to a protected characteristic: e.g. race, gender, sexuality, disability or religion.

Refrain from being argumentative when responding or commenting to posts/replies. Personal attacks are not welcome here.

...


2. No Illegal Content


Content that violates the law. Any post/comment found to be in breach of common law will be removed and given to the authorities if required.

That means:

-No promoting violence/threats against any individuals

-No CSA content or Revenge Porn

-No sharing private/personal information (Doxxing)

...


3. No Spam


Posting the same post, no matter the intent is against the rules.

-If you have posted content, please refrain from re-posting said content within this community.

-Do not spam posts with intent to harass, annoy, bully, advertise, scam or harm this community.

-No posting Scams/Advertisements/Phishing Links/IP Grabbers

-No Bots, Bots will be banned from the community.

...


4. No Porn/ExplicitContent


-Do not post explicit content. Lemmy.World is not the instance for NSFW content.

-Do not post Gore or Shock Content.

...


5. No Enciting Harassment,Brigading, Doxxing or Witch Hunts


-Do not Brigade other Communities

-No calls to action against other communities/users within Lemmy or outside of Lemmy.

-No Witch Hunts against users/communities.

-No content that harasses members within or outside of the community.

...


6. NSFW should be behind NSFW tags.


-Content that is NSFW should be behind NSFW tags.

-Content that might be distressing should be kept behind NSFW tags.

...

If you see content that is a breach of the rules, please flag and report the comment and a moderator will take action where they can.


Also check out:

Partnered Communities:

1.Memes

2.Lemmy Review

3.Mildly Infuriating

4.Lemmy Be Wholesome

5.No Stupid Questions

6.You Should Know

7.Comedy Heaven

8.Credible Defense

9.Ten Forward

10.LinuxMemes (Linux themed memes)


Reach out to

All communities included on the sidebar are to be made in compliance with the instance rules. Striker

founded 1 year ago
MODERATORS