this post was submitted on 21 Mar 2025
649 points (98.4% liked)

Not The Onion

15287 readers
1051 users here now

Welcome

We're not The Onion! Not affiliated with them in any way! Not operated by them in any way! All the news here is real!

The Rules

Posts must be:

  1. Links to news stories from...
  2. ...credible sources, with...
  3. ...their original headlines, that...
  4. ...would make people who see the headline think, “That has got to be a story from The Onion, America’s Finest News Source.”

Please also avoid duplicates.

Comments and post content must abide by the server rules for Lemmy.world and generally abstain from trollish, bigoted, or otherwise disruptive behavior that makes this community less fun for everyone.

And that’s basically it!

founded 2 years ago
MODERATORS
top 38 comments
sorted by: hot top controversial new old
[–] celeste@kbin.earth 193 points 2 days ago (1 children)

Speaking about the mine, Errol told Musk biographer Walter Isaacson: “If you registered it, you would wind up with nothing, because the Blacks would take everything from you.”

Hmm...exactly the guy to prove someone isn't racist.

[–] kernelle@0d.gs 49 points 2 days ago (1 children)

Maybe he meant Elon wasn't racist enough in his opinion?

[–] celeste@kbin.earth 8 points 2 days ago

Elon probably seems remarkably egalitarian compared to him, even now.

[–] klu9@lemmy.ca 43 points 2 days ago

I thought I was so original posting this yesterday:

Elon “I can’t possibly be a racist troll, some of my best serfs are Negroes!” Musk.

Turns out his own father beat me to it!

[–] ShinkanTrain@lemmy.ml 81 points 2 days ago (1 children)

I'm not racist, my favorite slaves are black

[–] InternetCitizen2@lemmy.world 6 points 2 days ago* (last edited 2 days ago)

Nothing racist about that. Just libertarian, but please call them free bounded employees ^/s^

[–] hendrik@palaver.p3x.de 103 points 2 days ago (2 children)

Classic. Can't be racist, cause he once met a black dude...

[–] ThunderWhiskers@lemmy.world 69 points 2 days ago

That his father effectively owned.

[–] Chozo@fedia.io 26 points 2 days ago (1 children)

Reminds me of that dude whose argument was "Do you know how expensive a slave was back then?!" lmao

I remember the fat fuck and his abject lack of self-awareness.

[–] gonzo-rand19@moist.catsweat.com 95 points 2 days ago (1 children)

"He's not racist, it's just that I taught him that he was superior to every black person that he ever met as a child." Fucking hell.

Him and everything in his society.

[–] mimavox@lemm.ee 81 points 2 days ago (1 children)

This is beyond parody at this point.

[–] fossilesque@lemmy.dbzer0.com 28 points 2 days ago (1 children)

Makes Cheryl Tunt look more realistic than this family.

[–] rikudou@lemmings.world 8 points 2 days ago (1 children)

Hey, Cheryl/Charlene/Cristal/whatever was awesome!

[–] Sonicdemon86@lemmy.world 5 points 2 days ago

You're not my manager!

[–] Empricorn@feddit.nl 62 points 2 days ago

He paid black people to be nice to Musk as a child... and that's his defense!?

[–] Jayve@lemmy.world 51 points 2 days ago

"Servants".

[–] blattrules@lemmy.world 35 points 2 days ago

I read the headline and was absolutely positive that it was an onion article, then saw where this was posted.

[–] Sibshops@lemm.ee 44 points 2 days ago* (last edited 2 days ago) (1 children)

He's just rreeeaalllyy into white people breeding.

[–] LaserTurboShark69@sh.itjust.works 8 points 2 days ago (1 children)
[–] Sibshops@lemm.ee 2 points 2 days ago

Oh yeah, true. I'll remove it.

[–] TachyonTele@lemm.ee 32 points 2 days ago (1 children)

This is the same guy that married his step daughter.

[–] thisbenzingring 41 points 2 days ago (1 children)

Not married but....

He has two children with her mother

and he has two children with her

[–] TachyonTele@lemm.ee 14 points 2 days ago (1 children)
[–] klu9@lemmy.ca 8 points 2 days ago

In the early 1990s, Errol, then aged 45, married Heide Bezuidenhout, a 25-year old he described as "one of the best looking women I've ever seen in my life". They had two children. Jana Bezuidenhout, who was his stepdaughter from that marriage, and four years old at the time Errol became her stepfather, later became his romantic partner.

[–] ceenote@lemmy.world 21 points 2 days ago* (last edited 2 days ago)

How dumb do you have to be to mess up the "I have a black friend" defense?

[–] Yawweee877h444@lemmy.world 21 points 2 days ago

Yowza.

Just shows how disconnected from reality these people are. They live in a bubble of luxury, affluence, yes-men. They've never experienced any semblance of hardship or struggle, ever. He grew up with servants for fucks sake.

[–] ObviouslyNotBanana@lemmy.world 16 points 2 days ago* (last edited 2 days ago)

Look, I think my opinion on Elon is obvious, but "my son made friends with people whose best interest was to be friendly towards him and not mouth off" is not a good argument lmao

[–] Elkot@lemmy.world 10 points 2 days ago* (last edited 2 days ago) (1 children)

My family is originally from Rhodesia, I was shocked when my father told me he had servants growing up

[–] stoly@lemmy.world 2 points 2 days ago

It’s very common outside of Europe and North America. You don’t need to be wealthy when so many are super poor.

[–] Tylerdurdon@lemmy.world 10 points 2 days ago

It's the "I have black friends" defense but with servants. What's next? "The people he had locked up were his best chums so he's still not racist?"

[–] JoeTheSane@lemmy.world 3 points 2 days ago
[–] Infynis@midwest.social 6 points 2 days ago

This one really should have been the Onion

[–] Bezier@suppo.fi 6 points 2 days ago

You can't make this shit up

[–] tfm@europe.pub 7 points 2 days ago* (last edited 2 days ago)
[–] thesohoriots@lemmy.world 5 points 2 days ago

“His best friend was a black guy named Early! Because he was never late.”

[–] Blackmist@feddit.uk 1 points 2 days ago