this post was submitted on 24 Dec 2025
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Leopards Ate My Face

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DES MOINES, IA — Jessica Djukanovic, a conservative wrestling coach, mother of four, and loyal voter for the “Traditional Values and Strict Legislation Party,” is reportedly “shocked and appalled” to discover that the very laws she helped implement are currently treating her life as a secondary concern to a non-viable fetus.

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[–] echodot@feddit.uk 36 points 2 hours ago (2 children)

“I wasn’t allowed to choose me? Where’s the pro-life in that?”

That is literally what they voted for. They actually voted for the mother not to be allowed to have a choice in the matter.

This is what single digit IQ looks like folks.

[–] apftwb@lemmy.world 7 points 1 hour ago

“I wasn’t allowed to choose me? Where’s the pro-life in that?”

Her community, her family, her school, her state, and our shared society failed this woman. That is some bottom tier comprehension and critical thinking that has to cultivated by basically everyone in her life.

[–] Lightsong@lemmy.world 4 points 1 hour ago

Took me a few tries to get past the fact it wasn't a satire.

[–] hanrahan@piefed.social 4 points 1 hour ago
[–] Rentlar@lemmy.ca 5 points 1 hour ago (1 children)

“I wasn’t allowed to choose me? Where’s the pro-life in that?”

That's literally pro-choice, dawg. "Pro-life" is literally pro-birth even for a non-viable fetus at your own expense.

[–] BradleyUffner@lemmy.world 2 points 59 minutes ago* (last edited 49 minutes ago) (1 children)

Pro-life isn't pro-birth, it's forced-birth. It's "I will strap you down to a table against your will and watch you die, if I have to, to make sure it happens."

[–] uncouple9831@lemmy.zip 2 points 25 minutes ago* (last edited 24 minutes ago)

Not even death can save you from me

-Diablo, Diablo2; the republican party

[–] Treczoks@lemmy.world 21 points 3 hours ago

Thoughts and prayers:

  • Thought: I think she is quite stupid.

  • Prayer: May she suffer from her life choices, and then rot in hell.

[–] 6stringringer@lemmy.zip 4 points 2 hours ago

And a one and a two and a three and a four. And a two in the thoughts and a one in the prayers.

[–] RampantParanoia2365@lemmy.world 16 points 5 hours ago

What a cunt.

[–] Formfiller@lemmy.world 20 points 7 hours ago

She’s getting what she voted for. It’s a Christmas miracle. I’m happy for her

[–] Deconceptualist@leminal.space 19 points 7 hours ago* (last edited 7 hours ago) (1 children)

Haha. Michele Stills might suddenly be my new favorite editorialist. This was quite an amusing and incisive read.

Don't get me wrong, my heart goes out to these folks (despite their obstinate stupidity) because no one should have to suffer the trauma and anguish they've gone through. But assuming the coverage is accurate, they've 100% supported the abuse all along, and that's pretty fucked up.

EDIT: Also I don't see the supposed censorship people are claiming. The victim here was quoted as saying "I almost died" and it also includes the word "dying" so it seems fine to me. But I load this shit in Firefox Focus with an ad-blocking VPN so YMMV.

[–] grue@lemmy.world 14 points 7 hours ago* (last edited 7 hours ago)

EDIT: Also I don't see the supposed censorship people are claiming.

The headline says "d!ed." With an exclamation point instead of an i.

[–] MehBlah@lemmy.world 32 points 8 hours ago (2 children)

In truth that jackass probably had no idea what any of it meant until it applied to her.

[–] echodot@feddit.uk 10 points 2 hours ago* (last edited 2 hours ago)

This is the problem with these people. This won't lead to some epiphany because they still refuse to accept that they actually voted for this.

She didn't actually bother to read any of the flyers and just came up with her own interpretation of what was being promised. Then voted for that imagined reality.

[–] Rakonat@lemmy.world 28 points 8 hours ago

Every conservative voter ever. And to make matters worse, they'd probably say there should be an exception for them but other women in an identical condition should have to risk death.

Critical thinking and empathy are both foreign concepts to them.

[–] SnarkoPolo@lemmy.world 15 points 9 hours ago (1 children)

"Welcome to Chez Leopard. For your culinary delight, Chef has prepared a filet of MAGA face, reverse seared in a Medoc sauce Bordelaise. Bon Appétit!"

[–] Tollana1234567@lemmy.today 1 points 6 hours ago

served on a platter of pheasant on the glass, with chardonny

[–] Iheartcheese@lemmy.world 47 points 11 hours ago (1 children)

What kind of shitty ass news website censors the word died? Shit needs to be blacklisted.

[–] I_Fart_Glitter@lemmy.world 24 points 10 hours ago

It seems to be basically a blog, run by one woman who calls herself an "independent journalist."

The "article" has gems like this:

For years, Djukanovic proudly stood with the Leopard Party, cheering on their platform of “protecting the unborn” and “getting the government out of our lives” (while simultaneously putting the government into everyone’s doctors’ offices). However, the celebratory mood shifted last month when a Leopard walked into her own living room and began sizing up her forehead.

[–] Chronographs@lemmy.zip 63 points 12 hours ago (1 children)

So cool we have headlines censoring died now. Though some random Iowa lady getting the care she voted for isn’t exactly news I suppose

[–] Steve@startrek.website 15 points 10 hours ago

Engagement bait

[–] mfed1122@discuss.tchncs.de 17 points 12 hours ago

Womp womp hope ya die

[–] lmmarsano@lemmynsfw.com 12 points 11 hours ago* (last edited 10 hours ago)

Conservatives sure love putting those "traditions" ahead of liberty until it fucks them over.

[–] breadsmasher@lemmy.world 14 points 12 hours ago (1 children)
[–] Tollana1234567@lemmy.today 2 points 6 hours ago

they went after the feotus too.

[–] SanctimoniousApe@lemmings.world 9 points 12 hours ago

Can somebody bump the record player? It's skipping again.