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submitted 8 months ago by toaster@slrpnk.net to c/memes@slrpnk.net
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[-] spudwart@spudwart.com 105 points 8 months ago

"I am driving a lifted DODGE RAM TRUCK"

"My lifted DODGE RAM TRUCK has BLINDING WHITE LED headlights positioned EXACTLY at EYE LEVEL. "

"I am currently TAILGATING you in the RIGHT LANE even though you’re going TWENTY MILES AN HOUR over the speed limit and the LEFT LANE is OPEN."

"There are MONSTER ENERGY and FOX RACING stickers on the rear windshield of my lifted DODGE RAM TRUCK."

"There are PERFECTLY CLEAN mud tires and MASSIVE CHROME RIMS on my lifted DODGE RAM TRUCK."

"I make THIRTY-ONE THOUSAND DOLLARS a year and thought that that was a WISE FINANCIAL DECISION."

"I bring cases of BUD LIGHT to girls at high school parties while my wife and children are at home."

"My lifted DODGE RAM TRUCK has a GUN RACK which holds the AR-15 that I bought at WAL-MART."

"YETI COOLERS kick ass!"

[-] Lionel@endlesstalk.org 11 points 8 months ago

This is fucking gold, could be a copypasta or new meme format.

[-] spudwart@spudwart.com 9 points 8 months ago

It’s a pre-existing copypasta.

[-] Lionel@endlesstalk.org 6 points 8 months ago

Damn. I thought you had birthed something magical right here.

[-] spudwart@spudwart.com 11 points 8 months ago

Come on now. Lemmy has its roots in Reddit.

Reposts are part of our religion.

[-] Lionel@endlesstalk.org 8 points 8 months ago

We need GENUINE copypastas made by REAL AMERICANS in AUTHENTIC FACTORIES with GENUINE INGREDIENTS not these flimsy REDDIT REPOSTS.

[-] spudwart@spudwart.com 6 points 8 months ago

Nothing more American than taking someone else’s idea and claiming it’s your own.

And if you think any other country is known for this, then mission accomplished.

[-] Hboc22@lemmy.world 11 points 8 months ago

I'm 100% white trash. I own a 90s model, 4 cylinder, 5 speed pickup truck that does everything I need it to. It isn't my daily driver because it's not a fashion accessory it's a goddamn pickup truck. The ass end being light if your bed is empty makes the things harder to handle in adverse weather. Not too mention I beat the fuck out of it, using a truck as truck doesn't leave it looking pretty. What I'm saying here, is that even down in the south where I'm at, a good chick of us think these people are dipshits too

Yeti Coolers are actually the shit though. Just never buy one from a store. Just find someone who drives one of these shiny lifted trucks and offer them a reasonable price for the one they paid full price for the next time they are freaking out about being behind on their truck payment. When you buy the cooler from them, if you want to make the world a better place, give them a box of condoms too. I'm being serious these dumbasses have the forethought of fucking goldfish. They tend to have litters and be completely surprised. The Yeti 160 that I own was bought for 40 bucks from a guy that made 12 dollars an hour, and had 5 kids (with a 6th on the way). Of all the stereotypes of these kind of people you listed I think you missed the one where they tend to fuck themselves into poverty.

Which is probably why I sound so mean about this. I don't care what someone spends there money on. If driving a lifted truck makes you happy, you do you as long as you can actually drive the thing without being a nuisance to others. But it's an entirely different story to watch a grown man spend so much money to play redneck cosplay while simultaneously pumping out kids left and right that they can't afford to give a decent life too. I'm sick of meeting people who drive these expensive cock replacements, wear overpriced fashionable camo everywhere, and blow any decent sum of money they luck into on weapons they don't even understand how to maintain, only to find out they have 6 kids and are renting a 2 bedroom trailer. So fucking frustrating to see.

[-] toaster@slrpnk.net 5 points 8 months ago

Proof that the real joke is in the comments 👆

[-] Default_Defect@midwest.social 2 points 8 months ago

Jesus Christ, this is almost my brother.

[-] franklin@lemmy.world 68 points 8 months ago* (last edited 8 months ago)

If you need headlights with more lumens than the sun to drive at night, you shouldn't be allowed to drive at night.

[-] JacobCoffinWrites@slrpnk.net 38 points 8 months ago

The temptation to mirror tint my rear windshield goes up every time I drive at night

[-] Neato@kbin.social 20 points 8 months ago

Your rearview mirror likely has a little tab on the bottom of it. Push it when there's The Entire Sun behind you. It'll dim the mirror's reflection without changing the angle.

If you have a newer, fancier car, you might have a digital version of that.

[-] JacobCoffinWrites@slrpnk.net 36 points 8 months ago* (last edited 8 months ago)

I use that thing a lot, but they usually drive close enough to get the side mirrors too, and generally light up the whole cab. So I spend however long they're behind me hunched forward to keep their brights out of my eyes, waiting for a passing zone. I'm not even a slow driver.

[-] drcobaltjedi@programming.dev 15 points 8 months ago

Yeah this is my problem too. I drive an accord and most of the time these fucks just drive as close as possible lighting up my whole car and now i can't fucking see so i slow down a lot to not be a danger

[-] Swedneck@discuss.tchncs.de 3 points 8 months ago

you'd probably save lives in the long run

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[-] PlatinumSf@pawb.social 14 points 8 months ago

More often than not you can blame the auto industry for this. People want to migrate to LED lights for longevity reasons but the industry has no interest in OEM support for models that have already been produced, especially in the realm of upgrading/mods, so you end up with people dropping in cheap ebay replacements that have been developed without any consideration to the concentration of the beam or the design of the lens. If there was some level of first party support even to just the bare minimum of "here's how you should do it and here's the components to buy" you'd see a lot less of these issues since it's likely not the brightness of the bulb that's the issue but the way the lenses and housing were designed. In addition LED lighting has become so cheap it should be the complete default for every model but instead OEMs have decided to use it as a bargaining chip for higher trim packages.

[-] jubilationtcornpone@sh.itjust.works 6 points 8 months ago* (last edited 8 months ago)

It's not just the cheap replacements. I had a brand new 2018 Toyota Rav4 and when I first bought it, I would get "flashed" constantly by people thinking my brights were on. They weren't. In fact, I almost never had to use the brights. It had very bright white LED's and at that point those style of headlamps were new and not many vehicles had them.

Now that GM, Ford, and a few others use similar bulbs, the "flashing" has mostly subsided. I think people have gotten used to them. I couldn't blame anyone for being frustrated. They were excessively bright. A lot of new headlights are and I think it's a problem. I'm happy about the better visibility but I don't want to blind the person coming at me in the other lane. That's not a good situation for either of us.

[-] Strykker@programming.dev 2 points 8 months ago

Might be worth getting the aim checked on the lights. They may have come poorly aimed out of the factory and are just pointed too high.

Then again half the problem is the big trucks and SUVs having their lights like 2-3 feet higher off the ground than a sedan does.

[-] time_fo_that@lemmy.world 11 points 8 months ago

So many people driving with their brights on in the city these days. It's infuriating.

[-] dditty@lemm.ee 5 points 8 months ago

Where I am it's the exact opposite, people driving in the city at night without their headlights on at all. I think the streetlights illuminate enough that they don't remember to turn them on.

[-] Bytemeister@lemmy.world 4 points 8 months ago

I blame the combination of automatic lights and DRLs. Accidentally move a switch that you never touch 1 position and you might not notice for months that you don't have your lights on.

This is why I don't use automatic lights. You are responsible for ensuring that your car is in a safe state to operate, which means knowing whether or not your lights are on. The only times you should use automatic is when you are going though an area with a lot of tunnels, and you don't want to have to toggle the switch every time, or, if you are driving during daylight, but you are expecting to continue into dusk or night. In those cases, move the switch to auto, so you know for sure that your lights are in auto mode but don't just set it and forget it.

[-] liztliss@lemmy.world 52 points 8 months ago

Ope, suddenly I remembered I love driving the speed limit.

[-] ClaireDeLuna@lemmy.world 16 points 8 months ago

Oh! A dashed line is approaching...I'm just gonna go 20 under now...

[-] starman2112@sh.itjust.works 9 points 8 months ago* (last edited 8 months ago)

The moment one of these guys decides that my ass is a nice place to park his dick, I'm turning off cruise control until they back off. If they genuinely need past me, they can pass me. If they just want to smell my farts, they can smell em slowly.

[-] jvrava9@lemmy.dbzer0.com 17 points 8 months ago

Add BMW, Audi and modded Jeep drivers to that.

[-] PopShark@lemmy.world 3 points 8 months ago

Hey no we BMW sedan drivers are victims too. We sit lower to the ground than most cars and unfortunately especially the ride height of pavement princess lifted pickups with giant bright LED headlights aligned to attempt to illuminate the stratosphere rather than directly in front of them like they’re supposed to. When the fuckers are behind me many models have headlights at the level of my rear window and side mirrors which is a problem when pickup drivers insist on riding ass all the goddamned time and even at red lights like common why do you like my exhaust smell that much? Matter of fact maybe that’s it, my car’s almost 100k miles a decade old running with a turbo tune and some mixed in high octane race fuel sometimes so the catalytic converter put in its two weeks and now those chemicals are nostalgic to the pickup truck drivers since their stupidity must be at least partially attributed to chemicals otherwise it’s near inhuman

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[-] qooqie@lemmy.world 15 points 8 months ago

I usually just move my mirrors to reflect it back into their eyes, easy with motorized mirrors

[-] xpinchx@lemmy.world 15 points 8 months ago

Heh someone in a Tesla was blinding me from behind and tailgating so I moved both side mirrors and the rear view to aim them straight back. He passed around me over the double yellow line. With him now in front of me and in traffic I just flipped my high beams on and chuckled to myself until he eventually turned off and I put my headlights back to normal :)

[-] 3ntranced@lemmy.world 7 points 8 months ago

Get yourself a flipper zero and you can remotely fold in their headlights/set off car alarm/ open doors of any tesla model you like. "Allegedly"

[-] PopShark@lemmy.world 3 points 8 months ago

I regret to inform you as a flipper zero owner all you can do is amusingly pop open their charge port lids since the flipper can emulate the signal the tesla supercharger units send. I presume when tesla drivers charge up there this means the lid “anticipates” the cable/plug coming for it and opens on its own so the drivers can then make YouTube videos about it like they do with every minor feature. Most of us just press a button or pull a tab on our gas cap / charge port lids to open them but ya know. And it only works when they’re parked I think, at least in my testing. I only tried once on a model 3 stopped near me at a light but no dice probably because the car knows it’s not in park and the driver is still inside lol. But any of their models when parked are fair game, I even took videos for my Snapchat story after bringing my flipper to my local mall that has a Tesla dealership. It’s cool to see the lids how they look on the different models and try to guess where they even are lol the charge ports are like in pillars or halfway up the trunks somewhere lol. Also after a minute or two the lids close on their own in disappointment if nobody plugged anything in lol and yes you can just send the signal again to reopen

[-] xpinchx@lemmy.world 2 points 8 months ago

What about the Hyundai, acuras, Infiniti, dodge rams, and every other car with 69000 lumen HID LED RGBLT lights? 🥲

[-] NewNewAccount@lemmy.world 9 points 8 months ago

This does absolutely nothing beyond making you feel better, just FYI.

[-] liztliss@lemmy.world 13 points 8 months ago

I mean, if it's a difference between light in my eyes while driving and not, I'll choose the latter 🤷‍♀️

[-] ExfilBravo@lemmy.world 12 points 8 months ago

Yeah that's the point. Making me feel better.

[-] pohart@programming.dev 2 points 8 months ago

I don't think i could aim them that well. Do they back off?

[-] lyam23@lemmy.world 2 points 8 months ago

That's what I do as well.

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this post was submitted on 01 Dec 2023
552 points (98.8% liked)

solarpunk memes

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