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this post was submitted on 11 Jun 2024
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parenting
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My friends are teachers and they constantly rant about how atrocious their student's behavior is and they blame millenial "gentle parenting" which always rubs me the wrong way but idk what to say to them about it. Well, it's rather that they're saying people are trying to do gentle parenting but getting it wrong and doing "permissive parenting" instead. But like, I'm pretty sure their behavior is a result of deteriorating economic/social conditions, not because they're "iPad kids". But they're the ones with direct experience so I don't feel right arguing about it with them. I don't spend time with kids all day and talk to their parents.
Also I have a lot of school trauma from being undiagnosed neurodivergent so I never know if it's just me being triggered by their teacher-like behavior or if it's a legit annoyance with the way they talk about children.
It's definitely gentle parenting and not the fact that we have a nation of frothing psycopaths
I have a couple teacher friends who are exactly like this, frequently. It infuriates me no end.
What really annoys me is the way they just describe both children and parents like they're innately bad people who choose to be bad and angry all the time, as oppose to maybe just being affected by their environment and material conditions.
People do not understand the difference between gentle and permissive at all because their parents' boundaries were enforced in such a way that there's no distinction to most people my age and older especially.
This is something i just decided in my head but it does explain it well enough to help me sleep at night
I work with teachers who say this to me directly. But you have to remember, these kids only know the world they were born into, and in that world, sometimes, it just goes to total shit and everything shuts down, and you stay in the house for two months.
THAT'S NORMAL to these kids. They don't understand a world where that isn't NORMAL. So I'm not too surprised when people tell me they have the "worst class they've ever taught" this year, or the last year. It's a phenomenon that has only cropped up since "the end of covid".
What does anything matter to a kid who's understanding of the world is the above? That sometimes, everything becomes weird, a scary, and fucked up, and you have to stay home. I'd be a terror too probably...