this post was submitted on 08 Jul 2026
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[–] TranscendentalEmpire@lemmy.today 4 points 2 days ago (1 children)

didn't mean to direct this at you anymore than at myself.

No worries, I didn't take it that way. I totally agree, sometimes it just feels like leading a dehydrated horse to water and instead of drinking they eat a bunch of sand.

Do you perhaps already know bell hooks book "The Will to Change - Man, Masculinity and Love"?

Yeah i read it a long time ago in college. It was kinda a surprise how much of a revelation it was for a lot of guys. To me expressing your feelings and being intimate with friends always seemed to be natural. However, I am part of a non western immigrant family. So maybe I just didn't get a lot of baggage that is innate to American/western culture.

[–] woodenghost@hexbear.net 2 points 2 days ago (1 children)

I am part of a non western immigrant family. So maybe I just didn't get a lot of baggage that is innate to American/western culture.

Me too, but on my family, the baggage of civil war and early loss left some marks.

I feel ya there, we definitely have some issues for similar reasons but male bonding and not expressing your feelings didn't seem to be one of them.