this post was submitted on 24 Dec 2025
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[–] Imaginary_Stand4909@lemmy.blahaj.zone 2 points 1 day ago (1 children)

Did you ever have a "maybe I'm bi" phase?

I'm asking because an Asexual youtuber stated they thought they had an equal attraction to men and women, before realizing that they did like the equally... at 0 attraction.

I know this sounds crazy, but i did kiss and makeout my same-sex female friends at a sleepover when we were 8-9 years old because we wanted to "practice" (y'all, don't let kids have unrestricted/unmonitored internet 😭), but I never thought of them in a girlfriend/date way. I thought I liked a close girl friend in middle school, but once I got to high school I realized I've never had butterflies, wet dreams, or any desire to kiss any boys or girls that I met.

At this point, I think I'm asexual (or maybe demi). I know that graysexuals can still have some sexual attraction or like having sex, so I don't feel any doubt/imposter syndrome for reading smut (hey, some aces write smut).

Anyway to add to the overall thread I've been questioning since 10 or so, and going with Ace since 16 or so.

After kissing a girl for a first time, realizing I wasn’t into it, my first thought was “oh fuck what if I’ve been gay this whole time?” That night I looked up gay porn 😂 I was very much grossed out and definitely didn’t feel the arousal I would from women.

I did eventually kiss a guy at college because I’m a scientist lol and yeah despite him being a good looking dude, honestly not a fan. Sadly I think I’m just sex repulsed by men

Anyway I’m also aromantic. All my guy friends and girl friends would obsess over crushes and think about lives together or being in a relationship and I didn’t get any of that. Like why should I care who a person sees apart from me?

(Also, me, I am an ace who writes smut lololol at least I did in highschool)