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I’d trade lifespan in order to be able to be in-the-moment just a bit longer during my son’s accomplishments, milestones, life events. It could be just another 5 minutes, or more. But also to be able to have more time in-the-moment for when he needs me to be his protector. Time to analyze and get my head around something that is unfolding realtime. The ability to find the right words, and a way to say something heavy in the right tone and with grace.
Typing this all out made me cry. So much is going wrong for me right now, but the thought of “work will be over soon, I’ll get to be with my boy soon” helps me get through these days. And now I might be losing my dad earlier than I thought. I am worried that I might get sick too. I’d take all of the time I can if it could get me more time for right now.
My heart goes out to you. The bleeding from your heart is the love that it's full of. Cherish every moment with them.
As i'm sure you know, one way we can extend our moments IRL is to document them to be revisited later. Pictures, video, and importantly: journaling about how we feel during events.
How do you think your son would feel about that when you're on your death bed, if he knew? Knowing that he could have had you around for another year or more, if only you hadn't used this power? Do you think those fleeting moments would be worth more to him than those extra years?
How would you feel if he, in turn, decided to spend decades of his own life to extend those last few moments with you?
I guess I had assumed that this ability was unique to me in this scenario. If everyone had the ability, reality would become quite a mess.
They're saying that spending more of your limited time in the moments with your child earlier in their life reduces the amount of time they'll have with you later. With this in mind, if your child found out you gave up length for depth and you'll be leaving the world early because of it, how would they feel?
I'm not the one you're asking, but if I were the son and got to know my dad did this to be with me more in the important bit's of my life, I'd be moved and I'd feel loved.
If I were the dad and my son would consider doing this to extend his moments with the old me, I'd be moved too, but I'd tell him to save it for someone else - his future child or partner perhaps.