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submitted 2 months ago* (last edited 2 months ago) by Mr_No_Swearing@lemmy.zip to c/showerthoughts@lemmy.world

There're better words to use in any situation.

To make the point more clear. As much as people tend to use it in the way they do for words such as 'like'.

I mean people will just say f you, instead of thinking of a witty insult or express an emotion with more expression.

For example, say you want to express that a person is fat, which one is a more cutting way to tell someone they're fat:

  1. "You're a fat-f**k."

  2. "Don't bother trying to stand up. I know you haven't done that in years."

One more thing, As much as there is a time and place you don't curse, it's not a matter of "appropriateness" to me; what matters more is the impact of what's said. I hope my example showcases that.

One last thing, - cause I just starting to realise this matter more to people than I thought it would (nothing wrong with that of course) - cursing doesn't necessarily subtract from a remark as if it's a negative number in a math problem, it's just redundant for speaking (more often than not).

Southsamurai©sh.itjust.works gives a good example of cursing is bland as apposed to just using your brain.

Someone saying "I'm tired of this fucking rain" is more boring than someone saying "I really wish thor would give us a warning before bukkakeing the world".

I just realise this will work as a post in a unpopular opinion space if that exist, lol.

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[-] NegativeLookBehind@lemmy.world 38 points 2 months ago

Cursing is an art, and adds color to otherwise bland sentences and communication. Curse words emphasize tone, inflection, emotion.

If you’re not very good at cursing, maybe you should fuckin’ practice more.

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[-] entropicdrift 28 points 2 months ago* (last edited 2 months ago)

Scientific studies have shown that curse words relieve physical pain better than any alternatives.

So there are some situations where anything else is an objectively worse option.

ETA: I'm willing to bet the reason this is being downvoted is due to the holier-than-thou attitude you're copping, OP. It's also something of a classist-coded cliché to claim that people who curse lack vocabulary, intelligence, education, or creativity. This is, of course counter to the fact that studies have shown that people with higher intelligence are more likely to use salty language.

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[-] g0nz0li0@lemmy.world 15 points 2 months ago* (last edited 2 months ago)

I agree that cursing is often used as a replacement for "um". But you ever really appreciate someone who knows how and when to curse, with intention and as an infliction? It's a joy to behold.

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[-] Rhynoplaz@lemmy.world 14 points 2 months ago

What I'm seeing here is someone who REALLY likes witty quips, but is very upset that nobody else appreciates them.

I'm with you, buddy. None of my snappy responses ever convinced a bully that I was worthy of respect, but his constant repetition of movie quotes always got a chuckle from his cronies.

Smart people know big words, but smarter people know when to use them. Making an impression on others isn't about proving that you have higher value than someone else, it's about proving that you are one of them. Reminding people that you're different from them pushes you away.

Or, I might just be projecting shit I've been through. Maybe it's useful to someone.

[-] Kidra@sopuli.xyz 13 points 2 months ago

Swears are a sledge hammer. Many tasks don't require a sledgehammer. But sometimes you need a sledgehammer.

[-] DrownedRats@lemmy.world 12 points 2 months ago

Not true. Nothing quite gets the point across quite like "shits fucked."

[-] guiguinofake@sh.itjust.works 2 points 2 months ago* (last edited 2 months ago)

Shidders fucked

[-] Aremel@lemmy.world 12 points 2 months ago

I agree to an extent. If overused, cursing can be "edgy" and offputting. However, sometimes you just need to emphasize the emotion of a given statement that mere "polite" words cannot express.

Quite frankly, I do not trust people that do not curse. I feel that they are not emotionally genuine. Conversely, I feel that people that curse too much are emotionally immature and do not know how to express themselves properly. Cursing is an art. It's a linguistic balancing act where one must take the audience and message into consideration.

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[-] WeLoveCastingSpellz@lemmy.dbzer0.com 11 points 2 months ago* (last edited 2 months ago)

What are you? 13? Just let people use whatever words they want. You might think that there is a "better alternative for any situstion" but sometimes nothing like a good "fuck you" drives the point home. It expresses hate in such a simple way without trying to be performative or witty. Also you can say fuck, we aren't in the middle school courtyard for god's sake

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[-] Iheartcheese@lemmy.world 11 points 2 months ago
[-] Randomgal@lemmy.ca 8 points 2 months ago

If I hit my little toe against the bed's leg, the right word is "fuck".

[-] NuWuX@sh.itjust.works 8 points 2 months ago* (last edited 2 months ago)

When I was but a youth, my mother used to regale me with this bit of wisdom: "Profanity is the result of a weak mind attempting to express itself forcefully."

Sometimes I'll reflect on this and think, "God damn, that bitch was a dumb fuckin' cunt if I ever met one!"

[-] callouscomic@lemm.ee 8 points 2 months ago

I always felt people who are concerned with this are compensating for something.

[-] wesker 7 points 2 months ago
[-] Jimmyeatsausage@lemmy.world 7 points 2 months ago
[-] nokturne213@sopuli.xyz 2 points 2 months ago

Cheez whiz and rice

[-] MeDuViNoX@sh.itjust.works 6 points 2 months ago
[-] phanto@lemmy.ca 5 points 2 months ago

Ugh. There's a book about how to be a better boss, and one of the things it says is that adding a mild curse to otherwise normal speech will convince people you are being sincere. My boss read it.

"Well, this damn job isn't going to build itself!"

"Aw shit! Lunch is over! Back to work!"

It was so awful.

[-] Mr_No_Swearing@lemmy.zip -1 points 2 months ago

You've my sencerest condolences.

That sounds as if a punch-line that an alien trying to learn how to be human would have in a comedy.

[-] phanto@lemmy.ca 2 points 2 months ago

He was the worst! Zuckerberg levels of pseudo-humanity. Of course, he got promoted up and away.

[-] EABOD25@lemm.ee 4 points 2 months ago

Fuck that lol. Curse all you want, but curse to people. Not at them

[-] Asclepiaz@lemmy.world 4 points 2 months ago
[-] southsamurai@sh.itjust.works 3 points 2 months ago

This is so far from unpopular.

The general social mores are against cursing. While that has been slowly changing, it hasn't reached a tipping point yet.

It's also not a new opinion. There's a lot of sayings related to it, my favorite being "cursing just gives people permission to ignore you".

The rest of your post? Flawed examples. But that's just my opinion, you do you.

[-] Mr_No_Swearing@lemmy.zip -1 points 2 months ago* (last edited 2 months ago)

Yea I get what you mean, Thanks.

Inregards to the flawed example, how is it flawed?

I'm getting cooked over here, anything will help.

[-] southsamurai@sh.itjust.works 4 points 2 months ago

Well, it was one, I just didn't catch the typo of examples instead of example.

But, you're using an insult. Your example is already something nasty to say, no matter how you say it because you're attacking someone. Using curse words is no more or less effective at pissing the person off enough to shoot you (as an extreme but possible outcome).

For an example to work to support your opinion, it has to be undirected because directed statements are never neutral to begin with.

A better example would be something like pointing out a painting you don't like.

You could say, "that looks like something a five year old vomited up after drinking finger paints"

Or, "that thing is so fucking ugly it makes me want to vomit".

As long as the person you're saying it to isn't the artist, owner, or a dedicated fan of the artist, you have a relatively controlled example where the main difference is the presence of cursing.

See the difference in the examples? If I call you a giant moron, it doesn't matter much if I say fucking moron instead. It's the insult that's doing the work, not the adjective.

Now, this applies at any level of creativity. "You're about as pleasant as the south end of a north bound mule" is relatively creative, as is "you're a bigger asshole than the north end of a south bound elephant" very similar insults, with the significant difference being the cursing.

In that specific example, it could even be argued that the use of profanity increases the effect, and it would, depending on the target. Cursing is an amplifier in a huge swath of the population. "You're a jerk" isn't as effective as "you're a fucking jerk", because that extra step outside of social mores deepens the aggressiveness of the insult.

It's definitely subjective. There are people that would be more insulted by a well crafted, profanity free barb. But, on the whole, insults are about aggression and challenge. It's a form of dominance display to an extent. So using insults as an example for the effects of cursing is flawed by nature.

Now, a better example yet would be the weather. Someone saying "I'm tired of this fucking rain" is more boring than someone saying "I really wish thor would give us a warning before bukkakeing the world". Is bukkakeing an actual word? Doesn't matter, but it struck my mind lol. You can replace the jizz reference with "spitting on", if you feel sexual matters serve the same role as cursing.

Once you remove the insult factor, it becomes more about the cursing itself, which makes a better example and point of discussion.

[-] Mr_No_Swearing@lemmy.zip -1 points 2 months ago* (last edited 2 months ago)

I appreciate the examples and the info.

If you don't mind I want to borrow your rain example for the post, with credit of course ;).

As for the insult sting ability, I understand that if your going to make a sentence long insult then cursing dosen't seem to weaken it's effect, others brought up that it doesn't hurt the insult if swears are used.

I also understand that being offended can be subjective.

I just find that if your going to try to be cunning with words, why give somone the ability to say "You mad bro?"

It's harder & more biting to think of the words where they've to think about whats said than having it morph into a shouting match or something along those lines.

For the second point. Maybe I'm just terminally online, but it seems as if everyone curses & only knows how to curse. When I see a true insult it's as if a breath of fresh-air & it usally stops the other guy in their tracks for a bit. It also has the funny factor for me, but I'm willing to accept that it's my own view on humor.

Outside of christian mom's or people saying not to curse here for: advertisers to feel safe or because it's inappropriate to say it in front of children, my experience is the lemmys down-voting me & saying I'm wrong seem to be the norm for people.

Again, I understand where you arrive from, policing speach isn't cool & people end up doing it for a reason, usually for offensive speech that hurts people. I just find curse words to mean anything & everything, & I just don't find it that hurtful. For example, I live with Jehovah's witnesses that curse. I had my mom curse at me when I was little. It just seems to be "I'm angry" written edgyly if it has emotion at all.

Hope you understand what I mean, if not, let me know.

[-] southsamurai@sh.itjust.works 2 points 2 months ago

Feel free to use the example.

And I get where you're coming from for sure. No worries there :)

[-] femtech@midwest.social 2 points 2 months ago
[-] theywilleatthestars@lemmy.world 2 points 2 months ago

What meaningful things are you saying instead of cursing?

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[-] Interstellar_1@lemmy.blahaj.zone 1 points 2 months ago

You know everyone that you're talking to the literal Mr. No Swearing here.

[-] RAM@discuss.tchncs.de 0 points 2 months ago

aside from your opinions on cursing, mocking people for being fat is not cool.

just like people are born with different hair color, people's bodies look different. You can't tell based on somebody's body type whether they're living as healthy as they can.

Some people could have illnesses that make them fatter. Some people are just fat and healthy. In all cases, you should not mock people for being fat.

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this post was submitted on 15 Sep 2024
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