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Tell you what you're gonna wanna do. Find this fools tree, and cut that shit down. Cheers!
Unfortunately, acts of a god almost always extinguish obligations. Try living inside a fish’s mouth instead, might be more cost-effective.
I tried living in the belly of a fish, but they kicked me out after three days.
Rude.
Same. Like, I took ONE slice of pizza from the fridge. I saw most of a pie in there, no notes or nothing, hey...we are a community. We feed each other. And it was only a coupla slices. But no I am out on the street and pounding my sandals for a new dive.
Darmok and Jalad at Tanagra!
Have you tried cutting your foreskin off and burning it to appease said Jerk? I'm told they like that kind of sick stuff. Failing that, he's partial to blood magic and or ritual killings.
Whatever you do though, don't make bronze images of him as a bull and try to appease that instead, like we used to do for hundreds of years. He hates that kind of thing now days and we all have to pretend we didn't used to do that.
Damn it, I have this bull all ready...
Check to see if their contract with their god actually covers that service, I'm pretty sure those holy covenants are strict by-the-letter deals
That's what I'm worried about. Last time my house got smited with a lightning bolt, my insurance company told me that acts of god weren't insurable.
Quick renters' question: what about flooding?
Only covers events lasting 39 days or less.
I hear that happened way back in everyone's great-grandfather's day, but the animals have since dispersed and there was a rainbow.
Not sure if Jericho or Asgard
Jericho. Duh. Those Babylonian weirdos play trumpets inside the city and what's an Asgard?
Something that protects your hinds
Did they march around the walls a few times as well? If so, you may be f#&-$@
Edit: wow, I can't type on my phone this morning
If you mean wall, yes. The only thing that marches around my waste is all that baklava I've been eating.
I read through your policy and the cuneiform clearly states that you're not insured in Acts of God and the person who blew the trumpet according to his 144,000 followers is a prophet of God and therefore we are not responsible or covering your damages.
Thank you for insuring your home with Babylon Express
Not sure about legal, but have you tried using a bronze mirror to shine light in his eyes? I hear it can be very effective if applied correctly…
this post was submitted on 15 Oct 2024
119 points (96.1% liked)
The Internet in Ancient Times
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Welcome to the stone age... or the bronze age... or the iron age... heck, anything with an 'age' is welcome, except our modern age or any ages to come.
This is about what the internet was like thousands of years ago back when it all started. Like when Darius the Great hired mercenaries via Craigslist or when Egypt invented emojis.
CODE OF LAWS
1 - Be civil. No name calling, no fighting, keep your flint hand axes inside your leather pouches at all times.
2 - Keep the AI stuff to a minimum. It gets annoying and old fashioned memes are more fun for everyone.
3 - None of this newfangled modern 21st century nonsense. We don't even know what "21st century" means.
4 - No porn/explicit content. The king is sensitive about these things.
5 - No lemmy.world TOS violations will be tolerated. So there.
6 - There is no ~~rule~~ law 6.
Laws of justice which Hammurabi, the wise king, established. A righteous law, and pious statute did he teach the land. Hammurabi, the protecting king am I. I have not withdrawn myself from the men, whom Bel gave to me, the rule over whom Marduk gave to me, I was not negligent, but I made them a peaceful abiding-place. I expounded all great difficulties, I made the light shine upon them. With the mighty weapons which Zamama and Ishtar entrusted to me, with the keen vision with which Ea endowed me, with the wisdom that Marduk gave me, I have uprooted the enemy above and below (in north and south), subdued the earth, brought prosperity to the land, guaranteed security to the inhabitants in their homes; a disturber was not permitted. The great gods have called me, I am the salvation-bearing shepherd, whose staff is straight, the good shadow that is spread over my city; on my breast I cherish the inhabitants of the land of Sumer and Akkad; in my shelter I have let them repose in peace; in my deep wisdom have I enclosed them. That the strong might not injure the weak, in order to protect the widows and orphans, I have in Babylon the city where Anu and Bel raise high their head, in E-Sagil, the Temple, whose foundations stand firm as heaven and earth, in order to bespeak justice in the land, to settle all disputes, and heal all injuries, set up these my precious words, written upon my memorial stone, before the image of me, as king of righteousness.
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