Autism

First off, no-one cares about you, except the staff. You may feel like every eye is on you, if they are it will only be a fleeting glance - everyone is more interested in if the nurse has called their name, not in you.

Second, explain you anxieties to the nurse/doctors, ask questions etc. I hope you have a positive outcome.

Here are some ideas. Maybe you could:

• wear noise cancelling headphones

• sit close to the door to minimize the time people can look at you

• take an anti-anxiety drug before your appointment. Benzo drugs like lorazepam are great

I think I am ok with doctors I trust, but with the way that doctors are spread so thin, it's hard to even get the same general practice provider every time. Not to mention the push for PAs to do annual physicals by corporate owned clinics to save money meaning I don't get to build a relationship with a doctor anymore.

My issues are more around doctors not understanding that I don't express pain or discomfort non-verbally and it's easy for them to talk me into thinking it's "not that bad" even with severe pain. Add to that that I'm not good at verbal communication in finding the right words to express things. I've tried expressing this to doctors up front, but they seem to tend to fall back on assuming people are over-reporting issues when I'm always under-reporting. That discomfort then makes me have issues with every appointment since I know they're going to manipulate me into saying I'm not uncomfortable. I miss my old GP who would spend lots of time with me and support me by helping me by believing me, and digging into issues to help me express myself with specialists.

I'm scheduled for my second corrective eye surgery in a decade soon, and yeah I'm a little worried about some kind of complication leaving me blind or something. But there's nothing I can do about it so I just try not to think about it.