this post was submitted on 25 Mar 2026
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WomensStuff

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Women only trans inclusive This is an inclusive community for all things women. Whether you're here for make up tips, feminism or just friendly chit chat, we've got you covered.

Rules…

  1. Women only… trans women are women, and transphobic or gender critical talk isn’t allowed. Anyone under the trans umbrella (e.g. non-binary, bigender, agender) is free to decide whether a women's community is a good fit for them.
  2. Don’t be a dick. No personal attacks, no aggression, play nice.
  3. Don’t hate on groups, hatefilled talk about groups is not allowed. Ever.
  4. No governmental politics, so no talk of Trump actions etc. We recommend Feminism@beehaw.org for that, but here is an escape from it.
  5. New accounts or users with few comments may have their posts removed to prevent spam and bad-faith participation.

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[–] foxglove@piefed.blahaj.zone 1 points 1 hour ago

Please note: this community is women-only, please read the rules before commenting.

[–] WandowsVista@lemmy.world 10 points 1 day ago (1 children)

misandry is bad. and a lot of people confuse the two.

but the outrage is justified. crazy to think that women are still being made to feel less than in the fucking future.

[–] AdolfSchmitler@lemmy.world 4 points 1 day ago

Misandry is absolutely it. I feel like it's like the confidence vs arrogance. It can be easy to confuse one for the other.

[–] Wren@lemmy.today 15 points 1 day ago

There definitely isn't going to be someone from the meme in this comment section.

[–] BarneyPiccolo@lemmy.today 9 points 1 day ago* (last edited 1 day ago) (1 children)

I'm a man, and after a lifetime of work, I can say that I have generally preferred my women bosses more than the men. I've had a few great male bosses, but I've also had some extremely terrible ones.

On the other hand, most of the female bosses I've had have been excellent, some great, and only a few have been mediocre or bad, but none of them were as bad as some of the male bosses I've had.

Today, as a business owner, I also prefer to hire women. They are more reliable, in general, and it's easier to find smart women workers than men. Many men are proud of their ignorance.

[–] ZDL@lazysoci.al 5 points 10 hours ago (1 children)

I'm a man, and …

"… as such feel the need to talk where my talking is specifically against the rules. Because I'm a real feminist and show this by ignoring women's boundaries."

[–] BarneyPiccolo@lemmy.today 1 points 5 hours ago (1 children)

I didn't know it was against the rules. I didn't look at the source, just the topic, and I weighed in. No disrespect intended.

[–] foxglove@piefed.blahaj.zone 1 points 1 hour ago

no worries, just please don't comment or post further, thanks!

[–] DupaCycki@lemmy.world 10 points 1 day ago

Most men don't know what feminism is. They just go by the name and what the most vocal 'feminists' say or do.

[–] MrFinnbean@lemmy.world 8 points 1 day ago (2 children)

If i really really really need to say something. I would say its unfair how often women win in custody dispudes, even if there is no real argument why. Most of the time if its "a draw" the mother wins by default.

Other than that cant really think nothing else.

Well maybe that i live in country where men have mandatory military service, but women dont. But in my mind its okay that women dont have to serve, so i guess im against equality then?

[–] ZDL@lazysoci.al 5 points 10 hours ago

If i really really really need to say something.

If course you really really really need to say something in a group that very specifically asks you not to. Sorry, no. Tells you not to. Rule #1.

Because you're a man and the silly little requests of silly little girls don't matter, do they?

[–] sneakypersimmon@lemmy.today 10 points 1 day ago (5 children)

That’s a misconception. These days, the main reason why women are granted majority custody more often is because men seek out custody less often.

[–] some_kind_of_guy@lemmy.world 4 points 1 day ago* (last edited 1 day ago) (2 children)

Yep, every time I've heard this from a man (and I am one) it's been the biggest red flag, and the woman was clearly the more responsible and dutiful one when all the facts were considered. I've learned to take these kinds of statements from men with a Mt Everest-sized grain of salt. I suppose it could go the other way too, but I've only ever seen men saying these things.

These same men will go through hell to gaslight and distort the reality and opinions of those around them to paint their former partners as crazy villains, and the courts as unjust. In reality, family court has seen it all and will take literally everything they can into consideration for an impartial decision - it's literally their job.

[–] ZDL@lazysoci.al 2 points 10 hours ago

every time I've heard this from a man (and I am one)

Of course you are. And you're in here, where you're asked not to speak, beating your chest over how much on the side of women you are. Because what do women know about their preferences? Surely when they say "women only" that includes men who want to speak, right?

[–] MrFinnbean@lemmy.world 2 points 1 day ago (3 children)

Just as a tought play.

You presume something about the character of the person just based on their gender? And you can dismiss what they say because its the common knowledge that they hyperbole things, because of their gender. And that people are free from prejustice, just because its their job?

Im just teasing you, but you see whats happening here right?

[–] ZDL@lazysoci.al 4 points 10 hours ago

…you see whats happening here right?

Yes. I see two men in a women's only group having long conversations with each other. In the women's only group.

Is there something else I should be seeing?

I know what I want to be seeing. I want to see two posturing baboons realize what's happening here and quietly delete their posts in embarrassment. I also, sadly, know what I expect to be seeing: at least one of the two will make excuses, protest, or otherwise miss the point entirely.

[–] sneakypersimmon@lemmy.today 5 points 1 day ago (1 children)

This is a women’s only community by the way.

[–] MrFinnbean@lemmy.world 3 points 1 day ago (1 children)

Oh shit. The post came up when sorting everything-new. Ill let mod to decite whenever they want to delete my bullshit and see my self out.

[–] foxglove@piefed.blahaj.zone 1 points 1 hour ago

Just please don't post / comment further, thanks!

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[–] ThirdConsul@lemmy.zip 30 points 1 day ago (1 children)

Hot take - men are against de jure "positive discrimination" in favour of women because there's no de jure "positive discrimination" in favour of men.

https://melissahogenboom.substack.com/p/feminism-has-gone-too-far

She tries to explore the statistics where new generations feel that feminism is no longer about lifting up women but putting down men.

It is interesting to see that she mentions that women outperform men academically and in early earnings. She however fails to explore why that happens.

I can't speak about your country and your culture - I can only speak about mine. I will be quoting women feminists (with links), but in Polish (I tried autotranslating them and they seem readable).

Here in Poland men are de jure (and de facto) discriminated against in all levels of education, e. g. https://www.rp.pl/opinie-polityczno-spoleczne/art43786261-jakub-chabik-dyskryminacja-pozytywna-plus-rownosc-selektywna-to-bunt-mezczyzn in early education: girls have now better average scores in language than boys and equal in math, but for their gender girls are offered extra points to qualify for "math excellence extracurricular programs", as uni STEM only sees only ~40% of women. There is no similar program for uni bio or med, where men are only ~25%.

Heck: https://krytykapolityczna.pl/kraj/wieczorkiewicz-istnieja-formy-dyskryminacji-mezczyzn-ze-wzgledu-na-plec-polemika-z-wojcikiem/ - she explores forms of de juro and de facto discrimination against men in Poland, lack of interest from progressive and leftist parties to even mention men discrimantion and issues (and even blaming men for them), and finishes the article saying that she sees the right-wing counterforce parties getting access to men because of all that.

So yeah - if you base your feminism at "When someone is accustomed to privilege, equality feels like oppression", then that feminism is bad.

[–] RamenJunkie@midwest.social 2 points 1 day ago (1 children)

Isn't the default "positive descrimination" towards men?

[–] Oggyb@lemmy.world 3 points 1 day ago

Some people will loudly proclaim so, which makes it seem like a universal unimpeachable truth

[–] MashedTech@lemmy.world 14 points 1 day ago* (last edited 1 day ago) (2 children)

It's hard to reason with people who keep saying "we're fucked because of who women voted. They shouldn't be able to vote.". If anyone has advice on how to convince them otherwise...

[–] JayDee 7 points 1 day ago (2 children)

Don't forget the strawmen that insist the majority of feminists want a heirarchy reversal in society. (And also regularly insinuate or outright say that feminism leads to white men being 'cucked' universally by black men. Really, it all sounds like fetish projection when you look into it enough.)

[–] RamenJunkie@midwest.social 5 points 1 day ago

See also the argument that most anti-LGBTQ+ people are in fact, deeply "in the closet", usually because of religious brainwashing reasons.

[–] Tinidril@midwest.social 7 points 1 day ago

or outright say that feminism leads to white men being 'cucked' universally by black men.

The real psychosocial roots of fascism.

[–] Fluke@feddit.uk 5 points 1 day ago* (last edited 1 day ago) (1 children)

It could be argued that this is why progress is measured in lifetimes. The old must submit to entropy before the new can take their place.

If you're genuinely trying to convince someone in particular, try asking "how?" That should starting breaking the ignorance into smaller chunks that you can repair with truthful knowledge. You might have to go a few layers of "how?" deep to start patching the holes in their understanding in order to build a solid foundation for the rest of what you and I take as obvious.

Edit: At the risk of "stating the obvious" I'll point out that the term "woke" is intended as a derogatory reference to those who have "woken up". Meaning, we learned something that suddenly made everything else make sense. Some missing piece of the puzzle was, at some point, unveiled to us, and we became aware of (at least part of) the bigger picture.

Go wake some people up. 💛

[–] terabyterex@lemmy.world 8 points 1 day ago (1 children)

you mention age but genz is a huge oroblem. people in their 20s right now are fucking bigots

[–] ZDL@lazysoci.al 8 points 1 day ago (1 children)

Yeah, there's been a massive slide backward in young men in particular.

[–] birdwing@lemmy.blahaj.zone 4 points 1 day ago* (last edited 1 day ago)

Social media algorithms favouring rich, wealthy men's views (polarisation) can be blamed, alongside the backsliding of socioeconomic equality, and the rising gerontocracy. When you feel hopeless in your perspective, and all you see is how to blame others, you're inclined to do so. It's a classic "divide and rule" tactic employed by the wealthy.

I try to make them aware of that socioeconomic inequality and to battle for their wellbeing through protest, through supporting equality. After all: another person's equality helps their own too.

[–] arcine@jlai.lu 15 points 1 day ago

Usually it's more like « I know we oppressed you for millennia, but maybe you could ask more nicely for us to stop »

[–] renegadespork@lemmy.jelliefrontier.net 111 points 2 days ago (12 children)

In the many times I’ve had men (and some women ffs) force this explanation upon me, they usually:

  1. Have fundamental misunderstanding of what feminism is. They often think women want dominance over them or something, giving them a victim complex.

  2. Support feminist values in theory, but get annoyed when literally anything at all is asked of them to contribute to meaningful change. (see also: systemic racism)

Neither of these are an excuse and I’m so exhausted hearing them over and over.

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[–] JensSpahnpasta@feddit.org 2 points 1 day ago (2 children)

This thread is s seriously lacking a definition of feminism. People, you are talking about different things. There are so many varieties of feminism. Some are awesome - others like TERFs not. Different countries have different struggles in regard of gender - the situation in the USA or Saudi Arabia is different from that in Europe or Russia.

[–] foxglove@piefed.blahaj.zone 1 points 1 hour ago

Hi JensSpahnpasta - thanks for your comment, but unfortunately this community has a rule that only women are permitted to post or comment, so please don't comment further.

Many thanks and I hope you have a lovely day!

[–] ZDL@lazysoci.al 4 points 10 hours ago

And another man who either can't or won't read a simple, two-word rule.

What a surprise.

[–] sveltecider@lemmy.ca 48 points 2 days ago (1 children)

I find this website equally as anti-feminist as Reddit. Doesn't really surprise me since this website is more male than Reddit and also full of Reddit refugees.

[–] sneakypersimmon@lemmy.today 46 points 2 days ago (6 children)

It's incredibly anti-feminist and misogynistic. It really feels like early Reddit days and 4chan here more often than not.

We've got men coming in this very thread crying misandry because of a somewhat critical tone towards men who aren't feminists.

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[–] Wataba@sh.itjust.works 17 points 1 day ago (3 children)

The only feminism branch I take issue with is the TERF variety, and just to be clear, its not the feminist part of that. I hope that enough of us can agree on that much.

[–] thethunderwolf@lemmy.dbzer0.com 6 points 1 day ago* (last edited 1 day ago)

TERFs aren't feminists

They clearly do not strive for gender equality since they hate, in their words, "women who are men"; this means that they want to distinguish between genders and treat them differently

Feminists strive for equality. Misandrists do not.

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[–] birdwing@lemmy.blahaj.zone 38 points 2 days ago* (last edited 2 days ago) (2 children)

I feel like it'd work better if you'd ask them "should men be treated like how you want to treat women: without a right to decide whether to have a child, without being able to work, without being ... etc.".

I feel like most men don't really understand, unless if they were put in our shoes. I've seen shows where that exactly happens: they get whistled at by even stronger people, they're derided and told their views don't matter, they get lower wages (in simulations), and so on. Some do change their mind after that, at least.

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