this post was submitted on 06 Jun 2026
18 points (100.0% liked)

WomensStuff

1148 readers
400 users here now

Women only trans inclusive This is an inclusive community for all things women. Whether you're here for make up tips, feminism or just friendly chit chat, we've got you covered.

Rules…

  1. Women only… trans women are women, and transphobic or gender critical talk isn’t allowed. Anyone under the trans umbrella (e.g. non-binary, bigender, agender) is free to decide whether a women's community is a good fit for them.
  2. Don’t be a dick. No personal attacks, no aggression, play nice.
  3. Don’t hate on groups, hatefilled talk about groups is not allowed. Ever.
  4. No governmental politics, so no talk of Trump actions etc. We recommend Feminism@beehaw.org for that, but here is an escape from it.
  5. New accounts or users with few comments may have their posts removed to prevent spam and bad-faith participation.

founded 1 year ago
MODERATORS
 

I’ve never been big on exercise. My hobbies are mostly fiber crafts and music, neither of which are particularly strenuous. Plus, I suspect I have undiagnosed asthma, and I finally have a test scheduled in two weeks to find out.

I’m in my 40s and really want to get a handle on my health and my weight, hence the asthma test, and becoming more active and especially adding some weight training is a necessary part of that. But I’m not really fond of gyms. I don’t love working with trainers either, because the ones I’ve tried in the past have pushed too hard and I just shut down; I don’t respond well to that.

But I’m wondering if a women-focused gym is worth trying? Something like a Curves; I know there are others. Please share your thoughts!

top 9 comments
sorted by: hot top controversial new old
[–] StickyDango@lemmy.world 4 points 5 days ago (1 children)

I've never been a fan of gyms myself and the number one and two things that scared me most when. I was started was me not knowing what I was doing, and the stares from guys because I'm the only woman in the weights section. After a while, you get in the mindset of not giving a flying F about anyone else because some of them really have no clue either.

That being said, I have not tried a women-only gym myself, but I have a friend who's in her 50s that goes regularly and enjoys it a lot. She did say that you have to book in early for classes or they fill up quickly. For me, it's been a cost thing. I don't really know why it costs more for women-only.

I think it is worth also to try different gyms (take advantage of free trials. Lots of big name gyms are franchises so you can do a free trial at each one). I've got a Snap Fitness membership and all of the Snap gyms I've been to have different clientele. FWIW, I've been to both regional and metro gyms during quiet and peak times, and it makes a difference. 2PM seems to have the male tradies in, whereas morning and lunch are more women. After 5PM is mixed bag.

Finding a trainer that suits you and understands your needs is really important. I think having one at all helps you build your confidence and teaches you right techniques. I think of them like a psychologist or GP: It might take a while to find the right one, but when you do, it'll be great. Definitely ask if they have free trials, too.

You could also considering getting some weights and doing some gym stuff at home?

Sorry for all the info, it might be more than what you're looking for, but when I started, I was so nervous, too. I wish I had someone to explain everything to me.

[–] proudblond@lemmy.world 3 points 5 days ago (1 children)

Gosh, don’t be sorry about too much info, no such thing, and I asked after all! I do have some weights at home and I downloaded the app Caliber to help me figure out what to do. I just have to hold myself to it. Interesting what you say about different branches of the same gym having different clientele and also the time of day. I am lucky in that I work part-time, from home and with a lot of flexibility (kinda… lots of evening meetings) so I could go in the morning.

There is definitely a woman-tax on things beyond the stuff we know about like tampons!

[–] StickyDango@lemmy.world 3 points 4 days ago

Then I'm happy to provide some advice :) (More info helps with the anxiety. I speak from experience 🙋🏻‍♀️)

Yup, exercise is about discipline. To see results, you have to show up for yourself, because it's you who will benefit from you pushing yourself to do it even on the days you'd rather be on the couch.

I've not heard of Caliber, but keep trying different apps to see which one works best. You can also do body weights, if it starts to cost too much to get equipment. You can also use household things, too! When I first moved to Australia from Vancouver, what did I have? A 5kg bag of rice. I had a friend who squatted with a house plant. Use house things to your advantage!

I would record your sets and reps (8 dumbbell curls using 8kg weights, repeat 3 times; 10 kettle bell squats using 2kg weight, repeat 3 times; etc.) or download an app. I use an app called FitNotes. It's no frills, no ads, no permissions, just basic workout tracking.

You start with, what you're comfortable with, and move up in weights and reps. It is so satisfying to see the progress. Remember - progress is progress no matter how slow and small. If you slide back, it's normal. You'll have good days and bad days. You get sick, you slide back a bit, but your body has muscle memory and it'll bounce back.

Re gym: I've also got a very flexible part time job as well, so I go around 11AM-12PM. There seems to be a bit of a lull around then and just before lunch, but find a gym that is close so you've no excuses.

I think the women-tax thing for gyms is that many women seem to tend to like to do classes rather than be in the gym (I used to do lots of classes for two years, and 95% of the customers were women).. So the fee will often include all of the classes. They may also have lockers, showers, sauna, hot tub, plunge pools, etc. Research what you want and what you need.

Also, not sure where you live, but in certain parts of the world, there's something called a Class Pass. It's a pass that gets you whatever classes you want across the city with whatever gym/studio is signed up. You pay for credits and you can try different classes (pilates, boxing, kickboxing, cycle, crossfit, F45, etc.). It's not cheap cheap, but it'd be something to at least explore what you like if the standard gym isn't your thing. Might be worth looking in to!

[–] ada@lemmy.blahaj.zone 7 points 6 days ago (1 children)

It depends. If one of the barriers of going to the gym was dealing with gym bros, then you'll find it to be a much better, more comfortable environment. But if that isn't what was keeping you from the gym last time, you may still struggle with sustaining the habit.

That being said, if you can get a free trial, it's absolutely worth giving it a shot!

[–] proudblond@lemmy.world 1 points 5 days ago

I have to admit, I do worry about this. I’m not sure it was so much gym bros as just people in general. The gyms I’ve been to are so big and overwhelming. Plus, when stuff hurts, I’m not really motivated to keep doing it, even if it’s “good for me,” you know? That’s part of why I want to figure out the asthma thing first. I will say though that I have always had some sort of women’s group in my life and I definitely feel way more comfortable with just women than I do with a mix, so…maybe. A trial would be great… just wish it could be more than one session, or at least not having to lock in for more than a month.

[–] Mouselemming@sh.itjust.works 7 points 6 days ago* (last edited 6 days ago)

I used to belong to one, not a Curves but a private women's gym. I liked the aerobics and belly dancing classes and having the machines scaled a bit smaller since I'm short. I never belonged to a mixed one so I can't speak to whether ogling or feeling I would have to dress a certain way would have been a problem for me, but obviously I felt like I could just get sweaty in the all-women one.

[–] Greercase@lemmus.org 5 points 5 days ago (1 children)

I don't have personal experience with a woman focused gym, but I can recommend women focused fitness classes. A women focused yoga or kickboxing studio might be a good option. For yoga in particular I've had classes lead by people who are really willing to meet people at their level. Those types of things tend to be mostly female in my area and it's nice because you generally don't have to pay for a membership to a gym and a private trainer. It also feels more like a hobby than just going to the gym. It's also good for accountability and may be a good place to meet some new friends.

[–] proudblond@lemmy.world 1 points 5 days ago

Hmm, I do like yoga, I just never really think of it as “exercise.” But it does help with strength. I’ve never tried Pilates either but maybe I should look into that too. Maybe you’re on to something!

[–] ZDL@lazysoci.al 4 points 6 days ago

A trainer that is not testosterone-poisoned (or mimicking the testosterone-poisoned) is worth their weight in gold. I was fortunate enough to have such a trainer (former student of mine) and he was lovely, working with me on my goals and desired outcomes instead of screaming at me to "motivate" me. I suspect you'd get more such trainers at a women-focused gym, since it seems to be a mostly masculine trait for people to want to be screamed at incoherently as motivation.

But…

One such gym that I tried had only perfunctory weights, mostly machines, and a whole lot of cardio; I was hell-bent on lifting and strength training, so it was not a good match for me. The only cardio I can tolerate is cycling. (The real thing, not those stationary bikes.) I go to the gym to use equipment I can't use at home (like 90kg of weights for squats and dead lifts) to boost my strength and muscular health. Cardio I don't need a gym for. You should probably scope out the gym and make sure that it has the equipment and space you need for your priorities.