If your ass can shit out Plasma or a Bose-Einstein Condensate, you ought to go to hospital
this post was submitted on 25 Jun 2026
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I found a new entry for the bucket list: ass plasma!
Why not Plassma?
Nice
You need only add a lighter to get ass-plasma.
A Bec would be trickier, though.
please do not shove kyber crystals up yer bum
Just don't do doggy with a kyber buttplug, you're one fart away from manslaughter
Can't spell manslaughter without man's laughter!
This is quite the rap sheet you’ve got here.
It says you served 20 years for “man’s laughter.”
Must have been quite the joke.
-- Frank Drebin Jr.
Edit: found it as two gifs and merged them 😁
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You just need to add enough spice to your food to reach plasma
Enough Scoville's and your ass will be burning brighter than the sun in the middle of July
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And the 4th with the help of a lighter.
Regular fire is not plasma.
Is this the moment that someone says “Taco Bell”?
Mfers get the tiniest bit of fiber and capsaicin and suddenly their bodies are all like
Is neon toxic to eat in large quantities?
(I know it's inert, toxic might be the wrong word, I'm more going for would bad things happen)
In quantities you could 'eat' naturally, without injecting it in by force? Yeah, I think that would be entirely safe. (Though you wouldn't want to breathe exclusively neon.)
But, almost all of any gasses you manage to get into your stomach will be expelled as burps. Very little will make it through your entire digestive system and out the other end. If you want neon gas coming out of your ass (I presume to use in conjunction with some electrodes and a power supply to produce actual plasma), you're going to need ... alternate means of ingesting the neon. The simplest and least invasive way would be to stick a tube up your ass and pump neon gas into it through that tube. For your own safety, ensure that the maximum pressure on that gas line is very low. You do not want a ruptured colon. That would hurt. Plus, the neon gas would escape.
Also, even if successful, I wouldn't recommend it. Plasma is, you know, hot. And assholes don't like being very hot.
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The ass produces nothing, it's merely a conduit.
I hate in courtrooms when the prosecutor produces a witness and everyone has to wait nine months.
Lovely vignette, I'd argue that courtrooms could do with a bit of sexy times.
But following that logic your ass can produce dick, too.
OP's can't produce condensates, plasma, or any of the ~45 niche exotic states of matter?
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It doesn't produce them. It simply emits them. The whole body produces them as a collective effort.
So can the stomach, sometimes both of them can do all at the same time.
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Where's the Bose-Einstein condenshit?
How about plassma?
Y'all gotta hit up Taco Bell and then add ungodly amounts of third party hot sauce.
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What to say after you fart in a crowd (or elevator).
“Take that!”
“What do you say?” like prompting a child to say thank you.
"That'll be five bucks, you pervert"
“Not a bad sound out of a half inch speaker”
“Did you hear that spider bark?"
“Someone step on a duck?”
"That duck's got bad breath"
Forest Area Reticulated Tree Spiders (FARTS)
“A bit more choke and that engine will start”
“Did you hear what that asshole just said?”
“There’s someone behind me talking shit!”
“Keep shouting Sir, we'll find you”
"So sayeth the King"
“I shouldn't have trusted that one”
"I don't remember eating that."
“That’s gonna itch when it dries”
''Two sniffs of that would be greedy''
“The the horns working, now try the lights”
“Thank you for coming to my Ted Talk”
“The Rear Admiral has spoken”
(Just before you fart) “Alexa, play something by Ed Sheeran”
“Don’t worry, (name), I’ll tell them it was me!”
“You’ve/I’ve got a turd honking for the right of way.”
“Ahh, the ghost of dinners past”
“You got that one for free, next one you will have to pull my finger”
"As foretold by The Prophecy."
“Now your turn”
The toothless one speaks !
“Sounds much better after my tune up”
“Aaaand...scene!”
“That was supposed to be a song but came out of the wrong end”
“Message from turd castle”
“Glad I'm not in my Space Suit”
“Damn! I was saving that for the elevator”
“An empty house is better than a bad tenant”
“Guess what I had for my last meal”
“This haaause is noww cleeeean”
“carpet frogs”
“Now that I have your attention, we will have a moment of silence for all those that have died in elevator accidents”
Pretty sure mine produced a 4th after eating that hot sauce the other night
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It can also accept all 3 forms of matter.
....G-gas...?
No. I refuse to click. I can only imagine it’s cartoon bicycle pump nonsense even though it’s likely some cursed fetish shit.
You will not inflict this upon me.
Its... a guy with a bike pump up his ass for the first half of the video and the second half is him bare ass farting after removing the pump. Kinda surprising to see on youtube TBH. The look of surprise on his face says it was his first rodeo.
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Can it really produce solids though? Just seems like a really viscous liquid…
We need a +50 years shitdrop experiment to prove that all shit is liquid!
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You must eat enough fiber. Try being dehydrated and eat nothing but meat for a week. You can build a house out of those what you will produce.
If you ask a material scientist, glass is also just a very viscous liquid.
No it's not.
The thing about old glass is that the manufacturing process was different and produced glass with variable thickness.
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What if you ate a lot of corn?
I think the sphincter or something can even detect whether its gaseous or solid (but not liquid) and probably the reason why sharts exist.
If there is some anal captain out there, please help me out.
That is correct. Wanted to bring up this fun fact myself.
Your ass, genitals, and mouth can all produce all three states of matter.
Penis…..gas?
Yup. There are a few medical conditions that can cause you to fart through your urethra. UTIs, and damage to your bowel mainly.
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Penis queef.
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