Jesus wouldn't have had politics we would find legible to us today, because the political landscape is contingent on the material conditions of a given place and time.

It's certainly interesting that the Bible is a series of documents written on the margins of empire, and that might inform how to think about it today. But Jesus himself would have had political opinions that do not map onto our modern, post-French Revolution, ideas of "left vs right".

You gotta remember, despite everything we say, everything we've written, the laws in place, the rapidly growing atheism, the US is a theocracy first and foremost. The religion is just as important as the economy, employment rate, or the opinions of the ruling class.

Considering that the majority of vocal Christians vote Republican, Jesus being very explicitly leftist presents an opportunity to nudge them left. It certainly won't convince all of them, but there are those who actually value their prophet more than their politicians.

Anyone who cares about diminishing the Republican stranglehold on America should care that Jesus was a leftist, even if they didn't personally care about Jesus.

Honestly it isn’t like a lot of us care other than pointing out the insane levels of hypocrisy the right engage in while claiming to love Jesus.

No no. Top right panel is 100% correct and top left desperately needs to hear it.

I have long ago reached the end of my tolerance for religious nonsense. I will not engage in any serious discussion about religious fairy tales. If I want to discuss fictional world building, I'd rather talk about Lord of the Rings, or Star Trek, or Star Wars, all of which are far more interesting works of fantasy fiction than any religious lore.

We have to stop allowing religion to be an influential force on our government. If people want to embrace religion in their personal lives, that's their free choice to make, but they should be considered the oddballs that they are, and should be dismissed as serious political candidates, since they proudly believe in, speak to, and get advice and guidance from imaginary beings in their head.

That weirdo should not be making decisions about the future of our country. It's like the olden days, when they would take the ravings of a schizophrenic as messages from God.

The only reason the world cares about the US is because we're stupid and dangerous.

In the words of grandson, "Jesus was a 5'4" brown-skinned socialist, nothing like the man on that crucifix"

If Jesus were here now I'd be desperately trying to lick his washboard carpenter abs

Jesus could be here now and he would be seen as a conspiracy theorist.

Could be David Icke for all we know. But doesn't matter does it...

Just speaking as someone who grew up in a hyper conservative cult, I think sowing cognitive dissonance in the minds of religious youth is a great way at getting them to realize they are being taught bullshit. Hearing that Jesus's views didn't align with the views that had been forced upon me made me want to read the Bible and make my own decision about God and religion. I started my read fully expecting to end up with deeper faith and ended up crashing out and losing all religious belief, which was my first step towards me being a leftist today. All because of people pushing back on what Jesus would think of religious conservatism.

You cared enough to make a meme

Jesus today: "For god sake, I kept saying to these 4 retards that men have to find the way by themselves and they basically wrote an How To you guys blindly followed for the last 2000 years ?!"

Jesus was pro-choice, though, there is a verse in the bible giving instructions on abortion (via beatings).

"Faker than blue eyed crackers nailed to a crucifix" - immortal technique (lol)

Jesus never used toilet paper.

Early Christianity was nothing anyone would recognize today. It was more like if Diogenes was blissfully happy instead of being a little shit.

The culture war was designed to keep us fighting amongst ourselves while the rich techno fascist pedo freaks continue to steal everything that isn't nailed down.

I mean, at least two billion people are Christian, so presumably they care. And that doesn't even include the rest of us who get screwed over by Christian-conservative doublethink bullshit.

It absolutely matters.