679
True love
(i.postimg.cc)
"What's with all the bags of ice?"
so you say you always bring an empty cooler with you on a first date. that's interesting
Takes off all clothes to get ready for some love making .... "What? You want me to wash my body first? .... OK?" ....everything goes black
"Why does everything smell like iodine and pine needles..... /slump
Last thought before passing out, "awe, I'm going to miss out on all the sex."
Drop the bullshit and tell me your exact blood type
Nice try Dr Acula!
Dr. Jan Itor
Of all the things in that picture, what bothers me still is why only London written in cyrillic?
It’s the way Tinder renders. ‘Lives in’ shows up in the language/alphabet of the app of the creator of the profile, while all other headers are processed in the language of the viewer of the profile.
It actually serves as a decent trick for learning the language settings on the app of a person who’s profile you’re viewing.
You know what, same.
Partner for “life”.
I can fix her
Watch out, or she'll fix you
The benefits of having a gf surgin
If she's surgin' for cash, she may bring in a surgeon to grab your kidneys
She didn't ask for him to have a job
Or be over 6'. You have a point.
Organ dealers don’t see height 🥺😍
they dont care about appearance, what they do care about is whats inside!
Respond to the posting with you mentioning that you live alone and have O- negative blood type cause fuck it you only live once.
There were urban legends back in the 80s and 90s about tourists in beach resort cities hooking up with attractive women in bars and discos, going back to their apartments or hotel rooms to keep drinking, passing out, then waking up next day... without the corneas of their eyes! Completely blind!
The one I used to hear was waking up in a tub of ice without one or both kidneys
A friend of mine many many years ago met a girl on a dating site and mentioned it to his mom. She announced that it was a kidney harvesting scam and would not let him go on the date unless he agreed to check in with her afterwards. During the date she texted him multiple times to watch his drink and make sure he doesn't get his kidneys harvested. When he didn't respond fast enough she called me and made me promise I would go and rescue him if it happened. After the date she wouldn't accept text messages that everything was fine. He had to call her and make sure that she could hear his voice. She also called me again and asked me to drop by his apartment to make sure he was there.
She really was a nice woman, just a bit touched.
"What kind of decent, good-looking woman would want to go out with my son"
Haha I promise you it wasn't like that. It was the whole dating someone via the Internet that set off her.
goes on date
Man- "lets play a game, i tell you what i like about you and you tell me what you like about me.
Olga- "how valuable your are to me" (whispers under her breath) "economalicly"
Eh more of a operation guy tbh
Sounds more like a "till death do us part" rather than a long time partner to me :/
"lifetime" partner :-)
Suspicious
must reside within 5 hectares of the М̷̩̦̩͕̆̈́̇̊о̶̡͉̱̺͉̦̐̍̍͗̋р̶͇͍̈̆͋о̷̨̝̺̪̥̱̹̫̦̝̝̥͚̺͐̓͋̾͒̋̏͐̈́͌̊̎͜͝з̶̧̡̹̜̪̟̭̤͚̤͎̳̓̉͋͘ͅо̷̨̦̋в̸̙̙̑ͅо̵͓̹̲͕͈̫͇̤̾̄̐͊͑̅͗̌͌̅͘ city-centre
"What's with the fava beans and that nice bottle of chianti?"
🚩🚩🚩🚩
Must enjoy ice cold baths!
Way too suspiciously specific
Well one more reason to do drugs
Hey, that's me! I have both lungs/kidneys, even heart rhythm, don't smoke, drink, etc. Where's...NOHAOH?
Definitely in Bulgaria /s
https://youtu.be/j29i9lL-DA8?si=A5w6qH0rsW40Ppj9
(Yes I know, it's London)
load more comments
(1 replies)
high value bearer bond life insurance also a plus.
lives in DHJFFGGDDHFFSHHJ
It says London. Odd it's in Cyrillic script.
She's uni-boob! From Russian London
Handcuffs first date, I'm out
If you leave out the hardworking those standards are actually quite low
Hmmmmm
view more: next ›
this post was submitted on 24 Oct 2023
679 points (98.3% liked)
Lemmy Shitpost
27191 readers
4178 users here now
Welcome to Lemmy Shitpost. Here you can shitpost to your hearts content.
Anything and everything goes. Memes, Jokes, Vents and Banter. Though we still have to comply with lemmy.world instance rules. So behave!
Rules:
1. Be Respectful
Refrain from using harmful language pertaining to a protected characteristic: e.g. race, gender, sexuality, disability or religion.
Refrain from being argumentative when responding or commenting to posts/replies. Personal attacks are not welcome here.
...
2. No Illegal Content
Content that violates the law. Any post/comment found to be in breach of common law will be removed and given to the authorities if required.
That means:
-No promoting violence/threats against any individuals
-No CSA content or Revenge Porn
-No sharing private/personal information (Doxxing)
...
3. No Spam
Posting the same post, no matter the intent is against the rules.
-If you have posted content, please refrain from re-posting said content within this community.
-Do not spam posts with intent to harass, annoy, bully, advertise, scam or harm this community.
-No posting Scams/Advertisements/Phishing Links/IP Grabbers
-No Bots, Bots will be banned from the community.
...
4. No Porn/Explicit
Content
-Do not post explicit content. Lemmy.World is not the instance for NSFW content.
-Do not post Gore or Shock Content.
...
5. No Enciting Harassment,
Brigading, Doxxing or Witch Hunts
-Do not Brigade other Communities
-No calls to action against other communities/users within Lemmy or outside of Lemmy.
-No Witch Hunts against users/communities.
-No content that harasses members within or outside of the community.
...
6. NSFW should be behind NSFW tags.
-Content that is NSFW should be behind NSFW tags.
-Content that might be distressing should be kept behind NSFW tags.
...
If you see content that is a breach of the rules, please flag and report the comment and a moderator will take action where they can.
Also check out:
Partnered Communities:
1.Memes
10.LinuxMemes (Linux themed memes)
Reach out to
All communities included on the sidebar are to be made in compliance with the instance rules. Striker
founded 2 years ago
MODERATORS