Not to kink shame but is this some sort of cuckold thing I'm too asexual to understand?
Nah, you aren't supposed to have sex before marriage.
They get around this by putting a penis in a vagina but not moving at all. Someone else jumps on the bed to cause the movement.
They get around this by putting a penis in a vagina but not moving at all. Someone else jumps on the bed to cause the movement.
But like does a significant amount of people actually do this?
No, it was just a dumb hoax.
I knew guys who thought bjs and anal weren't sex, so jebus would still love them
The ol' poophole loophole.
I don't even know if this is something that actually happens or just internet rumors...
Mormon God: Damn, they got me.
Do they quantum teleport the dick? Because insertion... involves movement?
If ya gotta jump through these hilarious hoops to not feel bad about fucking, can we at least optimize?
Can't you just soak and un-soak repeatedly? Is there a skill cool down that has to be respected to not make sky grandpa mad?
Religion: God is all knowing, all seeing and wise.
Also religion: If you ask your friend to move you inside a vagina, god won't know you're fucking!
Sounds like a threesome with extra steps
As my Mormon friend said, God is like a T Rex, it can't see you if you don't move
Actual Ex-Mormon who attended BYU here: Soaking was never a thing, I have only ever heard about it on the internet or literally in the context of Mormons laughing about non-Mormons believing in Mormons doing such things (yeah, they're meta about it).
What is an actual thing is Mormons getting married super early (for a multitude of reasons, one being the horny). Easily over 70% of the students I knew were married by the time they were seniors in college.
Sorry to break it to you but I also attented BYU and soaking was totally a thing, we just never invited you.
What religion does to people.
Somehow god is all-knowing, but forgot to consider the loopholes.
To be fair, that's pretty close to describing the Jewish faith. One fundamental tenet is that God put loopholes there on purpose, and it's the rabbis' duty to debate legalistically to extrapolate what he meant based on what he said. That's why they're called laws. (I was raised jewish, for the record)
One common one that most people have heard of by now since they went viral on youtube a couple years back, is eruvim. Since there's a bunch of rules around how much effort you're allowed to exert on the sabbath (e.g. you're not allowed to move anything from inside your house to outside, or to carry anything heavy more than about half a meter while outside), people hang a wire, called an eruv (plural eruvim), encircling an area ranging from a small neighbourhood to several city blocks to the entire island of Manhattan, proclaiming it to be one big "home", allowing practicing Jews to do anything they're only allowed to do at home, anywhere inside its area.
Another fun one that has a lot of ramifications is that we're not supposed to "start a fire" on sabbath, and rabbi have traditionally declared that turning something electrical on or off is "starting a fire". Because of this, jewish hospitals have elevators that run constantly between floors so people can just walk on without actually pushing a button and causing a circuit to close. Or lightbulbs; for the longest time, the "solution" was just to leave your lights on all saturday in case you needed them, or maybe spring for electronic timers, or just get your goyim buddy to come over and turn em on for you, but with the modern prevalence of LED bulbs, there's now jewish smart lights called "shabulbs" that have internal shutters which cover the LEDs without actually extingishing them, so you can turn it back "on" again without breaking the rules. Some places even sell ovens with a shabbat mode so they stay slightly warm all day and never turn all the way off, don't show the display screen, and don't turn on their internal lightbulb when you open them after sundown on friday! All this because there's a rule against starting fires.
Maybe I got a bit off topic, but my point is, In some ways you might say that finding loopholes in Abrahamic law is practicing religion lol
All this because there's a rule against starting fires.
Shit... I though people over here were nuts... thank you for proving me wrong.
didnt some religion have a concept where since they believe god infallible, any loophole in the rules must therefore be intended, possibly as a reward for the cleverness of finding it? I forget which one that was
Im intrigued. Is there any porn of this?
Hahaha sometimes religious people are hilarious
I attended BYU-I in person for three years. There was a lot of dumb s### that happened there, but I can say with confidence this wasn't one of them. To not be a buzzkill though, I'll share an actual saying that people use around campus: "BYU I do." Because like 80-90% of students there expect to be married by the time they graduate.
Thanks for the insight - jump humping and soaking sound like the kind of bullshit my parents would believe because it was featured in some local news story.
Most "teen trends", especially those related to sex, are just wildly blown out of proportion "stories" based on a couple of people trying something weird, someone else hearing about it, and now suddenly all the teens are doing it.
It reminds me of being in high school when my mom asked me if my girlfriend's jelly bracelets were a sex thing because she heard about girls owing sex acts to guys who can break one.
brainrot
Wait, is this same logic why my fridge has a "Sabbath" setting? 🤦🏼♂️
I was just thinking it's similar to how Jews try to trick god. At least I'm not the only one.
I'm a Mormon, and this just can't be real. Sexual contact is sexual contact. How would people told to leave enough room for a Bible between them while dancing think that this would be okay?
I'm convinced this rumor exists just because people want it to be true.
Tide pods
There is a hilarious mockumentary called "Jury Duty (2023) where there is a scene like this.
Worth a watch, James Marsden is in the show as well.
Edit: Here's a link to the scene
Reminds me of some Muslim girls that only do anal so they stay a virgin.
Omg That's disgusting! Where?
It’s not actually a real thing. Maybe a couple (throuple?) horny Mormons did it, but its not like standard practice.
