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submitted 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago) by nave@lemmy.zip to c/lemmyshitpost@lemmy.world
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[-] FoundTheVegan@kbin.social 255 points 1 year ago

Fake for any of those wondering.

But keeping employees based on how many lines of code they have written, which he did, is essentially the same logic.

[-] Ilovethebomb@lemm.ee 21 points 1 year ago

Ernest Hemingway was paid by the word, which shows in his work. I imagine this pay structure would have a similar effect on how people code.

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[-] AA5B@lemmy.world 19 points 1 year ago

I would do so poorly there, in many ways …. I love those days when my lines of code is negative

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[-] Alchemy@lemmy.world 215 points 1 year ago

Employee that was mining crypto on the side is hella stoked at this news.

[-] Really_long_toes@lemmy.world 62 points 1 year ago

Meanwhile his mate sitting across from him was gpu mining

[-] jecht360@lemmy.world 14 points 1 year ago

Probably mining dogecoin or something else Musk would like.

[-] CADmonkey@lemmy.world 144 points 1 year ago

So, the bonus goes to the guy who was playing Factorio when he should have been working?

[-] Land_Strider@lemmy.world 28 points 1 year ago

Isn't Factorio very optimized, not in the sense that it uses all system resources completely, but in the sense that it has very efficient code enabling millions of operations and increasing without needing much more system resources to scale it?

I would definitely go with Arma in this case. Although it has very heavy calculations for a lot of things to start with, it can't scale well and cause CPU bottleneck very soon.

[-] dfc09@lemmy.world 14 points 1 year ago

Factorio definitely taxes CPU usage heavily if you're building a mega base. Don't get me wrong, it's gotta be a big ass base, but you could just import somebody's monstrosity and run it in the background.

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[-] kuberoot@discuss.tchncs.de 13 points 1 year ago

It is pretty well optimized. I think it might not be, like, genius-level amazing, but the devs care about performance and worked to improve it.

In the end though, it's a game where the entire map (as generated so far) is simulated - I think there's cases where chunks go to sleep, but it's not Minecraft's "stop simulating anything not next to a player". When combined with players building lots of machines moving many, many items around, you'll inevitably end up with some serious CPU usage. Not a problem on a decent computer, but I have had friends struggle on weak laptops, even getting dropped as they literally couldn't keep up with the server.

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[-] horndogAI@sh.itjust.works 138 points 1 year ago

I’m glad to hear this is fake but it seemed 100% believable to me

[-] homesnatch@lemm.ee 104 points 1 year ago

The part where it said "Christmas Bonus" should have been the tip off...

[-] extant@lemmy.world 25 points 1 year ago

That's because you assume it means financial reward but the real reward is the privilege to serve the company, what a bonus!

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[-] MystikIncarnate@lemmy.ca 13 points 1 year ago

That's the joke.

Elon is so random and unpredictable that you can make up just about anything about him and nobody will really know if it's satire or not....

[-] Conyak@lemmy.tf 96 points 1 year ago

I assume this is fake since no one at X is getting a Christmas bonus.

[-] lseif@sopuli.xyz 12 points 1 year ago

it was edited from "salary" to "christmas bonus"

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[-] amzd@kbin.social 75 points 1 year ago

I love receiving a bonus for mining Bitcoin on company hardware

[-] ExLisper@linux.community 65 points 1 year ago

cat /dev/urandom | grep "dickhead"

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[-] Tischkante@discuss.tchncs.de 54 points 1 year ago
  1. Write batch file listing the contents of c: recursively and changing to c:\windows doing it again, then loop.

  2. ???

  3. Employee of the century, free brothel on mars.

[-] Krafting@lemmy.world 13 points 1 year ago

Just exec a fork bomb

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[-] CharlesDarwin@lemmy.world 50 points 1 year ago

I so hope this is fake, because this is so stupid, even by Space Karen standards.

[-] dual_sport_dork@lemmy.world 50 points 1 year ago

Wasn't he firing people based on number of, or lack of, code commits at one point? Even if this isn't real, it's still very on-brand.

[-] odium@programming.dev 19 points 1 year ago

Lines of code too iirc. This is about equally accurate.

[-] jonne@infosec.pub 17 points 1 year ago

My most productive days have ended with negative LOC. It's such a trash metric that only someone that's never been a developer could dream up.

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[-] MentallyExhausted@reddthat.com 13 points 1 year ago

That’s what this is satirizing, yeah

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[-] norgur@discuss.tchncs.de 50 points 1 year ago

So those who misuse company assets to enrich themselves b mining crypto get rewarded by larger bonuses? Sounds like the way the world works for those super rich fellas like Elon "Edgelord" Musk.

[-] someguy3@lemmy.world 42 points 1 year ago
[-] LinkOpensChest_wav@lemmy.one 54 points 1 year ago

I can't even tell anymore

His entire life is a shitpost incarnate, and not a very good one

[-] skankhunt42@lemmy.ca 16 points 1 year ago

I have no idea but I had the same question. I also love the fact that We'd believe that he'd do something like this.

Please tell me it's real.

[-] 0x4E4F@sh.itjust.works 39 points 1 year ago

Monero, here we come!

[-] KingThrillgore@lemmy.ml 38 points 1 year ago
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[-] AlexJD@feddit.uk 32 points 1 year ago

Oh god he'd actually do this and employees would have to try to get the weakest CPU possible so percentage utilisation would be higher.

[-] Vilian@lemmy.ca 23 points 1 year ago

just run a stress cpu program 24/7

[-] jonne@infosec.pub 16 points 1 year ago

Suddenly everyone at Twitter starts mining crypto.

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[-] NaoPb@eviltoast.org 28 points 1 year ago

Allright, everyone install Prime95 for best bonus.

[-] thoughtorgan@lemmy.world 27 points 1 year ago

I'd have the biggest bonus at my company.

Old school RuneScape 😎

[-] TheBlue22@lemmy.blahaj.zone 27 points 1 year ago

Time to play modded minecraft during company time

[-] therealjcdenton@lemmy.zip 25 points 1 year ago

Sweet all that time playing TF2 will finally pay off!

[-] meathorse@lemm.ee 25 points 1 year ago

Prime95 for maximum bonus!

[-] Ascend910@lemmy.ml 23 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago)

Mining away~

[-] catlover@sh.itjust.works 20 points 1 year ago

while true; do npm ci; done

[-] HawlSera@lemm.ee 19 points 1 year ago

So the Janitor gets nothing and the guy slacking off playing Deathloop gets a fortune.

[-] minamoog@lemmy.world 18 points 1 year ago

gentoo users stay winning

[-] Thcdenton@lemmy.world 17 points 1 year ago
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[-] Smk@lemmy.ca 13 points 1 year ago

He should base it off RAM too. I mean, when you work, you must have millions of tabs open.

[-] IWantToFuckSpez@kbin.social 13 points 1 year ago

Just turn on a cryptocurrency cpu miner.

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this post was submitted on 13 Dec 2023
494 points (91.0% liked)

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