my friend texted me "i have forgotten to tell you something important" at 6:30 am today and she has not followed up. zero idea what that means. not fun for anxiety
Moss
Things have been getting better and better for me! I started on sertraline two months ago and the difference it's made is insane. The only downside is that I can't cum nearly as often but that's a small price to pay. Also I want to give credit to myself as well. I've been going to therapy and getting a lot out of it, I've been talking about mental health with my friends and family and I've been having a healthier diet and exercise routine.
Which brings me to what went really well for me last week, which is that I did a 3km walk into college and then did a workout or a swim four days last week. And I felt really really good about it, and I'm very motivated to go again. I had some muscle pain after the first day but I didn't let that stop me, and it went away very quickly as I kept exercising. I've also been eating better. I've cut out a lot of snacks, and I'm having breakfast nearly every day now.
Mentally, I've realised just how depressed I was for the last few years, and I've only noticed that because I'm not that depressed anymore. I can recognize that the ways I was just passing time until the end of the day were unhealthy coping mechanisms, and I feel much fresher and have more energy now. I still have ADHD, obviously, and I'm not a productivity freak like some of my neurotypical friends, but I've felt like I can take more actions in a day now. One thing I noticed is that I'm not inexhaustible even when I feel great. I went for an early walk and swim yesterday and had to lie down all afternoon because I just had no energy. But I'm glad I was using yo my energy at least
Last night I dreamt that I went to a nude beach in Portugal and some American lady yelled at me for having my butt out
What fictional character made you go "oh hmm hang on I'm not cis maybe"? For me it was Kris Deltarune. I saw them eating moss and being nonbinary and I was like. Hmm. Yes. I can get behind that
I was never a huge fan of Coke, Fanta or McDonald's, but since I started boycotting them I have realized how much I don't like them. I don't miss them at all, and I don't know what keeps drawing people back to that crap
Like the world is getting worse and worse and I'm just supposed to do what? Study for my exams? Clean the dishes? It's so insane
Is anyone else really really scared by the world at the moment? It feels like everything is spiralling so quickly
Couldn't be me for real because I've become uncomfortably aware of how I live my life and am actively changing
depression talk, basically just a stream of conciousness ramble
its wild that i can feel myself changing, because you generally dont notice how much you change until later, but i can feel myself coming out of depression. ive only just realised how bad a place i was in. i was really socially isolated, i barely did anything with my time, i felt like i only had a few hours in a day where i could be "productive" and the rest of that was just devoted to doing or being on autopilot. and while i was going through it i didnt realise how unhealthy that was. but now i do, and i can feel myself wanting to be more productive, and more social, and have more time in the day to be a real person. im still not where i want to be. my biggest problem is my serious weed addiction. but i want to overcome that problem now, whereas before it didnt. it felt like a lifeline, now it feels like i dont need it anymore. dammit ive lived up to the depressed stoner stereotype. but i can recognise that that's bad, and i'm in a better place now! like i actually feel a lot lighter, and thats crazy!
started watching house md. wilson is so hot
Fr though I love Elliot. I don't even watch anything he's in or care about him as an actor, but he's easily the highest profile transmasc celebrity. And for him to transition with so many eyes on him, with so much judgement, with so much negativity, was really brave. He's inspirational
ok she got into a master's! i wish she had said that in less vague terms lol, but im very relieved its good news