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traaaaaaannnnnnnnnns
Welcome to /c/traaaaaaannnnnnnnnns, an anti-capitalist meme community for transgender and gender diverse people.
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Please follow the Hexbear Code of Conduct
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Selfies are not permitted for the personal safety of users.
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No personal identifying information may be posted or commented.
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Stay on topic (trans/gender stuff).
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Bring a trans friend!
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Any image post that gets 200 upvotes with "banner" or "rule 6" in the title becomes the new banner.
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Posts about dysphoria/trauma/transphobia should be NSFW tagged for community health purposes.
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When made outside of NSFW tagged posts, comments about dysphoria/traumatic/transphobic material should be spoiler tagged.
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Arguing in favor of transmedicalism is unacceptable. This is an inclusive and intersectional community.
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While this is mostly a meme community, we allow most trans related posts as we grow the trans community on the fediverse.
If you need your neopronouns added to the list, please contact the site admins.
Remember to report rulebreaking posts, don't assume someone else has already done it!
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WEBRINGS:
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Well, you want honest thoughts, so imma be honest here. A lot of baby trans people just aren't very safe to be around for other trans people when it comes to things like residual cishetnormative habits, internalized transphobia, trauma dumping without warning and especially rampant untreated dysphoria they need to vent about without knowing how to talk dysphoria in ways that do not reflect back on other trans people and harm them. It's work helping the younglings along. And specifically in regards to your question, i usually do not feel much more comfortable discussing sex with freshly cracked eggs than i do with cishet guys. There's already some notable differences even before the crack, many transbians have always felt different from straight guys for very good reasons, but there'll also be tons of learned behavior she hasn't unlearned yet.
Here's the main difference to cis guys, tho: Eggs can, and usually deeply want to learn to act better than that, and when you do not want to be seen as a man, you can shed patriarchal ideas much faster than somebody who has to maintain a masculine gender role. Transfems can improve on these things at a lightning pace that will never be achievable for cis dudes, not even queer cis dudes, because a transfem coming out of her shell actively wants to discard things that men feel a need to hold on to. So i'm trying my best to give the egg / baby trans crowd room to grow and to learn, and to be less harsh on them than i'd be on cis people. But yeah, it often costs a lot of spoons. I feel an obligation to do that work and give back to the community, but it can be demanding when you see somebody with a lot of baggage to unpack and don't know where to begin.
That's very fair even if it makes me a little sad.
I'm surprised that this is a bigger reason then internalized transphobia. I would have thought that would be more of a risk to other trans people then my dysphoria/how I vocalize that dysphoria.
I really appreciate you (and all the other people!) who help give back to the community in that way, I'm sure it does cost a lot of spoons. And yes so much to shed
i guess it's more about what i encounter most often than about what fucks with me the most
At least here I tend to find that our beloved eggs are pretty okay about knowing what to hide behind a spoiler. I click em all the time because Idk, but while I can't speak for everybody it hasn't been a problem to me tbh. I think people find unlimited hardcore dysphoria venting more fatiguing than people working through internalised bs.
I hope I spoiler everything I need to
At least for me and [personal subject that upsets me] just having a heads up that's what I'm about to read helps a lot. idk why exactly. Probably the same for dysphoria posts.
Yeah that's pretty much it I think. Bonus points the more stuff you spoiler, lol.
Good post. However babyish I am, I’m glad I don’t have much baggage to burden others with.
GOOD POST I never really considered that it's work helping the younguns along, I guess I have a brain parasite that makes me enjoy it.
Also do not spend all of your spoons