this post was submitted on 01 Mar 2026
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Science Memes

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[–] Wren@lemmy.today 38 points 16 hours ago* (last edited 16 hours ago) (2 children)

Shout out to my broken coworker who brought his crystals in to work one day to fix our negative energy. After carefully placing each stone according to universal leylines of good vibes, extraordinarily pleased with himself, immediately saw me slice through a package and into my fingers. I needed eleven stitches.

[–] Jolteon@lemmy.zip 7 points 5 hours ago

Negative energy can never be removed, only transferred. He obviously didn't like you, the skeptic, so he transferred all the negative energy into you from your other co-workers. /s

[–] ignotum@lemmy.world 24 points 15 hours ago (1 children)

That's just how the magic stones remove the negative energy from your body, through bloodletting

[–] Wren@lemmy.today 19 points 15 hours ago

It all makes sense now. The universe balanced my humors.