My favorite is sending an apprentice to the tool crib for a long weight.
Tool crib guy will say "Yeah it's out back, I'll go grab it", and then go for a smoke
In Germany we ask apprentices to fetch a spare bubble for the spirit level.
That actually seems like it could be a legit thing, like a replacement tube.
When I worked in a hardware shop in the 90s an apprentice mechanic came in and asked for halogen for headlight bulbs
I went into the storeroom and brought him one of those giant packing bubbles
He was chuffed as fuck
My senior manager at work once tried to start a vacuum cleaner, apparently he had never used one before. Anyway the cleaners told him the power cable was in fact a rip cord like on a generator.
God I've been seeing way too much Gen Z slang that I almost forgot "sussed out" is a real phrase that means actual things.
My friend’s dad thought he could send me to ask my dad for a square drill bit when I was like 10 but my dad had me helping him build an airplane in the garage as young as possible. So I told him
"You mean a mortising bit?"
All these comments analyzing the trauma behind a joke, no one mentioning the anger issues of kicking in the front door
We should definitely overthink this.
I mean, definitely some anger issues. But normally when they're kids, the anger issues (MOST of the time) come from the parents' parenting.
Like unless you're chemically imbalanced (normally runs in the family, so people should know if they carry it, or have some other existing condition, that level of anger is a Nurture and not a Nature.
My dad sent me out for headlight fluid and VW-20 elbow grease if you can't tell.
or
it could be a teen fresh into puberty underestimating their own strenght
Or they could have just busted in a screen door lmao
"Broke a door" could mean damn near anything, maybe a piece of molding came off. Doesn't necessarily mean that they took an ancient oaken door off its hinge or something
there's something in computer networking called Cisco discovery protocol and I used to teach new interns about it by making them find every Cisco access point we had in the building.
On work experience the guy sent me to get a long weight and I was like to myself 'fine ill go look for something that doesn't exist and have my lunch too. If you want a long wait..' I go back and he gets off his ladder exasperated, goes to the van and gets a long string plumb line.
My high school chemistry teacher told me that when he was in university, they'd send the frosh chem majors down to the depot to get a "bucket of mercury". The depot guys would be in on it and fill up a bucket and laugh at them while they struggle to move it. Even a small bucket would weigh something like 200 lbs.
That seems a bit much for a prank since mercury is a toxic substance.
Not long ago they didn't care so much about that. He also talked about how they'd play with it with their bare hands. He's not dead because mercury is only toxic when ingested.
Edit: in retrospect, he is dead. I forgot that cancer got him a few years back and that high school was 30 years ago...
He’s not dead because he absorbed so much chemicals over the years it all cancelled out. Those tech room uni workers are supermutants. That’s why you are so scared of them instinctively when meeting one for the first time.
Embarrassing someone for not knowing something is stupid.
It's critical thinking. In life, it's not always about knowing but about understanding.
It's also about having thick skin and the ability to take a joke. Nobody is hurt, it is funny when you think about it, and it will encourage you to think about things in the future.
I do not need to know turn signals don't require blinker fluid. Because it's a fuckin light bulb.
The people in this comments section are acting like this is somehow traumatic. How fucking sheltered are you people?
Yeah it’s often done a bit to get you used to the environment which includes joking, but it’s also to make you think before you do.
On a drive when I was ten, I asked my dad why the tall, skeletal towers had blinking lights. He said so planes wouldn’t crash into them. So I asked what the towers were for, and he said to hold up the lights.
That fucked with me for like ten more years.
We did trash bags for exhaust testing in the army. Have the privates fill the bags up from the exhaust on a cold start, tie them up, then bring them to the motor pool sergeant. You have to label and sign the bags though.
When I was a starting line cook, they told me to recirculate the air in the freezer. I said "what?" They said "recirculate the air in the freezer." while handing me one of those giant black trash bags. I opened the door to the freezer, opened up the bag fully, and then went "wait a minute..." they had a laugh, and I started eyeing all of their requests through the lens of "is this bullshit?"
Later on, at more professional jobs, they have the same sort of requests. Not ones that are hazing jokes, but just actual bullshit assignments that mean very little, are looked at by nobody, and that accomplishes nothing. Except now those assignments are like 90% of the job. Hooray office work among middle management!
The Scoutmaster of my troop got a kick out of sending new kids to the camp nurse to ask for "some fallopian tubes so we can start a fire".
In the British army, getting sent to the quartermasters stores for a long weight (wait).
I live in Quebec and we're pretty bilingual around here so I've heard these hazing jokes in both languages. My favorite in French is sending an apprentice for "une clé taurus".
While camping, I was sent to the ranger station to ask for a “left handed smoke shifter”. Fortunately for me, the ranger had no poker face and just laughed. I felt like a dumbass, but it was a long walk back to the campsite, so by the time I got there I was able to laugh with everyone else.
Legend has it there was a boy scout troop that actually built a left-handed smoke shifter, such that when a young scout arrived from a different troop searching for one, they could send him back successful.
The only thing of this ilk that I've participated in is sending interns to the supply room for a box of checkmarks.
Joke was on them. There was no supply room.
Was a guide in a youth movement, had one child that was way too disruptive when I tried to make camp for the group.
Sent him to the supply room to bring a straight rope. 30 minutes latter he comes, dragging along a straight rope, taking every turn very slowly, taking a fuckton of leaves with it. Camp was built.
When I was in charge of the supply room I saw many funny requests, and some that thought the very real device they were asked to bring was a prank. My favourite pranks are electricity powered and trees straightner.
I miss those parts of being a teenager.
New hires are usually sent to get the "board stretcher". The wild goose chase will take them everywhere in the shop and sometimes as far as the owners, who politely send them back around to some section they'd already been.
People tweeting stuff. We allow tweets from anyone.
RULES:
