Just rawdogging that new planet.

Remember the episode where Trip gets pregnant, and he gets all broody and he rides the man lift in engineering up to demonstrate that the things which are at perfect hand rail height, that you'd probably like to hold onto while riding a lift in a large vehicle that might move suddenly, shears right past a support in its hoist way so if you did actually hold it like a hand rail you'd cut your fingers off?

Starfleet be negligent.

The questions Enterprise never answered for me: When they're between planets and Porthos has to poop, does he just poop on the floor of the ship? Are there little puddles of Porthos pee that crewpeople slip on? Is there a crewman whose job is dog cleanup duty?

That's basically the premise of Lower Decks lol

I considered that, too.

Enterprise is an exploration and research vessel so maybe their whole thing is they're doing experiments on a shoestring out in the middle of nowhere.

literally no one, in any of the crews, or star fleet command follow the rules

at some point of another, ever single one of those motherfuckers says fuck it this is important to me, and justifies stealing space craft, breaking the prime directive, anything they want to

every. crew. every. show. every. movie.

it's kinda a star trek must

In my day, we made the redshirts wear the cup.

Is this Sam Kirk? .... I guess we now know how he died.

Ironically, Data survived that, twice

STAR TREK: THE NEXT GENERATION
"THE CLOSET INCIDENT"
INT. ENTERPRISE - MAIN BRIDGE

PICARD (turning to Geordi) Mr. La Forge, we need more power to the shields.

GEORDI On it, Captain.

Geordi hurries to a small, inconspicuous closet at the side of the bridge. He opens the door and steps inside. The closet is cramped, filled with various cleaning supplies and equipment.

INT. CLOSET

GEORDI (whispering to himself) Alright, let's see what we've got.

The lights in the closet flicker, and a low hum of machinery can be heard.

INT. MAIN BRIDGE - CONTINUOUS

The crew on the bridge looks puzzled

WORF (raising an eyebrow) Did he... Go into the closet?

PICARD (trying to maintain composure) Starfleet decided the production was too expensive.

Riker stifles a chuckle. Suddenly, the console beeps and the shields increase power.

PICARD (exhales with relief)

Geordi emerges from the closet

GEORDI (tapping his combadge) La Forge to bridge, power levels are stable.

PICARD Nods awkwardly.

PICARD Excellent work, Mr. La Forge.

The crew exchanges amused glances.

FADE OUT.

Was it installed on Tuesday?

Probably the only thing that made sense in Into Darkness.