this post was submitted on 11 Nov 2025
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A Boring Dystopia

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cross-posted from: https://sh.itjust.works/post/49618224

"The design drew inspiration from the concept of "a piece of cloth"

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[–] bear@lemmy.blahaj.zone 45 points 1 month ago

$80 more for a longer strap is pretty funny.

[–] jared@mander.xyz 39 points 1 month ago (1 children)
[–] cerebralhawks@lemmy.dbzer0.com 36 points 1 month ago (2 children)

Apple fanboy here and what the actual fuck is this? This would have been funny on April Fool’s Day. It’s now the dumbest thing I’ve seen online all day, and I’ve seen a fair few dumb things. Maybe all week.

[–] socsa@piefed.social 23 points 1 month ago (1 children)

This is your emerging self awareness.

[–] cerebralhawks@lemmy.dbzer0.com 3 points 1 month ago (2 children)

Yeah, step two is to buy a Pixel with iPhone 11 level performance and just not give a fuck that Google sells my personal information off the back porch.

Nah, I don't agree with everything Apple does. Like the Vision Pro. I get that it's not a VR headset by Facebook and that it's a "spatial computer." I don't care, it's not what I want and I certainly don't need it. And the iPhone Pro... it meant something before, but this generation? Base 17 is all I need. The optical zoom is a lie (it crops its main camera to get you 2x zoom) but it's good enough for my needs. Never cared about the iPad, but my wife loves hers. HomePod is expensive but good (like Bose, though maybe not as good as Bose, I dunno). I like Macs. I like the idea that you can buy a computer and not necessarily be the product. Like yeah they all have telemetry, but I don't have to have Candy Crush on my Mac because King... well, I guess Microsoft owns King now? Bought them with Activision. Before, it was because King bought the rights to Windows 10 users. Macs aren't perfect, but they don't do shit like that.

I dunno, I'm not a brand evangelist, I just like what I like.

[–] RaoulDuke85@fedia.io 12 points 1 month ago (1 children)

I was an Apple fanboy too, but with all the bootlicking they've been doing, I have a feeling they will create a backdoor for Trump admin to use. I've jumpe to Pixel 9a with Graphene OS. I like it so far.

[–] cerebralhawks@lemmy.dbzer0.com 1 points 1 month ago

I wouldn't go so far as to say a backdoor, but I do see them removing apps at Trump's behest. In fact they've already done so (and so did Google), the ICE stuff.

The future isn't apps that are curated by an app store, it's on the web where they can't easily control it. They'll need to block it at the network level, but a VPN could get around it. Then it's 100% on the user.

[–] MadMadBunny@lemmy.ca 7 points 1 month ago (1 children)

If Android fanboys could read they’d be very upset

[–] Wigglesworth@retrolemmy.com 8 points 1 month ago* (last edited 1 month ago)

I don't give a fuck what you normies do.

We're all on 7-year old Androids on Lineage. Upgrade, to what? Malwarephone 14? I'm good.

[–] flatplutosociety@lemmy.world 13 points 1 month ago

This is just something Apple does once in a while. Remember when the new Mac Pro model came out a few years back and they sold optional wheels for the tower that were just wildly overengineered and cost hundreds of dollars? These "Apple is selling something SO EXPENSIVE" stories just sell the idea of Apple as a lifestyle luxury brand. You'll never see anyone with one of these in real life, but you can bet they're included in swag bags at celeb events.

[–] apfelwoiSchoppen@lemmy.world 22 points 1 month ago (2 children)

Also that photography direction, "Like what if you made it look as poorly lit as possible by shining a flashlight on the product?"

[–] Fredselfish@lemmy.world 13 points 1 month ago

This is dumbest thing ever seen. People who buy these and use them should be shunned.

[–] fartographer@lemmy.world 11 points 1 month ago (1 children)

That's Apple's style. It's their artistic way of telling you that you're only as valuable as the products you buy.

[–] apfelwoiSchoppen@lemmy.world 5 points 1 month ago

I'll take your expertise, ye Fartographer.

[–] apfelwoiSchoppen@lemmy.world 19 points 1 month ago (1 children)
[–] Asetru@feddit.org 3 points 1 month ago

It's 3d knitted!!

[–] Kolanaki@pawb.social 19 points 1 month ago* (last edited 1 month ago) (1 children)

From the title I was thinking a smaller, cheaper iPhone.

Nope. It's an overpriced bag for your overpriced phone. 🤦‍♂️

[–] blitzen@lemmy.ca 6 points 1 month ago

“Bag” is charitable.

[–] Theoriginalthon@lemmy.world 12 points 1 month ago

Ah yes just what everyone needs an isock

[–] solrize@lemmy.ml 11 points 1 month ago

Wtf, I thought this was going to be a new small iPhone to replace the 13 mini which some people miss. But no, lol.

[–] Davel23@fedia.io 9 points 1 month ago

Do they sell one with "I'm a Fucking Moron" printed on it? Because they should.

[–] noride@lemmy.zip 8 points 1 month ago

Oh neat, a knitted sheep's scrotum in an assortment of colors.

[–] henfredemars@lemdro.id 7 points 1 month ago

I thought this was the onion! But no, it's real!

[–] EndlessNightmare@reddthat.com 7 points 1 month ago

WTF am I looking at? Like a money belt (but a sash) for your phone?

[–] fartographer@lemmy.world 7 points 1 month ago

When stretched, the open textile subtly reveals its contents and allows users to peek at their iPhone display. iPhone Pocket can be worn in a variety of ways — handheld, tied onto bags, or worn directly on the body.

"Subtly" digging around your shoulder-holstered tube sock.

They forgot to mention that you can also use it as the world's most expensive roll of quarters.

[–] tynansdtm@lemmy.ml 6 points 1 month ago

This is pretty egregious, but honestly anyone who wants to buy it should. They deserve to ~~be swindled~~ have what they paid for. Anyone who doesn't want to buy it, won't.

[–] RoquetteQueen@sh.itjust.works 5 points 1 month ago

And people complain about the price of hand-crocheted items...

[–] LodeMike@lemmy.today 5 points 1 month ago

Stop giving this dumpster fire oxygen

[–] novibe@lemmy.ml 4 points 1 month ago

For people confused about the price, just look up any clothes by Issey Miyake. That’s the costly part, Issey Miyake.

[–] f314@lemmy.world 3 points 1 month ago

I mean, if this was sold by Issey Miyake themselves, it would probably be pretty well aligned with the rest of their prices. But being sold by Apple as an Apple product, the price feels really out of place.

I’m not saying $2-300 for this would be reasonable in any case, but it might have been more expected. Also, fun fact: All of Steve Jobs’ black turtlenecks were designed by Issey Miyake!

[–] Arcane2077@sh.itjust.works -4 points 1 month ago (1 children)

Samsung fanboys will see this and say “fuck apple”

[–] Viking_Hippie@lemmy.dbzer0.com 8 points 1 month ago (1 children)

As will everyone else with an accurate perspective of that walled garden of exploitation and grift 🤷🏻