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Don't let your curiosity fade
Maintain open minded compassion for those different from you
Never be fully convinced you understand the best way to do anything
In disputes between the affected and the unaffected give added weight to the most affected
Learn to recognize a moral panic, and even if you have concerns related to it don't join in. It's the group dynamic equivalent of spiraling and catastrophizing.
Don't drink your calories unless you want to gain weight
It's way easier getting in shape young. Don't put it off.
Don't get too attached to anything.
My advice would be not to listen to advice people on the internet give you.
Which would include your advice you're posting right now so then that means that they should listen to the advice people on the internet give you ?
Yeah, getting people to think for themselves is a paradox.
Exactly! π
Does anyone have advice specific to adhd or neurodivergence in general? Things you found helped you that took time to realise?
It seems obvious now, but it took me too long to realize I don't have issues focusing on things, I just have a hard time focusing on things I'm not interested in. I was a terrible student in grade school and took some time off after I graduated before going to university. That time away allowed me to mature and gain the discipline I needed to get through the stuff I wasn't interested in. I then breezed through my major because I loved it.
Don't spend as much energy on trying to improve the things that you're bad at. Figure out your strengths and lean into them.
If you have ADHD, get medicated. While it's no replacement for good habits, it makes starting those good habits SO much easier. I wish I had started taking it 15 years sooner.
If you also have ASD, a lot of people aren't going to understand you. The way you view the world is different. Be kind and be true to yourself and you'll meet lots of people who appreciate your difference.
Spending time being doing nothing actually helps your focus later, boredom is good for you and actually promotes creativity.
Don't multitask, you'll just end up half-assing every task.
If you have the means, see a psychologist who specializes working with people who are neurodivergent. It will greatly improve your communication skills. If you're in a serious relationship, get couples counseling even if things are going great. This will help you break down any communication barriers before they have the opportunity to become resentment.
I could keep adding to this list, but having an exercise routine is probably one of the best things I did to improve my focus. Plus I also get the long term health benefits of strength training.
These are good.
Be honest with yourself about your social battery. If a friend wants to watch a movie I try and tell them if I'm Down to hang and watch a movie so long as it's okay that I don't give it my undivided attention (aka are we gonna watch a slapstick comedy where I can check my phone or draw while watching or are we putting on Schindler's list).
Being honest with my friends and partner as to where my focusing levels are at has saved a lot of conflict and has made people feel more respected (from what they've told me!)
Exercise and eating right actually do help. It's just really hard to do without meds for me
Dont do any drugs harder then psychedelics. But especially dont do opiates and benzos. I would rate opiates, besides, and alcohol as the worst drugs to use.
Yes I am an alcoholic, but I avoided the other two. Honestly wish i had access to clean cocaine because id probably prefer that over drinking. Saving opiates for my elder years because im sure I will be hurting alot by then and will need them.
However, its your body. You choose. Heck the rules. Isn't it obvious the rules never mattered? Some think it is a recent phenomenon, but we are only being publicly informed. it has always been true. Oh the slaves are free? Guess they are prisoners now (slaves).
Opiate addict I talked to said your body was never meant to feel that good. That stuff wrecked my brother (a different addict).
Educate yourself, and question everything. No one is worth following blindly. If you don't understand the "why" of something, keep digging until you do. Critically thinking is the most valuable skill you can have, so develop it as much as you can.
There's usually more than 1 way to do something.
Sometimes people get caught up on wanting to do it the best way, and then they just dont do it at all.
If there's an easier, less ideal, maybe slightly more wasteful way to do something, and its the difference between doing it or not, just do it that way and dont get hung up on perfection if the alternative is not getting it done.
If its something that needs to be built into a habit, it might be enough to get you started, and then maybe you can move on to the better way in the future.
Edit: just to clarify, often times the outcome is the same but people get caught up on the how vs just getting it done. Don't get caught up on the best how if there's another way that'll also work that you will find easier to do.
This life has no meaning. Absolutely none. Do what you enjoy. You don't need a "purpose," grind culture is toxic and will only lead to burnout. Slow down and listen to the birds sing.
Whatβs your advice for younger folks? Nihilism!
Optimistic Nihilism, is quite a good philosophical framework.
But I would recommend a mixture of optimistic nihilism and stoicism.
If nothing has any inherent meaning, the things you chose to be meaningful are as valid as any other choice.
If you take nihilism far enough, you loop back around to absurdism instead. And thatβs where things go from βwhy bother? Nothing matters so what is the pointβ to βwhy not? Nothing matters so I might as well enjoy life.β
Never, ever stop asking why
People are the most suspicious of the behavior they are most guilty of. The guy who thinks everyone is stealing from him, is probably stealing from everybody else. If it's your boss, keep an eye on your paycheck. The person who always thinks their person is cheating on them, is probably a cheater. People do this because they're trying to excuse they're own behavior - "I only do it because everyone else is doing it to me," even if they aren't.
Commit to doing something difficult, even if it's just a hobby, like running, working out, playing a musical instrument, writing, painting, learning a language, cooking, reading classic novels, birdwatching, etc. Having something that's important to you, and investing deeply into it, will fulfill your soul, and give you something good to hang onto when times get tough. And they will get tough. And don't tolerate people around you who dismiss or are disrespectful about it. It's important to YOU, that's all that matters. Their validation is irrelevant.
The first point is not just true for the guilty, but also their victims. Once burned, twice shy.
Don't buy your wife a wide vase. Just get her a normal sized one. Otherwise you'll have to buy twice as many flowers for the rest of your marriage.
Be willing to burn bridges. Some people really do need to be told to fuck off.
Keep learning new things.
Learn cursive and develop your own handwriting.
Writing down things physically makes learning way easier. And keeps your brain young - because, there is a reason why dementia is hitting some people in their 40s.
Edit: brush your teeth and floss every day. If you don't like to floss every day get a water flosser for those days.
Cursive as a primary concern and dental hygiene as an afterthought? Hot take...
Keeping your mind young is primary concern.
Dental hygiene you should already have.
but as much effort as you can into math. There is the common trope about it being useless and that is I think due to peoples misunderstanding of it. Math is mental abstraction. Math problems are like excersise. No on complains push ups have not real world value. Its understood that doing them gets your body in better shape to do physical things. Similarly math helps your mind be in better shape to do mental things. Unfortunately you don't really do it after you are no longer in school so its not bad to try and use it whenever you can. Add your purchases up in your head and try and figure out price per quantity and compare products. do suduko. Also grab elementary logic if you can as it gives a math like framework for reason.
1.) If you think you'd be happier living somewhere else, start putting things into motion now. Moving is hard, but it's harder when you're older.
2.) If you're depressed, working out will not make your depression worse. It's supposed to help. Give it a shot. Don't forget.
3.) Don't have kids.
4.) Don't date people that you think are dumb, even if they're incredibly attractive.
Absolutely second the don't have kids. Best decision I made in life.
I absolutely agree that many people should not have kids, and nobody should feel pressured to do so, and everybody should think twice before they do if it really is what they want and they are ready for that.
But as "general advice"? Sorry, but this is ridiculous.
Saying this as a fucking exhausted parent of a baby. It is hard, but absolutely no regrets here.
Of course if you value your own free time and activities above everything else, then yes, definitely please do not have kids. There will be no time for anything but baby care and the bare minimum household maintenance for a long time.
When I was born, there were 4 billion people in the world.
There are now over 8 billion.
That means in just my lifetime, there are twice as many humans on Earth.
I 100% feel the planet is over populated, and that it is a major factor in issues we face today.
I absolutely think people should be encouraged not to have children.
There is plenty of space and resources to go around. The problem is the 1% dumping all waste in the ocean so they can buy more boats.
Also, if everyone would get at most 2 children, humanity will shrink on average. Don't see why somebody should not have kids just because somebody else had "too many".
Richer people in general have less kids. Fixing world hunger would go a long way. But somehow with an abundance of food the elites decided that starving Congo is better for that 0.01% extra profit.
From what I've read fixing world hunger would not be that expensive, in the grand scheme of things. Too bad that the poor just don't have a lobby.
I believe world hunger perfectly encapsulates all problems humanity face.
We have the means to solve it already but we simply don't.
Stretch, hydrate, learn. Continuously.
Iβll add: take care of your teeth cuz theyβre expensive, and learn to cook before you move out.
don't listen to your elders, they're the dipshits that have the planet in this mess politically and particularly ecologically, they don't know shit.
Okay youngins make sure you do the opposite of what everyone says in this threat!
I agree with you but I'm also just being silly . Maybe the better argument is be selective as to which elders you listen to.
Start saving for old age now. It might seem like a long way off, and you might not have much money right now to begin with, but being young and poor is way better than being old and poor.
Don't "save".
Invest.