This is somewhat relatable: I'm building a dating app without blackjack and hookers. Well, at least without the blackjack.
Not gonna lie, it's not a weekend project! And that's before even considering the eventual launch and marketing.
this post was submitted on 14 May 2026
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Will your dating site have a theme?
Is there a monetary goal behind it and if so,
how would you deal with the service becoming a huge success,
while consequently memberships drop?
Thank you for asking.
The theme can be answered a number of different ways.
- In one sense, I strive to at least support (if not outright focus on) minorities rather than simply catering to the mononormative.
- In another sense, one goal that doesn't directly relate to dating is to offer a platform that is independent (of Match Group) and EU-centric in terms of both client focus and technical infrastructure.
- I want to bring back a lot of what has been lost to enshittification in other apps, things I've personally been missing and also seen being a common complaint when dating apps in general are discussed online. If you've been on, say, OkC more than a year, you'll probably remember valuable, useful features that just aren't there anymore.
- If you've been on any dating app, you know how icky and frustrating and just straight up annoying the apps themselves are (before you even factor in the behaviour of the users, and their reasons).
Ideally, a dating app should have massive amounts of transient users. If you have users who've been there for years, you're not giving them what they want (but you might be giving them something else in order to keep them hooked...).
So as for the monetary goal, there are many gates that must be passed before finances become a critical issue. I've published things as open source, and if six users find you, you have six happy users. A dating app not only requires a massive amount of users, it also requires significant local user density for it to be useful. I am fundamentally aiming for low cost of upkeep with the goal of enabling the app to survive having relatively few users, even if they aren't paying much.
I can say this much: I've done the math and am pretty confident in being able to deliver at a fraction of the cost of any existing offering. My plan is to offer no free tier (huge barrier, I am aware) but then offer a very-reasonably-priced paid tier that unlocks everything. I want the app to be transparent, helpful, and eschewing dark patterns and money-grabbing schemes. I don't expect you to believe it, but I'm not doing this for the purpose of profit; I just don't think a dating app that's entirely free is going to work very well vis-a-vis attracting high-quality participants.
Do I think I've "cracked" or "solved" online dating? Absolutely not. There are things I know I will never do, other things I know I'll be (almost) the only one to do, and a number of topics and issues that I don't know even can be resolved in any meaningful way.
oooh so sorry, but that's a meme. -12 piefed score, also your instance is now shadowbanned. Gotta deal with the consequences of your actions chief...
Fun fact, Rimu takes after George Orwell and keeps lists of "undesirables:"
I'm so insulted by not being on that list!
new life goal
Seems people that post more than comment weren't on the list, or maybe I am not familiar enough with the others.
I guess to be fair I never actually posted anything on piefed, I just called him out when he came to troll on lemmy.
I didn't either, lol. Just @'d a certain "history major" social fascist from a Lemmy.ml thread, debunking claims about the 1930s soviet famine.
lmao that's definitely a bannable offence
For the devout anti-communist Rimu? Absolutely. Here's the MOG thread discussing it.
CW: Ableism, misgendering
these people just can't help tell on themselves
Yep it's abundantly clear.
Haha wow, I can't believe I made the list for calling him an asshole that time. I was wondering why there was so much less crap on my feed lately.
To be fair, being banned does not mean you do not see it, just that they do not see you.
Fuck, I gotta post harder
You'll get there!
Did he miss mine?
What the hell! How am I not on this list! Unforgivable.
Gotta grind those points up!
I thought this comment would have done it.
Fair enough, I would think that would earn you a ban over some of what the others posted.
Fuck, I am not on the cool club list.
Better try harder to get on it for rev 2!
i'm somehow disappointed that i didn't make the list. lol
We'll all get there one day lol
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Tale as old as time...I've seen it so many times in my professional life and also in activism. Hell, I've done it.
Things look so easy from the outside. All the flaws seem like they can be fixed without much effort, why can't the people in charge see it? Then you rush in and try to do it yourself without an understanding of why things are the way they are and BAM you hit a wall. Suddenly things aren't so easy. Suddenly you can't fix all the mistakes. And you are making new ones.
I'm not saying people shouldn't try new things, but rushing in without trying to take some lessons from the existing systems without judgement is foolishness.
My secret is that I talk myself out of it before I even start : D
I've never been able to talk myself out of anything. Like I will have the entire thought process and think maybe it's a bad idea, and I shouldn't speak my mind, but I really want to so I do. It has not yielded good results
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