230
submitted 9 months ago by DJSpunTheDisc@lemm.ee to c/asklemmy@lemmy.ml

I'll give it a shot, "I thought I apologized already, but whatever…"

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[-] Delphia@lemmy.world 131 points 9 months ago

"I'm sorry you feel that way" is up there.

[-] Dsklnsadog@lemmy.dbzer0.com 13 points 9 months ago

Only right answer.

If you don't think the same, I'm sorry you feel that way.

[-] JohnDClay@sh.itjust.works 12 points 9 months ago

And that's most every corporate apology out there!

[-] paddirn@lemmy.world 8 points 9 months ago

Classic non-apology.

It’s not that I did anything wrong, it’s just that you decided to feel offended about it, that’s the real problem here.

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[-] Sombyr@lemmy.one 92 points 9 months ago

I had a teacher tell me to drop out then be forced to write an apology letter for it.

She wrote "I'm sorry you thought I told you to drop out."

So I'm gonna say "I'm sorry you thought" is high up there. Straight up gaslighting.

[-] Potatos_are_not_friends@lemmy.world 16 points 9 months ago

Drive me nuts.

Its definitely some fucked up attempt at uno reversing. They can't admit mistake. Or worse, rather than try to understand the disconnect, they went into "it's your fault".

Don't confuse it with the "I'm sorry you feel that way" as sometimes it sounds similar and used to the same effect, but different because it's not trying to shift blame, but acknowledge your emotions.

[-] Dirk@lemmy.ml 52 points 9 months ago
[-] Delphia@lemmy.world 42 points 9 months ago

That one entirely depends on what the "but" is. You can be sorry and have an entirely good reason for fucking up. Its not a great start though.

"You slept with me and didnt call me all week!"

"I'm sorry but there was a TNG marathon on"

I'm sorry, but my mom died"

[-] dom@lemmy.ca 10 points 9 months ago
[-] shapesandstuff@feddit.de 8 points 9 months ago
[-] themeatbridge@lemmy.world 6 points 9 months ago

The card did say "moops."

[-] chaorace 50 points 9 months ago

🚫 Conditional apologies:

  • "I'm sorry if..."
  • "I'm sorry but..."
  • "I'm sorry for [not the main thing you should be apologizing for]..."

🚫 Apologizing on behalf of the recipient:

  • "I'm sorry you feel that way"
  • "I'm sorry you came to that conclusion"

🚫 Insulting the intelligence of the recipient by way of apology:

  • "I'm sorry for not being more clear"
  • "I'm sorry about being so misleading"

🚫 Non-apologies:

  • "I apologize for..."
  • "It's regrettable that..."
  • "It was terrible to..."

When in doubt, keep it simple. Get the main apology out ASAP, then carefully start saying your piece afterward. Focus on yourself if the situation demands explaining yourself (many don't). Be extremely careful to speak only constructively about other individuals during the apology (if you can't say something nice...).

For example: "I'm sorry. I didn't mean it like that. Is there anything I can do to make it up to you?"

[-] Cralder@feddit.nu 42 points 9 months ago* (last edited 9 months ago)

🚫 Insulting the intelligence of the recipient by way of apology:

  • "I'm sorry for not being more clear"
  • "I'm sorry about being so misleading"

How are those insulting? Saying that I should have been more clear means I am the one who messed up by not communicating properly. Something like "sorry that you misunderstood" would be insulting since it places the blame on the recipient's intelligence.

[-] scubbo@lemmy.ml 17 points 9 months ago

They're not inherently insulting - there are ways to use those phrases appropriately, but they can be (and often are) used sarcastically, when the speaker had been clear in the first place.

[-] baronofclubs@lemmy.world 10 points 9 months ago

I'm sorry for not being more clear about how the dishes should be done.

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[-] Mister_Rogers@kbin.social 43 points 9 months ago

"The intent is to provide players with a sense of pride and accomplishment"

[-] bionicjoey@lemmy.ca 40 points 9 months ago

Corporate jingle plays

"And now, a message from our company president..."

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[-] room_raccoon@kbin.social 34 points 9 months ago

My husband's favourite is "I'm sorry you got upset."

[-] peter@feddit.uk 11 points 9 months ago

Companies love that one too. "we are sorry our customers felt upset"

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[-] venoft@lemmy.world 31 points 9 months ago
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[-] Jimmyeatsausage@lemmy.world 26 points 9 months ago

"I'm sorry that you...[took it that way, misunderstood, etc]" basically saying "this is your fault, but I'll apologize anyway"

[-] Extrasvhx9he@lemmy.today 26 points 9 months ago* (last edited 9 months ago)

"Ew do I really have to apologise to it? Fine..."

[-] corvaxL@lemmy.world 23 points 9 months ago
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[-] CleoTheWizard@beehaw.org 23 points 9 months ago

“I’m sorry that you were upset about it”

“I feel like I shouldn’t have to keep apologizing but I will anyways”

“I’m sorry if what I did was misinterpreted”

Or my favorite

“It’s not something that I need to apologize for but if it makes you happy”

[-] son_named_bort@lemmy.world 19 points 9 months ago
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[-] UlyssesT@hexbear.net 18 points 9 months ago

"I'm sorry that you feel that way" smuglord

[-] sunbeam60@lemmy.one 18 points 9 months ago

“IF I’ve offended you, I’m sorry.”

It’s not an apology if you don’t start by agreeing with the other person’s viewpoint.

Instead say: “I can understand why you’re offended. What I didn’t wasn’t acceptable and here’s why: …”

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[-] Darkard@lemmy.world 17 points 9 months ago

You don't really deserve this, but whatever dick head....

[-] user224 10 points 9 months ago

Oh, it's a D. I was wondering what click head is.

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[-] dan1101@lemm.ee 17 points 9 months ago

I am 100% right, but since saying "sorry" is the only way you might shut up...

[-] Im14abeer@midwest.social 15 points 9 months ago

"Even though you .."

[-] CannotSleep420@lemmygrad.ml 14 points 9 months ago

pulls out ukulele

[-] rahmad@lemmy.ml 14 points 9 months ago
[-] tsonfeir@lemm.ee 13 points 9 months ago* (last edited 9 months ago)

I shouldn’t have to apologize, but…

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[-] Ho_Chi_Chungus@hexbear.net 11 points 9 months ago

"My mommy made me write this because you got your fee fees hurt"

[-] Behaviorbabe@kbin.social 11 points 9 months ago

“You’re still upset about that?”

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[-] Chariotwheel@kbin.social 10 points 9 months ago
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[-] neonred@lemmy.world 10 points 9 months ago

"This shouldn't be necessary, but in case you got this wrong, ..."

[-] xX_fnord_Xx@lemmy.world 9 points 9 months ago

'Some Ill informed people may see things your way, but...'

[-] nitefox@sh.itjust.works 8 points 9 months ago

Not understanding what’s wrong, so you can only grasp at why the other person is mad probably making them even angrier

[-] Toneswirly@lemmy.world 8 points 9 months ago

Anything following "I don't know how this happened" is a non-starter. If you don't know, then how can you really be sorry?

[-] swade2569@lemmy.world 8 points 9 months ago

“Before I apologize…”

[-] AceFuzzLord@lemm.ee 7 points 9 months ago

Ya know, I'm not actually sorry, but I'm being forced to apologize. Next time just don't get upset, you cowardly snowflake and I won't have to apologize. Sorry, not actually sorry.

[-] MissJinx@lemmy.world 7 points 9 months ago

"I know I'm not wrong but..."

[-] shinigamiookamiryuu@lemm.ee 7 points 9 months ago

Waiting until it's "water under the bridge" and then apologizing because no amends have to be made and it still makes them look better. I'm no expert on apologies as a Reddit post of mine gives away, but one thing I'm sure of is an apology is supposed to be diplomatic.

Side note, I have decided this is the best way to apologize to me. Nothing else is necessary.

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this post was submitted on 09 Oct 2023
230 points (97.5% liked)

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