this post was submitted on 06 Jul 2026
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xkcd #3268: Offside

Title text:

The arbiter gave my knight a red card for capturing with cleats up :(

Transcript:

Transcript will show once it’s been added to explainxkcd.com

Source: https://xkcd.com/3268/

explainxkcd for #3268

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[–] Nyvios@lemmy.world 13 points 1 day ago (1 children)

You should just call the boss of chess and have your red card withdrawn

[–] SaraTonin@lemmy.world 1 points 17 hours ago

I don’t think Gary Chess, the inventor of chess, is that active in the scene any more. Not for a decade, I don’t think

[–] schnurrito@discuss.tchncs.de 15 points 1 day ago

"Soccer is like chess, just without dice."

(no, this was never a serious quote; "Fußball ist wie Schach, nur ohne Würfel" started as a satirical quote by a German comedian)

[–] cattywampas@lemmy.world 67 points 1 day ago

Spotting offside is very easy once you know how: if an exciting play happens, that's offside.

[–] davidgro@lemmy.world 19 points 1 day ago (2 children)

(patiently waiting for explainxkcd)

[–] thatKamGuy@sh.itjust.works 23 points 1 day ago (2 children)

It’s a football (or soccer, if you’re so inclined) reference.

Overly simplified, the attacking side needs to have one other player besides the opposing goalkeeper in front of the ball to not risk being called off-side.

There is a lot more nuance to the rule, and even I don’t fully understand it 100%, but for the sake of this joke it should suffice.

[–] yermaw@sh.itjust.works 4 points 1 day ago

Now try and explain it to the wife using salt and pepper shakers

[–] doughless@lemmy.world 7 points 1 day ago

The official rule is that you are offside if you are closer to the goal line than both the ball and second-to-last defender when the ball is passed by your own team. It is only a violation if you then make a play toward the ball after being offside. If the other team makes an intentional play on the ball before you do, then you are no longer offside.

[–] ayyy@sh.itjust.works 5 points 1 day ago

Side is off.

[–] VM_Abrantes@lemmy.world 8 points 1 day ago (1 children)
[–] probable_possum@leminal.space 3 points 1 day ago (2 children)

Offside determination requirements

  • time and causality, we need a point in time to check the offside rule - most likely
  • a goal - the king could be seen as kind of a goal
  • at least a 1d coord system to determine if a player is offside - check
  • a penalty zone - debatable
  • players in at least two teams - multiple
  • a ball, that is shot to a player behind the last line of enemy players - No.

No ball, no offside. Chess with a ball could be interesting, though. :)

[–] HeyThisIsntTheYMCA@lemmy.world 2 points 18 hours ago

what are you talking about it's always a ball when you're playing chess

[–] ripcord@lemmy.world 2 points 1 day ago (1 children)

That's the soccer definition not the chess offsides rule

Oh yes. My bad.

[–] SpaceNoodle@lemmy.world 7 points 1 day ago (1 children)

This is a football (soccer) thing, right? Because I think that's the only sport with the cards like that.

[–] Lauchmelder@feddit.org 9 points 1 day ago

this is clearly chess

[–] ShinkanTrain@lemmy.ml -1 points 1 day ago (2 children)

Actually, since it's at the same line as the king or farther, it's not offside

[–] cainisdelta1@sh.itjust.works 4 points 1 day ago (1 children)

Unless the king is equivalent to the goalie in this situation in which case it would be offside

[–] ShinkanTrain@lemmy.ml 1 points 1 day ago

That's what I was referencing

[–] ViatorOmnium@piefed.social 2 points 1 day ago

In football you are offside if you don't have at least two players ahead of you (usually, but not necessarily the keeper and one defender)

A player is in an offside position if:

  • any part of the head, body or feet is in the opponents’ half (excluding the halfway line) and

  • any part of the head, body or feet is nearer to the opponents’ goal line than both the ball and the second-last opponent