7bicycles

made the rounds on twitter today and I have to say, christ alive

I know it's a scripted show, none of it being real.

Still, half of the challenges drip a gallon of oil onto the ground because ha ha Hammonds Car has a leak. Or maybe we just drown one in the british coast line, all fluids in there. Or make a car that cannot be driven safely on public roads, then drive it on public roads.

Especially made worse by the fact that Clarkson complains endlessly about health and safety. I assume, it beeing a BBC-Production, they stuck to it. Which poses the questions of why can you drive the least safe car on public motorways or just dump gallons of oil everywhere and still be compliant. Doesn't seem like Health & Safety really does all that much for Health or Safety.

Just realized I never talked about these. I think these are a gods-end for the urban cyclist. They're panniers that can be converted into a backpack. Pictured here is an Ortlieb Vario PS, but other brands make them - some better than others.

I think they're king for urban cyclists with lots of stops as you can convert them in give or take 3 seconds from one to the other (if you've not bought garbage) and have so much more comfortable carrying capacity compared to classic pannier with a single strap and you can take your valuables with you.

Pictured here is a Red Rebane Exo, allthough across the Pond Surly makes something like this in their Little Dummy Bag line.

Just wanted to throw the knowledge out there that these exist, as they can be a problem solver for some particular situations.

The bike in the title pic is an Urwahn Stadtfuchs, which are 3D-Steel-Printed frames and they do actually look like that. Kind of a hilarious choice to use a high top tube frame for this, I guess the company figures if you're the type of person to transport a guitar like this you also have handlebars lower than the seat instead of using a stepthrough frame.

Instead of saying "thems the breaks", say "thems the rim-brakes".

Instead of saying "I'm stuck between a rock and a hard place", say "I'm stuck between an SUV and also another, larger, SUV"

Instead of saying "as the crow flies", say "as the flying pigeon rides"

Instead of saying "bite the bullet", say "mount the schwalbe marathon"

Instead of saying "Cutting corners", say "cutting corners (on a bicycle)"

Instead of saying "Go back to the drawing board", say "Go back to the bicycle workshop"

Instead of saying "It's not rocket science", say "It's not retrodirect chainline"

Instead of saying "no pain, no gain", say "Don't ride upgrades, ride up grades"

Instead of saying "pull yourself together", say "Pull your peloton together"

Instead of saying "best of both worlds", say "gravel bike"

Instead of saying "don't get bent out of shape," say "don't be a steelframe"

Instead of saying "A penny saved is a penny earned", say "a gram saved is a gram earned"

Instead of saying "A picture is worth 1000 words", say "a pedalstroke is worth 1000 steps"

Instead of saying "Add insult to injury", say "add chainless drive to a vanmoof"

Instead of saying "Don't cry over spilt milk", say "Don't cry over spilt sealant"

Historically, there's a lot of overlap of companies that did bicycles but also guns. It's basically the same "small scale" metallurgy that makes it work. As I've noted too many times before it's odd that in every apocalyptic scenario nobody ever thinks to use a bicycle, it becomes especially egregious once somehow post apocalyptic gunsmithing enters the mix and still no bicycles. That's the same skillset!

Listen just add a can of beans to everything you do. As for flavours? Just colour match, beans are built like that. Easy, cheap, nutritious filling to anything. There isn't anything they don't go with.

"Oh no but I'll get the farts" yeah whatever suffer through it for a week or so while your digestive systems readjusts to actually having nutrients and fiber (unless you have health conditions).

Everytime I look at it in a place I know somewhat well it does include all the nice options for a sunday ride or whatever but it also always shuns more direct routes that are cyclable.

This might be the algorithm giving more weight to greenspace routes but I don't think it's that. It's just data visualitation but in this case this comes with the following problem: nobody but the leisurely sunday-ride people use Gmaps for bicycle navigation in any capacity.

Not knocking that, mind you, but if you're a "serious" touring cyclist you'd get into at least Komoot pretty quick, maybe even standalone biycle GPS. All the everyday transportation cyclists probably just don't use GPS for 99% of their routes because they know the way and there's no point.

Here's where I think it gets carbrained, a lot of people use Gmaps for their commute because it can dynamically route them around congestion or roadblocks. But these things don't apply to bicycles, there is never bicycle congestion and even most roadblocks you can usually just ride or walk through on the pedestrian path or something and even removed from that, considering how hostile to cycling much of the world is you probably don't wanna stray too far from your usual route to just ride along the 6 lane arterial for a while. But they just took the car approach and applied it to bicycle. And sometimes I wonder if people use that as a resource, I mean things like B-Router is deep iceberg cycle pervert shit, and conclude there is no good cycleable route to where they're going and take the car

• Spur Cycle knockoffff
• Crane Bell knockoff
• 3-Tone Bell (never two tone)
• Electronic or air pressure horn
• Clown Horn

That's it, that's the list. Everything else is worthless, especially never buy a Knog Oi.

It's a disco elysium fancam made so well I consider that segment from 1:05 min onwards to be canon because it is so fucking good