this post was submitted on 23 Feb 2026
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My initial thought is video games, everything has pros and cons, sure. However, it feels like anyone not into video games views them extrodinarly negatively. Any other hobbies parallel to that in your opinion?

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[–] blarghly@lemmy.world 8 points 2 days ago (4 children)

Yes.

The difference is between "things that are acceptable to do" vs "things that are acceptable hobbies."

It's like saying "I watch trashy tv as a hobby" - it implies that it takes up a considerable amount of your time, you put a non-negligible amount of effort or money into it, you might be trying to improve at it, or you consider this a significant part of your identity. It isn't just "how you unwind" or "a guilty pleasure" - it is a significant part of your life.

What is the difference between acceptable and unacceptable hobbies? Acceptable hobbies improve the individual engaged in them and the world around them, while unacceptable hobbies degrade the individual and the world around them (as measured by the amorphous cultural consensus of the time). Hence:

Acceptible hobbies:

  • Woodworking
  • Cooking
  • Soccer
  • Dancing
  • Painting
  • Gardening
  • Reading
  • Playing the guitar

These hobbies have the effect of making the individual more active, more social, more creative, and more learned, while also often providing things to others.

Unacceptable hobbies:

  • Watching TV
  • Playing video games
  • Drinking
  • Smoking
  • Gambling

These hobbies have, at best, a neutral effect on the individual or society.

Of course, many here will be offended, and will say "hey, I use gaming as my main form of social interaction with friends who live on the other side of the country - you're making invalid assumptions here!" Well, sure - but this isn't about my personal opinion of gaming. It is about society as a whole's general perception of it. Argue with me all you want - it doesn't change the perception of all of society.

Similarly, many will rightly point out "Hey, that middle aged mom spends hours every day on Candy Crush! I shouldn't be judged any worse than her!" Sure - but again, she doesn't consider Candy Crush to be a hobby. It is just something to kill dead time in her day. She might be an addict - but she isn't admitting it, even to herself.

[–] CanadaPlus 1 points 2 days ago* (last edited 2 days ago) (1 children)

Yeah, but one person's "drinking" is another persons "collecting and curating vintage wines". There's a whole lot of leeway with the "unacceptable" hobbies depending on prestige. Gaming itself has a spectrum there; candy crush isn't really a hobby, a collection of rare arcade machines definitely is.

And I don't necessarily get a great reaction to my productive hobbies, either, if they're not correctly culture coded.

Edit: Somehow me deep diving on Wikipedia doesn't count, but the next person over gets plaudits for trashy novels, because they're on trees. That's a pretty direct inversion.

[–] blarghly@lemmy.world 1 points 2 days ago (1 children)

Yes.

My point wasn't to categorize certain hobbies as necessarily good or bad in a moralistic, but to explain which things are socially acceptable to have as hobbies. I don't decide what is socially acceptable. Society does. I am just observing and explaining my observations.

[–] CanadaPlus 1 points 2 days ago* (last edited 2 days ago) (1 children)

I just don't observe that myself, though.

If that was the way it worked, it would make sense, but in reality it's all about some kind of social pecking order and posing within it.

[–] blarghly@lemmy.world 1 points 1 day ago (1 children)

I mean, if that's the way you want to look at it, go ahead. It doesn't seem like a very friendly world to live in, but you are welcome to it. However, here is how I look at it.

Humans observe other humans. They see humans doing things that are good for themselves and others, and they see humans doing things that are bad for themselves and others. They lump these actions into broad categories with only the necessary nuance needed to live their own personal lives. Then when they hear of a human who greatly values doing things in one of those categories, their interest in interacting more with that human increases or decreases based on their preconcieved notion of the thing. Humans communicate with each other, sharing information. And via communication through all of society, broad cultural consenses emerge about the acceptableness or unacceptableness of being heavily invested in a certain activity.

So the thing to realize is that if you feel like you are often socially rejected when you talk about your hobbies, it may just be that you need to rephrase them, and they will become very interesting to others. For example, if you like reading about history on Wiki, you can say "I like to learn about history", and this might lead to a discussion of horse technology in the Mongol empire or something.

And if someone else says they like reading, but only actually read the most basic trash novels - well whatever. That's not your problem. You are too busy talking about horse mounted archery.

[–] CanadaPlus 1 points 1 day ago

But doesn't being factually correct matter more than being comfortable? (I'm honestly not sure, asking that, whether I'm showing my ass, or if everyone sees it the way I do)

You're right that is based on observation. The prestige of something depends on the wealth, competence and cultural identity of the people seen to be doing it. Great (and now dead and uncontroversial) thinkers through the ages have read paper books. Posh people are depicted enjoying wine, and I've known rich people who like whisky. It's hard to afford rare arcade machines, but anybody can get hooked on candy crush.

For example, if you like reading about history on Wiki, you can say “I like to learn about history”

Yup. People may or may not also enjoy history or whatever else, but it's a valid answer and there's no "wet fart" kind of reaction.

Another one I use is "I like anything that can be learned from a book". It sounds smart, and it's not untrue, since the medium could be either. The fact I don't use paper books very often doesn't come up unless they ask for details, and nobody has to date.

[–] RBWells@lemmy.world 3 points 2 days ago (1 children)

I am into most of those "acceptable hobbies" but would throw reading and gaming into the same bucket. I read, the kids game and both engage your mind. Husband watches TV to unwind and that seems much less mentally engaging to me.

@Korhaka@sopuli.xyz homebrewing to me falls squarely into Cooking category. I also put cocktail making, and any fermentation in cooking. So "drinking" as a hobby isn't necessarily passive, can be creative like cooking. Putting Drinking in unacceptable hobbies, they might as well include Eating. The consuming of it isn't creative but the creation of the food & drink is. Also learning about wine, etc.

[–] blarghly@lemmy.world 6 points 2 days ago

I'd agrue that it is about social perception, not reality. If you say your hobby is reading, everyone assumes you are reading Steinbeck, and if your hobby is gaming, you must be playing COD.

Also, saying "I'm a foodie" is socially acceptable - people might think you're pretentious, but will understand there is a level of intellectual engagement, skill, learning, and exploration that goes into it. If you say "my hobby is eating", on the other hand, they will be a bit nonplussed, and might imagine you taking great pride in eating 200 McNuggets in one sitting. Same with "I like wine tastings" or "I'm a brewer" vs "I like drinking"; or "I like to dance" vs "I go clubbing."

[–] Korhaka@sopuli.xyz 2 points 2 days ago* (last edited 2 days ago) (2 children)

Where does homebrewing using ingredients I grew in my garden sit on the scale of acceptable/unacceptable? Would be nice to get into beekeeping but it looks like the entry costs are quite high for something I have absolutely no idea about. Also my garden is tiny.

[–] btsax@reddthat.com 1 points 2 days ago (1 children)

If you build Warré hives and/or trap your own bees it can be very cheap. Trapping takes patience though and is easier in certain climates.

[–] Korhaka@sopuli.xyz 1 points 1 day ago (1 children)

I don't have a workshop so ability for making things is somewhat limited but might take a look at options. Got a folding saw and that is it for cutting wood, it certainly won't be a perfectly straight cut and I more use it for cutting small branches.

Perhaps it would be possible to come up with something though without spending too much. Trapping the bees does make that free which is rather appealing. Unsure what sort of success rate that would have in my garden.

[–] btsax@reddthat.com 2 points 1 day ago (1 children)

Warré hives are specifically designed to be built with simple tools. I believe a saw and a drill/screwdriver is all you need. Cuts don't need to be perfectly straight and there is no fine woodworking like you need for Langstroth hives with frames.

[–] Korhaka@sopuli.xyz 1 points 1 day ago

I probably should get a drill sometime rather than borrowing it from my partners family.. Do have plenty of screwdrivers though. Then it is just a matter of trapping them.

[–] blarghly@lemmy.world 3 points 2 days ago

I think all these things fall squarely into "socially acceptable".

I think bee keeping is super neat! But as you said, can be expensive. And from what I've heard, can be more difficult than you anticipate due to modern pathogens.

At the end of the day, you should just do what you think is cool and what interests you. But maybe just don't list DOTA on your Hinge profile.