this post was submitted on 02 Mar 2026
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traaaaaaannnnnnnnnns
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Hai everybody! :3
We haven't been around much lately, but we've missed you all <3
As much as we enjoy talking about electromagnetism and the like, we're really feeling trans joy as the theme for this mega post. And we'd love to hear some of the things that have brought you all some joy lately (without doxxing yourselves of course).
Something that is bringing us a lot of joy right now is seeing the local trans community finding each other and making joy for ourselves. They're planning events, going out, finding love and friendship, and refusing to allow our circumstances prevent us from enjoying life and having fun as much as possible. And we're part of it! We've been doing the same! And it doesn't just make this life tolerable in the face of all the bad stuff happening, it's making this life beautiful and filled with love and happiness.
In order to try to get back in the habit of participating here, we're going to try to at least post one bit of trans joy every day here this week.
Join our public Matrix server!
https://rentry.co/tracha#tracha-rooms
As a reminder, please do not discuss current struggle sessions in the mega. We want this to be a little oasis for all of us and the best way to do that is not to feed into existing conflict on the site.
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Thank you terminal.I'm sensitive to abandonment too, funny you bring that up.
My true self is also my darkest feelings, fears, doubts, etc. That's all true- not sure if I act optimisticly though. Hrt is a desperate attempt to not feel like shit. Same with coming out. It's not optimism, it's desperately flailing around to try and help.
I don't like it, I mean obviously it feels like shit, but it's not possible for me to avoid. It is actually hopeless and I do actually hate life. I am ruined, not going to be happy, social shit, you know all of it already.
I don't know what else makes sense for why everyone has left me. I open up, talk about it, and then they get frustrated and leave. Some of them I know have gotten frustrated or burnt out with me. Like, weird that the couple of friends I don't talk about my feelings with are still friends with me but everyone I talk to about this stuff is gone.
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I have OCD and one of the ways you deal with it is a very zen style thing - you have thoughts, you have doubts, you have fears, you have anxieties. But they aren't you. They are clouds, you are the mountain, the clouds come and go and you remain.Its a different way of thinking of your self but I like it! Its kinda dialectical materialist-esque? You aren't mere ideas or passing thoughts, whatever you really are/your true self is what comes closer to defining that is how you act and what you do. You have dark thoughts, doubts, fears, anxieties - but who is eggnog? I see her as a resilient, strong, compassionate, tender, giving woman who has had to deal with a whole of bullshit. She has some dark thoughts and anxieties and fears just like me but how she acts is how she comes across to me.
I wish you had had better friends, though. It is sad to open up to people and share something intense and then for them to leave. Now, I can't say they left because you opened up (I wasn't there) but its sad whether they did or did not.