this post was submitted on 06 Jan 2025
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traaaaaaannnnnnnnnns

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Children of Time is a 2015 science fiction novel by Adrian Tchaikovsky.

In the distant future, humanity seeks to create new habitats for itself on distant planets, terraforming them and seeding them with life. Dr. Avrana Kern is heading one such project, orbiting the tentatively named "Kern's World", where the plan is to release monkeys le-monke infected with a nanovirus that will accelerate their evolution. Through an act of sabotage from an anti-technology group that has also destroyed much of Earth, the monkeys are never released, and the virus instead infects a species of spider, Portia labiata. The book follows the evolution of the spiders and their eventual civilisation, as well as a remnant of humanity that fled to Kern's World hoping to find paradise.


also children of ruin and children of memory, the sequels, are really good


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[โ€“] Yukiko@hexbear.net 15 points 3 months ago

CW: Depression, dysphoriaI have been so godsdamned depressed the last few days that is stemming from some extreme dysphoria that I've been feeling with. And yes, regardless of after having had top and bottom surgery, I am capable of becoming dysphoric. I don't feel genuine. I feel fake. Without having had those experiences I missed on growing up, I feel that I will always be on the outside looking in regardless of what I do. I always see these ciswomen whose experiences I could never emulate and it just kills me on the inside. Yay. I have a vagina, I have breasts, but I'll never have those experiences. It depresses the hell out of me and it is draining the will to live out of me. I hate it so much. Couple that with feeling of not being capable of fitting in with any trans communities for a multitude of reasons. Further couple that with the crushing depression that's on and off since my divorce and I just fucking hate life right now. yay

[โ€“] Tomboymoder@hexbear.net 15 points 3 months ago

I am Godโ€™s eepiest uppy doggirl-sleep

[โ€“] KatGirl@hexbear.net 15 points 3 months ago (4 children)

How do I tell my hairstylist that I want this haircut without showing them this image of a dog girl?

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[โ€“] Wendy_Pleakley@hexbear.net 15 points 3 months ago (1 children)

called the college LGBTQ center

left a voicemail

if this truly is a solo journey then i have to accept that i have nobody. it's just me. it might always be just me.

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[โ€“] bolshevikLovelace@hexbear.net 15 points 3 months ago (3 children)

i hate microsoft if you didn't know cw: dysphoriame: searching Microsoft Teams for a message.
Teams: includes "[deadname] (You) - message" in the results, despite my name being changed in the system and legally for 3 months.

yes, thank you microsoft for giving us pronoun flairs, that only me and like one enby in the company even use lol, but could you not deadname me? you are valued at 3.16 trillion USD and you can't amend (or can't be fucked amending) my name within a system you have almost complete control of. sometimes i see my deadname email flicker before being replaced with my new one and i can understand why they might have my old email but why are you storing my deadname???? is my legal name just a display name?? lea-dysphoric

i'm soooo fucking glad microsoft successfully abused their market power to eradicate slack and make us use this steaming pile of bland corpo dogshit. i throw up a little everytime i hear that fucking teams ping, i reaaaally want to quit just because of our dependence on this repugnant company

i know this comes off a bit trivial, i'm privileged to have an office job. but it gives off the same vibe as my birth certificate having "previously known as [deadname]", both constant reminders that i'll never be just me but me who used to be someone else and that shit sucks

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[โ€“] bolshevikLovelace@hexbear.net 15 points 4 months ago

i have the irresistible urge to be gay AND to do crime... i wonder what that's about

spoilergayroller-2000

[โ€“] Tommasi@hexbear.net 15 points 3 months ago (2 children)

I tried playing marvel rivals with some friends and its kinda fun, but also reminded me why I stopped playing those types of games: so many people who can't take a loss without getting insanely mad doggirl-sweat The absurdity of it is kinda funny when it happens, but it creates such a negative environment where i don't want to spend that much time tbh

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[โ€“] Eco@hexbear.net 15 points 3 months ago (3 children)

does anyone have tips for a gnome infestation. i tried publicly crucifying one to send a message but they seem to have founded a religion instead

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[โ€“] EstraDoll@hexbear.net 15 points 3 months ago (2 children)

secretly kind of hoping that Donald Trump will be too busy thining about invading Greenland and/or Canada that he'll be too busy to do anything terrible for trans people

[โ€“] SadArtemis@hexbear.net 14 points 3 months ago

Fingers crossed, and hopefully Canada will be too busy thinking of Trump's impending invasion for the next likely PM (Poilievre) to do the same as well.

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[โ€“] LocalOaf@hexbear.net 14 points 4 months ago

Got some neat stuff thrifting

Kinda wish I could post pics because some of the clothes are really cute imo and I actually found stuff that (mostly) fit me

Found some nice gym stuff too, got a pair of fancy tech wear sweatpants that make my legs and butt look good meow-bounce

Got some cute plushies my cats have been enjoying too and a street hockey stick for playing cat hockey in the house and that's been fun

Bless whatever tall/large femme donated the shiny windbreaker and hoodie with the faux fur hood lining and sleeve cuffs, think it might be my favorite dysphoria hoodie now despite it being a little short on the torso and sleeves

Might hem it to a crop top or elbow length sleeves and wear it as a summer night kinda layer later but it's really cute imo in a "sporty goth (queer)" kinda way and I'm kinda in love with it

sicko-fem

[โ€“] Wmill@hexbear.net 14 points 3 months ago

Richard and Mortimer was quite good for it's run, I especially like when one half of the titular characters turned themselves into a pickle. Had the series continued perhaps that scallywag Richard could have transformed some more possibly into a woman, they might have finally been happy. Alas with the cancellation by the Woke Council with the show's association with the Ronald McDonald corporation we shall never see this possibility.

[โ€“] LocalOaf@hexbear.net 14 points 3 months ago (1 children)

mental health, social isolation sad shit, avpd probablyI really gotta get my shit together mentally and get over my "what if it doesn't go well" woe is me bullshit and reach out to my old best friend who might be the (platonic?) love of my life or soulmate or something

I miss this person so fucking much and have for years now and at some point when shit got really bad for me when covid got serious here, I just completely shut down and isolated and retreated inward mentally and have just started tiptoeing back to being "myself" but I've thought of this friend pretty much constantly since then and I know reconnecting with them would be like, the single best thing I could do for myself but it's still so scary and daunting after all this time

I thought by now I'd finally be, like, me, fully, and could reconnect as a better version of the person they loved, but I feel more weird and fucked up and unhappy with myself now than I did when we were super close irl and part of what's been preventing me from reaching back out is that feeling of shame

I wish I could be better at the very least so they could feel better about me instead of being concerned or upset at what a mess I am

Idk sorry I'm really emotional tonight

catgirl-cry catgirl-flop

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[โ€“] Thallo@hexbear.net 14 points 3 months ago (4 children)

I just finished My Lesbian Experience with Loneliness after it's been sitting in my library for half a year

Aaaaaaah, I love queer people so much โค๏ธ

I love our fucked up weird little lives~

I want to huuuug you โœจ

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[โ€“] Tommasi@hexbear.net 14 points 4 months ago
[โ€“] LocalOaf@hexbear.net 14 points 4 months ago

bad mental health, meltdown, alcoholKinda snapped last night and had a little violent meltdown and feel bad about it and embarrassed by how fucking juvenile and pathetic it was

I don't even really remember what triggered it

I ate some dinner and got drunk but not like, sloppy drunk and it was all pretty normal and like the next thing I knew something in me kinda snapped and I was out in the garage beating the shit out of a spare door that's propped up against the shelves out there absolutely raging and yelling

Bruised my hand pretty bad but I don't think I broke anything thankfully but jfc

Gonna commit to no booze now, that's never really happened to me before, I've always been more of either a "aww I love you" drunk or a maudlin kinda ruminating drunk, never an angry one and that kinda scared the shit out of me

Like, how long was that building up for? How much more shit like that is just lurking in the back of my head festering? (I know I'm a big gymrat but for the record, no, I'm not on gear, so it's not roid rage)

Idk, fuck

This shit sucks ass

I'm way too old for feeling like a ridiculous angsty teenager

[โ€“] yewler@hexbear.net 14 points 3 months ago (1 children)

Well my winter break is coming to an end and I must say I did not miss having to deal with Microsoft teams

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[โ€“] Eco@hexbear.net 14 points 3 months ago

every single person who's ever protested the building of new homes because it'll lower house prices should have their house confiscated and given to someone who doesn't suck

[โ€“] yewler@hexbear.net 14 points 3 months ago

Someone just called me a nerd and I don't think I can mentally recover from that

[โ€“] MoonElf@hexbear.net 14 points 4 months ago (7 children)
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[โ€“] Eco@hexbear.net 14 points 3 months ago (3 children)

it makes me happy whenever i see capybara in hot springs. they deserve all the love and goodness in the world

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[โ€“] CommunistCuddlefish@hexbear.net 13 points 3 months ago* (last edited 3 months ago) (2 children)

I LOVE THIS BOOK

I LOVE THIS BOOK

I LOVE THIS BOOK

I WANT LARGE SENTIENT SPIDER BUDDIES

IT'S SUCH A CUTE BOOK AND IT'S SO WHOLESOME

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[โ€“] Eco@hexbear.net 13 points 4 months ago

why is olympic swimming pool a measurement people use. all i know is they're big. i've never swum in one

[โ€“] Tommasi@hexbear.net 13 points 4 months ago (3 children)

I try to dress well no matter what I do, (I have low self-confidence, but knowing I look the best I can do helps a ton) but the last couple of days have been so cold that shapeless bundle of cloth have been the only viable option. I hate winter madeline-stare

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[โ€“] Wmill@hexbear.net 13 points 3 months ago (3 children)

My checklist for mental health are make sure I'm clean shaven, paint my nails, and finally epilate. If I can do 2/3 I feel fine usually but feeling bleh so might push myself to do the last one. Just gonna procrastinate first and get some reading done or whatev

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[โ€“] Eco@hexbear.net 13 points 3 months ago (4 children)
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