To be clear, every post and user I removed was due to queerphobia, transphobia, trolling or spam, issues that broke the instances rules. Some of that bigotry was was implicit rather than explicit, like dog whistles, tone policing etc. Some of it was the “just asking questions” transphobia that pervades most corporate owned social media spaces.

This is the way I have moderated this instance from before the time I handed this community to moss. When lemmy was just taking off, I asked for people to mod the 196 community after it was abandoned by its original creators, and passed it over to moss when she raised her hand.

So if the goal is for this to be civil, maybe don’t paint me as the bad guy for moderating in a way I have done from before your community was created here. What feels like “moderating by vibes” to you, is lengthy experience with community development, and a decade navigating queer and gender diverse communities, and knowing what I want from them. As moss said, this is ideological differences in how low grade transphobia and queerphobia should be dealt with. moss is ok with community pushback for the low grade stuff rather than moderation, whereas I’ll just remove it.

That’s what I wouldn’t compromise on, and that has been the way the instance has run for years now.

It feels like every time I extend 196 a hand, you bite it. I gave the community to moss and started this whole thing. I told another instance admin no when they asked 196 to remove their banner. moss then went and leaked the DMs from said admin, forcing me to remove the post, and then had a public complaint session about me for removing the post.

I have asked 196 for years now to have an active blahaj.zone mod so that someone can deal with the blahaj.zone reports that constantly come through and build up, but still, the best we got were mods with alt accounts that get checked every couple of days, leaving me to deal with the build up of reports on 196. Sometimes they would hang around there for days while I waited for a 196 mod to log in and look at them. And because you don’t like the way I deal with them, you drag me over the coals for my moderation style, despite no one from 196 stepping up to deal with those reports on a regular basis.

I was told that you were thinking about moving to another instance. I offered my support if you decided to stay or to leave. And that was the last I heard of it, until one of your mods (possibly you if I remember correctly) told the community you were organising something with lemmy.world, and I had to hear that second hand. And then, when things were finalised and the decision to move was locked in, once more, I heard about it second hand, after your team made a public post, because no one from 196 could be bothered to tell me before posting.

So no, you don’t get to paint me as the unreasonable admin who moderates by “vibes”. If you want to point the finger at me, at least own your own mistakes, rather than asking for good will and civility and then dumping on me when the chance presents itself.