Frodo was Gandalf's chicken. Realistically, how much damage to Middle Earth can one evil hobbit cause?
Edit: Just saw the title.
this post was submitted on 29 Apr 2025
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Gandalf corrupted by the Ring would be a really interesting what-if scenario.
Would love to see it. Wouldn't be mass conquest I think, but more knowledge conquest. That ring can't hold up to Hobbit weed man.
Same as Galadriel, he would march into Mordor and replace Sauron.
Gandalf with the ring would have a good chance of being able to defeat Sauron, but Galadriel would not. Maiar beats elf.
In place of a Dark Lord, you would have a hen! Not dark, but round and orange as the dawn sun! Loud as the sea! Scratching and pecking even to the foundations of the earth! All shall love me, and despair!
Scratching and pecking even to the foundations of the earth
"But also it was her destruction: For she pecked too greedily and too deep..."
There was Eru, the One, who in Arda is called Ilúvatar; and he made first the chickens, the Holy Ones, that were the offspring of his thought, and they were with him before aught else was made.
I came here to find this. Ty!
The flaming eye on top of Barad-dûr is now a chicken eye.
Clearly this someone who has never had to deal with an aggressive rooster.
What about using a Capybara
Capy turns evil. Capy is too chill to care. Hot spring time.
Every few years around here there appears somebody stupid enough to insist on petting wild capybaras. That's something you can only try once.
I had fighting cocks. I meant not only were they bred for it they had experience. Still not as bad as people make chickens out to be.
Sure the cats didn't fuck with em much.
Isn't that illegal in many places?
Not OP, but I suspect the aforementioned chickens might have been rescued.
Ah, good point. Given the other... uses we have for chickens, it hadn't occurred to me that "chicken rescue" would be a thing, but it probably is.
It likely would not have occurred to me, either, but I have recently befriended another Lemmy user who has pet chickens. He has considerably expanded my perspective on my matter.
I'm actually a bit surprised he hasn't made an appearance in this thread (that I've seen, anyway).
Hah, I bet its southsamurai, I've also seen him around talking about his chicken(s?). I've never considered having a chicken before but now it's on my mind.
Part of me wants to try and adopt a raccoon but I know I wouldn't be a good parent to such a mischievous little gremlin. A regular puppy is enough for me.
It is indeed. It's fun that Lemmy is still that small. Besides his interest in chickens, he also has a very recognizable tone - I've seen him talk about comics, for example, and realized it was him before I looked at the username.
I have no advice about raccoons, but I wish I did.
Yeah. I think its illegal here too. (Laws dont really matter here, just do what you wanna honestly)
Yeah you can call em rescues, we obviously didnt make em participate since we got em (or any of their next generations), although did cook em up later.
PH?
Nope. Pakistan
The chicken would have turned invisible as a wraith pretty quickly, and I bet it would have been powerful enough to escape the leash
Also, the Ring was trying to get back to its master. If it realized the chicken wasn't corruptible, it would have abandoned the chicken at the first chance it got.
Assuming that animals are corruptible, what animal would the ring go for if humanoids weren't an option?
A goose? Could fly the ring to Sauron
Are you suggesting evil rings migrate?
Maybe they used Gondorian or Arnorian swallows
depends on if a single ring counts as laden or unladen
Laden if unequipped. Unladen if equipped.
Based on it just sitting on a stream bed for thousands of years after isildur was killed gotta at least have more intelligence than a fish.
Had Isildur been slain by the sea or around a mangrove, a crab would've picked the ring. Rise, Evil Craubron, servant of the Dark Lord
the Ring is treacherous and may just dissapear by itself.
This guy never played Zelda...
Bro hasn't played Runescape, evil chicken is no joke
What if he dragged it along behind him on a long string, instead of... you know... right up against his chest.
"Meat's back on the menu, boys" hits different in this timeline...
(Yes, I know that Taking the Chickens to Isengard is noncanonical in other ways...)
Surely Boromir would have killed the chicken and run off? Frodo only escaped him because the ring was right there on his person.
Ok, someone needs to write this book. Seriously.