this post was submitted on 06 May 2025
291 points (97.1% liked)

Shitty Life Pro Tip

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Welcome,

To a place for the shittiest, most mocking "pro-tips" you can think of. This Community is welcome to anything shitty pro-tip related, such as memes, discussing the best shitty tip, and much more.


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1_Don't spam, post must be related to community topic

2_Do not seek mental, medical or professional help here. This is not the place, community is meant for satire.

3_No tip should be taken serious

4_No tip should single out a person

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7_For posts related to SLPTs, but not a tip please use "[META]" tag

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top 31 comments
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[–] jordanlund@lemmy.world 56 points 1 month ago (2 children)

12:00 and blinking 12:00 are not the same. :)

[–] OldManBOMBIN@lemmy.world 33 points 1 month ago (1 children)

Just close your eyes every half-second

[–] kriz@slrpnk.net 31 points 1 month ago (1 children)

Oh so you're one of those ppl obsessed with frame rates

[–] OldManBOMBIN@lemmy.world 7 points 1 month ago

What? I don't wear glasses. :-D

[–] kriz@slrpnk.net 10 points 1 month ago (1 children)

Blinking is superior. Without blinking, you could be staring for up to a minute at the clock unsure if time is moving or even if it exists. Theblink immediately tells you that time is working.

[–] dumblederp@aussie.zone 6 points 1 month ago

Blinking uses half the power too.

Tip also works for car battery / clock.

[–] rumba@lemmy.zip 19 points 1 month ago (5 children)

House came with a builtin over/microwave combo.

Ohh wifi option... FUCK THAT... NO FUCKING WAY I'LL ADD THIS POS TO MY WIFI

Clock is WAY wrong, scroll through settings and update it to the second.

Next day, Clock is off by 1m... maybe I didn't do it right

Next day, Clock is off by 2m

Next day, 3 minutes, jesus that's a lot of drift.

OK fuck this thing, go through settings to turn the clock off.

THERE IS NO SETTING FOR THAT

So I can:

A. Leave the clock ever wrong where it'll be right like once ever couple months

B. Set the clock every couple days

C. Create a internet only + isolation VLAN and put this POS into it.

[–] kriz@slrpnk.net 30 points 1 month ago (1 children)

Simple fix: use a strip of electrical tape over your eyes

[–] rumba@lemmy.zip 5 points 1 month ago

that's the REAL slpt

[–] alekwithak@lemmy.world 7 points 1 month ago* (last edited 1 month ago) (1 children)

D. Tape a small mirror to the clock display, then set up a working clock across from it. Then learn to read mirrored numbers. Easy.

[–] rumba@lemmy.zip 3 points 1 month ago

The clock is also the touchscreen that operates the microwave. I could maybe put a flap of black cloth over the screen and only lift it when I wanted to use it.

it's really horrible.

Side note, wonder if anyone makes a clockwork that goes backward.

[–] noxypaws@pawb.social 7 points 1 month ago (1 children)

I wonder if the clock is intentionally that bad as a way to annoy its ~~victims~~ users into giving it an internet connection

[–] rumba@lemmy.zip 4 points 1 month ago

it might be, but the interface is also slow as balls

First you hit microwave (because it operates both the mirowave AND the oven

The chime is instant but the menu load, that takes a good 700 ms

then you press cook, there's a menu of 4 items which are all just cook with extra steps. that's another 700ms and a 50% chance of not registering your click.

you get a horizontal two line number pad 1-5, 6-0 with a little hit box in the lower left for power

you enter in 90 for seconds, and click power (optional)

i shit you now, power is a scrolling slider, you swipe left and right to up up and down by 10%

micro->cook->9 0 -> power -> swipe90, ->swipe 80, swipe 70, swipe 60, swipe 50, swipe 40 -> next -> start

The other menus are worse, it starts asking you questions about the thing it's defrosting, satisfying some form of flow chart inside to do a lookup of power and time.

the only good thing I can say about it, it' has a proper popcorn button that stops early when the corn stops popping. It's never burned a bag or left extra kernels.

[–] greyhathero@lemmy.world 5 points 1 month ago (2 children)

get a smart plug and power cycle every night at midnight

[–] rumba@lemmy.zip 3 points 1 month ago (1 children)

Fuck, it's 220 50amp ... But that's not impossible.... Take my upvote

[–] dumblederp@aussie.zone 1 points 1 month ago (1 children)
[–] rumba@lemmy.zip 2 points 1 month ago

I probably marry an ESP 32 to an industrial relay. Let my home assistant handle it because it's time from actual time servers.

The only problem I could think that would need to be handled is if I were having to be trying to cook something at midnight. Maybe detect power on the line, If it's wrong more than standby current cancel the restart for the day.

[–] TJDetweiler@lemmy.ca 2 points 1 month ago

And then the smart plug begins to time drift....

No big deal, just set the time back to midnight every few days. Problem solved.

[–] Mouselemming@sh.itjust.works 3 points 1 month ago

If by some miracle the clock is not also the timer display, you could use the Klick&Klack method.

[–] chrisbtoo@lemmy.world 13 points 1 month ago* (last edited 1 month ago)

Why would you do it at noon? It should be midnight.

Edit: duh, I realise now it's a shitty LPT.

[–] yesman@lemmy.world 9 points 1 month ago (1 children)

I don't understand why this attitude persists now that VCRs are gone. If you've never set up the time and record time on a 6digit LCD, then you don't know the struggle.

[–] Snowwomen@discuss.tchncs.de 8 points 1 month ago (1 children)

At least on VCRs you could enter the time with the digit buttons on the remote. Whereas on digital alarm clock/wristwatch, if you hold the time up button a split second too long, you roll past the actual time and have to try again.

[–] yesman@lemmy.world 4 points 1 month ago

Remote? I'm talking about flipping that little door to expose the same control scheme that cheap monitors use.

[–] Psythik@lemm.ee 9 points 1 month ago (1 children)

Most digital clocks default to midnight, actually.

[–] tal@lemmy.today 4 points 1 month ago (1 children)

That's fine as long as you want a clock showing the timezone on the opposite side of the world.

[–] Tangent5280@lemmy.world 6 points 1 month ago

Or alternatively you could travel to where it is accurate, plug it in and then come back home

[–] pineapplelover@lemm.ee 6 points 1 month ago* (last edited 1 month ago) (1 children)

Real LPT, if you get a clock, get one with radio syncing functionality so it will automatically get the time. My wrist watch does this and it's cool

[–] some_guy 2 points 1 month ago

I have to replace my atomic clock because the radio sync stopped working. It's like fifteen years old, so I can't complain.

[–] some_guy 4 points 1 month ago

This is the best slpt I've ever seen.

[–] lemming741@lemmy.world 2 points 1 month ago

Trip your main breaker, and turn it back on at 11:59

[–] nucleative@lemmy.world 2 points 1 month ago

Plug it in?