this post was submitted on 04 Jun 2025
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[–] tetris11@lemmy.ml 11 points 1 week ago

I helped a lady with a baby stroller up a flight of stairs today and did my back in. She thanked me and I limped home holding back tears.

So, 7 I think

[–] MeatPilot@lemmy.world 11 points 1 week ago* (last edited 1 week ago) (1 children)

#1 looks like he was going in for a handshake and someone misinterpreted it and brained him.

"Fuck dude, I was just trying to say hi"

[–] tetris11@lemmy.ml 1 points 1 week ago* (last edited 1 week ago)

"Ah well you see, there's your mistake right there; instead of your hand you used your sword."

[–] classic@fedia.io 7 points 1 week ago

Man, they really mostly took mortal injuries in stride

6, consistently, for 2 months

[–] RBWells@lemmy.world 7 points 1 week ago

6 looks like a migraine feels.

[–] FardyCakes@lemmy.world 6 points 1 week ago (1 children)
[–] toomanypancakes@lemmy.world 4 points 1 week ago

It's definitely a 5 kinda day.

[–] ininewcrow@lemmy.ca 6 points 1 week ago* (last edited 1 week ago)

#8. .. Excuse me sir, but please stop stabbing my baby and throwing severed heads in my general direction

Kinda funky how many of them are just stabbed straight through the skull. That would be no easy feat. Anyway, #5. A solid axe swing.

[–] HexesofVexes@lemmy.world 4 points 1 week ago

Solid six - I've picked up something nasty and it's giving me a horrific headache!

[–] TachyonTele@lemm.ee 4 points 1 week ago

I can't tell which ones a school bus :/

[–] hakunawazo@lemmy.world 4 points 1 week ago
[–] ApathyTree@lemmy.dbzer0.com 4 points 1 week ago* (last edited 1 week ago) (1 children)

I’m usually 5. I have a lot of uncomfortable physical issues, but I’ve learned to find positives in life where they are, and just roll with things I have no control over.

[–] MajorMajormajormajor@lemmy.ca 2 points 1 week ago

"Guess I'll die now, too awkward to resist."

[–] MJKee9@lemmy.world 4 points 1 week ago* (last edited 1 week ago)

I think they are out of order. #s 4, 5 and 6, should definitely be higher. I think 7 is way too high. He's just dealing with a stomach wound... Sure..he's going to die a horrible death from sepsis in a few days BUT that's just an excuse for a milk of poppy bender. That's the face of a man ready to Par-tay!

[–] cathfish@lemmy.world 3 points 1 week ago (1 children)
[–] OrteilGenou@lemmy.world 2 points 1 week ago
[–] SassyRamen@lemmy.world 3 points 1 week ago

Maybe #2, idk I'm really beside myself on this one

3, in a fairly chipper mood today.

Oh an absolute 9 but with the facial expression of 2.

  1. Keep getting stabbed but I got shit to do.
[–] NigelFrobisher@aussie.zone 2 points 1 week ago

Literally me.

[–] KhanLee@lemmy.zip 2 points 1 week ago
[–] milicent_bystandr@lemm.ee 2 points 1 week ago

6 and 7 are from the book of Judges in the Bible; a bit older than medieval!