796
Congrats! Here, I got this for you:
this post was submitted on 02 Feb 2026
796 points (99.4% liked)
Lemmy Shitpost
37580 readers
4164 users here now
Welcome to Lemmy Shitpost. Here you can shitpost to your hearts content.
Anything and everything goes. Memes, Jokes, Vents and Banter. Though we still have to comply with lemmy.world instance rules. So behave!
Rules:
1. Be Respectful
Refrain from using harmful language pertaining to a protected characteristic: e.g. race, gender, sexuality, disability or religion.
Refrain from being argumentative when responding or commenting to posts/replies. Personal attacks are not welcome here.
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2. No Illegal Content
Content that violates the law. Any post/comment found to be in breach of common law will be removed and given to the authorities if required.
That means:
-No promoting violence/threats against any individuals
-No CSA content or Revenge Porn
-No sharing private/personal information (Doxxing)
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3. No Spam
Posting the same post, no matter the intent is against the rules.
-If you have posted content, please refrain from re-posting said content within this community.
-Do not spam posts with intent to harass, annoy, bully, advertise, scam or harm this community.
-No posting Scams/Advertisements/Phishing Links/IP Grabbers
-No Bots, Bots will be banned from the community.
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4. No Porn/Explicit
Content
-Do not post explicit content. Lemmy.World is not the instance for NSFW content.
-Do not post Gore or Shock Content.
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5. No Enciting Harassment,
Brigading, Doxxing or Witch Hunts
-Do not Brigade other Communities
-No calls to action against other communities/users within Lemmy or outside of Lemmy.
-No Witch Hunts against users/communities.
-No content that harasses members within or outside of the community.
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6. NSFW should be behind NSFW tags.
-Content that is NSFW should be behind NSFW tags.
-Content that might be distressing should be kept behind NSFW tags.
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If you see content that is a breach of the rules, please flag and report the comment and a moderator will take action where they can.
Also check out:
Partnered Communities:
1.Memes
10.LinuxMemes (Linux themed memes)
Reach out to
All communities included on the sidebar are to be made in compliance with the instance rules. Striker
founded 2 years ago
MODERATORS
Aww, I’m touched! You shouldn’t have… no really, I don’t think this will fit up there.
Glad you're here!
Those weekly submissions to the admins are a pain. I'm running out of ideas.
I’m glad you are here as well!
As far as the nudes go, I started doing art periods and genres. Impressionism, cubism, surrealism, abstraction… my butthole has many iterations.
... stool samples?
... kinda difficult to ship physically, but we could all just literally provide a daily shit post, just so you know how regular we all are, potentially screen for internal bleeding or a few conditions.
Eating beans while trying not to poop is the ultimate challenge.
While I'm sad lemm.ee shutdown, I'm kinda relieved I don't have to send those admins my used underwear monthly anymore. Lemmy.zip only requires feet pics once to join.
Feet pics once? That’s a bargain. I hope you got a pedicure for your submission!
Which instance should I join if I just lost half a big toenail? Surely someone's into that...
are you single? 🫦
Happily married but will send feet pics for the right price.
Shame. I'll send you 2 cans full of beans for the feet tho
I’ll take cannellini! Get ready, big boy…
😍
Thank you for your service 🫘
Glad to be here!
You’re a Lemmy cornerstone. We need more contributors like you!
Also shoutout to all the bean lovers. 🫘
Thank you! 🫘 forever!
I didn't understand her bean reference and I'm scrolling down the comments trying to figure it out and it's still pretty cryptic down here.
I think it started with this:
https://sh.itjust.works/post/715364
Ah what an obscure reference from 3 years ago, and apparently I saw it 3 years ago because I had already upvoted it & a bunch of comments 3 years ago 🤣
The pie 🥧
Your profile says you only have 5.5k! 
Hmmm I wonder why?
Must be calculated differently on boost.
My bad, carry on. But I'm watching you 🧐.
But I'm watching you 🧐
( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)
Maybe there's posts on instances you're not federated with or in communities you've blocked?
For me it shows 5.9k using Voyager on Sopuli.
Strange.
Well done. You may take a day off to ponder your orb.
Thank you. The orb will be pondered.
Those are rookie numbers
(This is in jest, what I post takes less effort)
HOT ICKPLANT EATING BEANS
i'm impressed
Your pocket beans are leaking.
Coming up with creative titles to posts is hard
Really appreciate the effort. Seen your posts on several communities and I've always enjoyed your content. I always look forwards to your bats and opposum submissions!
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(1 replies)
learning how not to poop for 3 days with you guys!
So is this:
- A) spending a period of 3 days mastering the art of mastering your bowls
- B) spending that 6000-post-long period learning how to only poop every 3 days
- C) spending that 6000-post-long period learning how to not poop for a period of 3 days at a time
Either way, I would like to be pointed to the source of this knowledge.
It looks like the original post is gone, but there was a guy 2.5 years ago who asked how to avoid pooping for 3 days. It generated a lot of buzz and was the first big insider meme that appeared on Lemmy to my knowledge.
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(4 replies)
https://lemmy.world/post/616615
I need to survive for 3 days without pooping, and eating as little as possible. I can pee, but not very often. It can't take up too much space. What food do I pack? - Lemmy.world
Please don’t ask why I need this. It would be great if the food also made me sweat less. It has to be something I can easily find. EDITS FOR CLARIFICATION: - I am not planning on partaking in any illegal activities. - I do not condone the use of illegal substances and am not planning on smuggling anything anywhere. - I am not going on a hiking trip or mailing myself anywhere. - I will be staying in a tent (not a small one; a huge with with air conditioning and everything). I will be traveling for five days, returning to my current location on day 3 and traveling again on the last two days. I will not poop on the first three days (hopefully). - Clean toilets with all the expected facilities will be available to me. I am not going to poop for reasons that I wish to keep to myself. - If it gets bad, like really bad, like a-piece-of-poop-is-literally-halfway-out-my-ass bad, I will use the toilets. Please stop asking because I am not telling anyone the reason.
Thank you dearly and sincerely for saving the text. I thought it was gone forever after OP deleted their post (internet terrorism imo). Last i saw the comment section was still kicking around, but without being able to see the question.
Should be in a best of archive and saved for posterity. The set up was important, but the comment section was the best sleuthing around. Would love to know if it actually was the haj.
You made me curious what my own post count was, apparently 4,834 in the past 8 months.
I wonder how many this account has over the full 3 years without the PieFed reset.
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