No Stupid Questions

You shouldn't care about their opinions of your personal habits.

They look at you funny:
"Fuck off werido. This is how normal people eat pizza."

What should I NOT do in front of rich people?

Care what out of touch rich fucks think.

What should I NOT do in front of rich people?

Diminish yourself or your self worth

Don't envy them. They can't even hold pizza

Rich people don't care how you eat your pizza. Stuck up people do, but you get plenty of those without money.

Rich people don't like it when you believe in socialism or progressive tax rates.

The trick is to not care, and to confidently do it like it was the most natural thing in the world, and it clearly was.

The world of the wealthy runs on appearances. The worst thing you can do there is to be ashamed. Arguably better is to look at them with confident disdain for using a knife and fork to eat a pizza, in much the same way that they might for someone using a soup spoon for dessert.

For the pizza, it's arguably more regional than wealth related. In a few countries, like parts of Italy and Sweden, it's more common to eat pizza using cutlery rather than using your hands.

Whereas for other places, like other parts of Italy, it may be more common to use your hands for it instead. It very much depends on where, and the local culture more than anything else. But using your hands is as valid as using a knife and fork.

Knife and fork for pizza?! Did they not wash their hands or something? That sounds like something only the insane would do

IDK, be poor probably. And I bet they hate it if you talk about seizing the means of production and eating the rich.

If you see people eating pizza with a fork you mock them. I didn't care if its your best friend, mother, or the goddamn Pope. Although the current Pope is from Chicago so he knows better than to eat pizza with a fork like some kind of filthy degenerate.

When you're sufficiently rich, you don't even have to care about what the regular rich people think.

You can probably adopt the habit even before you manage to reach that level of wealth

Why worry about the opinions of people who eat pizza with a fork‽

You do not need to impress the clods who eat pizza with flatware. These people would eat a sandwich with flatware if someone "more important" did it.

Don't worry about it. Anyone that eats pizza with a knife and fork is a fucking idiot.

Yeah should just grab it with your mouth, don’t use your hands

Have your gazpacho warmed.

Act like they’re your superiors. They bleed and die just like poor people

you should probably not hock-up a nice big loogie, then swish it around your mouth for a minute like you're at a fine wine tasting event, then swallow it in one big, noisy GULP.

Don't be embarrassed or insecure. They probably envy you, getting to dig in with your hands.

Zerosophisto. . . Sophistication robs the world of culture. There is no "supposed to be like" in an adult world where you are not harming others with the choices you make. There is (and should not be) just one way to "be". Some rich people feel like they have it all figured out because they have money. Money does not equal happiness. Do what makes you happy and move through the world with grace.

One of the ballinest moves I ever saw was the hired band at the high-end corporate executive event where I was the cocktail waitress playing "Sixteen Tons". And not just playing it, singing it.

The decorative nooses the men have around their necks are not for pulling. Usually.

People who still live in caves, they eat with their bare hands.

(and Us americans, of course)

Giving a fuck about how you eat pizza.

I swear I looked like a bum when I grabbed a slice of pizza with my hands

I used to eat pizza with chopsticks lmfao.

I remember eating pizza with the spork thingy in school and I feel like a fucking weirdo lmfao.

As for the question: Make sure you DO NOT FORGET TO

🎵 SHIT ON THE FLOOR 🎵

RIGHT IN FRONT OF THEM

THEN THROW THE SHIT AT THEIR FACE

And make sure it get it on livestream, it'll become the most famous video of the 21st century

WTF?!?! Were you hanging out at Mar-a-lago or something?

PEOPLE WHO EAT PIZZA WITH A KNIFE AND FORK ARE ACTUAL ALIENS

Fried chicken, too. Don't gulp, slurp. Chew with your mouth closed. Napkin in lap, elbows off table. Walk slowly and not hunched over. Look at military posture of head and shoulders. Two sentences, then a question. Cutlery use starts outside and works inward. Don't saw to cut food, don't cut more than two bites at a time, no more than a couple of cm (half inch) in size. Don't cross your legs unless it's at the ankle. No more than two glasses of wine, beer, one mixed drink.

not care about their opinion

Next time, laugh in their fucking face while you scarf down a whole pie. They aren't better than you, in any way. 99.99% chance they're just luckier (which could always change).

In front of rich people you shouldn't blow your nose without a tissue and then simply throw the snot down on the ground.