Some rich jack off gets caught in a scandal. 2 months later he’s on the Christian shopping channels telling how he’s finally found the lard. Like ffs how many times do we have see this episode again?
this post was submitted on 08 Mar 2026
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Reminds me of the story of the father/pastor who raped his daughter, and was given a slap on the wrist 60 day jail sentence for, according to the judge, being a "good christian man".
Which, like... what part of raping a child makes you a good christian man? Smells like to me the judges home PC probably has sexual images of children on it.
No, to the Christians, it's not "raping a child" it's "sex with underage women/females/etc..."
In their religion, it was totally normal to ~~have sex with~~ rape children, even and especially when it's their own child.
its just disgusting how short time ago it was legal, accepted and even encouraged.
My grandmother was sold off at like 13 to a man 4x her age to marry. and she, to this day, sees nothing wrong with it.
Which is especially wild, cause if you told her about that being done to a kid today, she'd be enraged by it.
If you are rich.
My father went from barefoot hippy to sportcoat-wearing, Champaign-sipping millionaire by saying "Jesus" a lot to a lot of wealthy people. Most of that money went up his nose over a couple decades and he died broke and alone, but for a time I got to see how the wealthy live.
(It's a lot of hedonism and drugs, so, so much drugs.)
Just being rich seems to work pretty well.
I mean, compare the rich abusers in the Epstein files and the blue collar workers who raped Gisèle Pelicot. Who went to prison? Exactly.
Everyone one of those men deserve castration. Poor woman.
Kash Patel is a fine fucking example.
What if you say, "JESUS FUCKING CHRIST!" a lot? Does that count?
Edit: Wait. I just remembered. I'm not rich.
If only I could find someone who would pay me a lot of money to say "Jesus".
The church figured it out. Get the money from poor people. Who would'a thought.
Jesus did say "send me your poor". Not sure what else he said. But he had to be making money somehow.
Bro had infinite bread, fish and wine cheat codes, he must have been making bank
Have you tried starting a cult?
I'm afraid I'm not charismatic enough for that.
>Be me
>At the park, chilling
>Random white guy comes up to me
>Punches me in the face
>ouch.mp4
>"JESUS JESUS JESUS JESUS"
>yo dude, not coo-- !!
>he flashes his rolex
>alright, i'll let this one slide...
Court Transcript:
Judge: How do you plead?
Defendant: JESUS JESUS JESUS JESUS JESUS JESUS JESUS JESUS...
speeds away from courthouse
This is not unusual to see in midwest America; although I haven't lately seen the local "LIBERALS ARE DEMONIC" spelled out with $30 worth of reflective letter stickers.
Yup! We have a few those around my town.
Malkovich Malkovich?
Just landed a huge contract by following these rules. It is very sad but true.
In tech?
Security. Preemptive though.
Might be an issue in Spanish speaking countries
You'd say Mary or the Madonna there instead.
Jesus, really?
You don't need any of that if you're not stupid enough to get caught. Maybe stop being stupid?
I guess you have experience raping children and not getting caught then...
K
Welcome to White Quadrant 1
Needs wiggle room. You won't get away with everything, but it's even money that you could.
For all we know, Trump was the mastermind behind Epstein vacations.
Trump has never been the mastermind of his own breakfast. He's always been a useful idiot, especially now that his brain is soup