this post was submitted on 20 Mar 2026
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Lemmy Shitpost

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Welcome to Lemmy Shitpost. Here you can shitpost to your hearts content.

Anything and everything goes. Memes, Jokes, Vents and Banter. Though we still have to comply with lemmy.world instance rules. So behave!


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1. Be Respectful


Refrain from using harmful language pertaining to a protected characteristic: e.g. race, gender, sexuality, disability or religion.

Refrain from being argumentative when responding or commenting to posts/replies. Personal attacks are not welcome here.

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Content that violates the law. Any post/comment found to be in breach of common law will be removed and given to the authorities if required.

That means:

-No promoting violence/threats against any individuals

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Posting the same post, no matter the intent is against the rules.

-If you have posted content, please refrain from re-posting said content within this community.

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If you see content that is a breach of the rules, please flag and report the comment and a moderator will take action where they can.


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[–] Lemminary@lemmy.world 1 points 6 days ago

~~A girl who pops~~

A girl who shits

[–] Obnomus@lemmy.ml 1 points 6 days ago
[–] Jimbabwe@lemmy.world 124 points 1 week ago (2 children)

I came here to share that exact image. You beat me to it you bastard! Srs about the bastard part. I'm not trying to be playful.

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[–] popekingjoe@lemmy.world 110 points 1 week ago (2 children)

What a terrible day to be literate.

[–] daggermoon@piefed.world 8 points 1 week ago

I came here to type that exact comment. You beat me to it you bastard! Jk about the bastard part. I'm just trying to be playful.

[–] Godric@lemmy.world 96 points 1 week ago
[–] Kolanaki@pawb.social 56 points 1 week ago* (last edited 1 week ago)

"Close the damn door, it sounds like a horse pissing on a flat stone in there!" - My mom

[–] BootyEnthusiast@lemmy.dbzer0.com 42 points 1 week ago (1 children)
[–] ArmoredThirteen@lemmy.zip 38 points 1 week ago (2 children)

Amusing thing about this. Women do tend to pee more loudly and my trans brain for whatever reason was dysphoric about it. Post surgery though because of the shorter urethra, wider opening, and general angle of everything, I'm happily peeing like I'm frying pork chops

[–] ShinkanTrain@lemmy.ml 7 points 1 week ago (1 children)

Does that mean people with shorter and wider dicks pee louder too?

[–] shneancy@lemmy.world 7 points 1 week ago (1 children)

i think it's more that pussy havers can just– speedrun pissing without any consequences, push as hard as you can and there it is, double stream? doesn't matter. piss went to the left midway through? no worries

[–] ShinkanTrain@lemmy.ml 10 points 1 week ago (3 children)
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[–] hperrin@lemmy.ca 7 points 1 week ago* (last edited 1 week ago)

Imagine if they gave you an option.

Bottom Surgery Intake Form

  • [ ] Typical Pussy
  • [x] Big Ass Horse Pussy
[–] wesker 38 points 1 week ago (4 children)
[–] YiddishMcSquidish@lemmy.today 36 points 1 week ago (2 children)

What kinda wine do you usually pair with salmon?

[–] wesker 24 points 1 week ago

I very, very rarely drink. If I'm eating salmon, it's most often in the form of nigiri sushi, so I'd say likely a chilled, dry sake.

[–] fraksken@infosec.pub 10 points 1 week ago (2 children)

That was a cool read. I love short esoteric wiki holes.

[–] wesker 15 points 1 week ago (2 children)

Do you regularly pull up a seat at AMAs for other people?

Fuck off Wesker! You killed Enrico!

(Sorry I just played through the og game)

[–] fraksken@infosec.pub 7 points 1 week ago

Not regularly, no. Only when I feel I can help with my experience.

[–] dumbass@piefed.social 27 points 1 week ago* (last edited 1 week ago) (2 children)

In season 6 episode 19, of the 90s television show Star Trek: Deep Space Nine, titled In The Pale Moonlight, do you think Captain Sisko was justified in attacking Garak for the Assassination of the Romulan Ambassador, even tho Sisko knew full well the extent Garak was willing to go to fulfil his orders, due to his time in the obsidian order and also told him to " Just get it done", even if it was successful in bringing the romulans into the war and changing the outcome of the Dominion War?

[–] wesker 1 points 3 days ago

I've not watched DSN yet, but I'll let you know when I find out.

[–] Snowcano@startrek.website 13 points 1 week ago (1 children)

Sir, this is a ~~Wendy’s~~ lemmyshitpost.

[–] dumbass@piefed.social 17 points 1 week ago (1 children)

They said ask them anything, that's anything.

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[–] zout@fedia.io 7 points 1 week ago

Nope, no questions, not sorry!

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[–] OwOarchist@pawb.social 31 points 1 week ago (1 children)

Nothing wrong with horse pussy.

[–] wesker 29 points 1 week ago

Home instance checks out.

[–] daannii@lemmy.world 22 points 1 week ago (8 children)

But urine doesn't come out of the vagina.

[–] Lost_My_Mind@lemmy.world 53 points 1 week ago (3 children)

Well, not for guys it doesn't. It comes out of the balls!

[–] FishFace@piefed.social 13 points 1 week ago

That's just where it's stored. If it's coming out of them (like, directly), then you need to see a doctor.

It should be coming out of your butt.

[–] jaybone@lemmy.zip 11 points 1 week ago (1 children)

Some mornings I wake up with holes in my balls and the piss goes everywhere.

[–] MTZ@lemmy.world 4 points 1 week ago

People pay good money for the sprinkler effect.

[–] djdarren@piefed.social 9 points 1 week ago

And you cannot change my mind.

[–] hperrin@lemmy.ca 30 points 1 week ago (1 children)

Then you’re not putting enough in there.

[–] wesker 8 points 1 week ago

I rarely lol at comments, but this one got me.

[–] deacon@lemmy.world 18 points 1 week ago

Not with that attitude

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[–] Soulphite@reddthat.com 17 points 1 week ago (1 children)

Yall out there judging people's pissing noise levels? Jesus, humans are strange.

I think the dude I'm the image is savoring the sound.

[–] ickplant@lemmy.world 15 points 1 week ago

Bitches that pee loud also pee fast! In and out before you know it. Such an evolutionary advantage, tiger can’t kill when so fast.

Don’t ask me how I know.

[–] captainlezbian@lemmy.world 10 points 1 week ago
[–] M137@lemmy.world 5 points 1 week ago

ΰ² _ΰ² 

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