this post was submitted on 01 Jun 2026
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Comic Strips

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Transcript8 panel comic

Panel 1: Yellow guy is working on a laptop in the background. In the foreground is a Brand Manager. Yellow Guy: “Sir, shall I put up our rainbow profile picture?”

Panel 2: Brand Manger snaps his head round and hisses “Cool your jets, Eugene. I’m checking the Profitometer”

Panel 3: Gonna do my best to explain this. We see The Profitometer. A huge machine that whirs and ticks. A digital display at the top of the machine reads “Supporting Pride equals”Beneath this display is a huge gauge with “Max Loss” on the left and “Max profit” on the right. There is a needle that is pointing exactly half way between the two extremes.

Panel 4: Close up on Brand Manager’s face. His teeth are gritted. Sweat trickles down his brow.

Panel 5: Close up on gauge. The needle remains exactly central

Panel 6: Close up on Brand Manager’s eyes. They are concentrating intensely. Also, more sweat.

Panel 7: Close up on the gauge. The needle clicks ONE DEGREE towards profit

Panel 8: Brand Manager screams like a football coach “GO GAY EUGENE”

Source

top 33 comments
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[–] ininewcrow@lemmy.ca 78 points 3 days ago (2 children)

The same meter is used for every decision ....

  • show gay pride flag
  • show pink ribbon
  • show black ribbon
  • pizza party Friday
  • use more AI
  • throw children in boiling oil
  • use more solar
  • use more green energy
  • supporting Nazism
  • replace lead paint in offices
  • raise worker pay
  • apply more OSHA regulations and keep workers safe
  • destroy all life everywhere
  • bean bag chairs
  • ping pong tables in workplace

.... and depending on whether or not anything will throw the meter to Maximum profit or Maximum loss, the company, the CEO and the board will get behind anything, as long as it means more money for them.

The second coming of Christ could arrive tomorrow and if supporting Satan to battle against the Son of God meant more profit for the company, the company would throw all their support behind the Dark Prince and they would all hail Satan, regardless of how Christian they might have been beforehand!

[–] LovableSidekick@lemmy.world 6 points 3 days ago* (last edited 3 days ago)

Wait wait wait tho! I base all my buying decisions on the frequency of company pizza parties and interdepartmental pingpong tournaments. Don't disillusion my activism!!!

[–] wonderingwanderer@sopuli.xyz 1 points 3 days ago

"Fallen, Fallen, Babylon the Great! Her merchants weep because she is no more."

[–] GraniteM@lemmy.world 44 points 3 days ago* (last edited 3 days ago) (2 children)

It's actually an example where 100% soulless corporatism can result in better moral outcomes than a particular ideology. Disney corporate doesn't give a fuck about queer folk as human beings, but because there was money to be made, they were more likely to side with them than with the DeSantis administration. This is only so long as it's profitable, but it's still actually preferable to actively seeking to persecute theys and thems purely out of ideological hatred, even at the expense of tearing down a chunk of the economy.

[–] lobut@lemmy.ca 29 points 3 days ago

I worked at a company which did the gay pride logo switch.

I know it doesn't mean much from people but the ones who pushed changing the logos were from our LGBT employees.

[–] AA5B@lemmy.world 7 points 3 days ago* (last edited 3 days ago)

I don’t know, Disney got hit pretty hard on that. Its difficult to believe that was a big enough brand hit to counteract DeSantis’ spite

I do believe companies also support causes when it doesn’t cost them anything and may give intangible benefit.

[–] TotallyWorthLife@lemmy.world 7 points 2 days ago (2 children)

Say what you wanna say about Rainbow Capitalism, but it's kinda a mine canary situation. If they don't do it, it means it's not profitable, which is a great indicator shit is not going good in public acceptance.

[–] davidgro@lemmy.world 2 points 1 day ago (1 children)

It's also possible that people are getting tired of the Capitalism part of it and not the Rainbow - in other words they know it's pandering and don't like that.

[–] TotallyWorthLife@lemmy.world 3 points 1 day ago (1 children)

Given the rest of things will stay the same, I prefer to be pandered to than not at all

[–] MathiasTCK@lemmy.world 2 points 19 hours ago
[–] schipelblorp@sh.itjust.works 5 points 2 days ago* (last edited 2 days ago)

No, it's still profitable by sales, but not profitable by politically-motivated IRS investigations and anti-trust enforcement and arbitrary tarrifs. I don't think the consequences of a fully politicized regulatory system has come into view yet.

[–] LovableSidekick@lemmy.world 29 points 3 days ago* (last edited 3 days ago) (1 children)

This is one thing I wish people who either love or hate companies based on how they outwardly appear to support their pet causes would understand. With very few exceptions, they Really Don't Care. Like, at all. Your passionate belief that Company X is on your side is probably just another tooth fairy, and so is the cozy feeling that you're doing The Right Thing by buying toothpaste from them instead of the Evil toothpaste company.

[–] cRazi_man@europe.pub 9 points 3 days ago (2 children)

Corporate virtue signalling is very much a flavour of the day kind of thing.

People who think organisations are genuine or caring or give a shit about them at all are deluded. The fanboys are the worst.

[–] LovableSidekick@lemmy.world 8 points 3 days ago (1 children)

I think the same also goes for hating corps for not virtue signaling, but saying that on social media is like pissing on The Flag™.

[–] Aceticon@lemmy.dbzer0.com 1 points 2 days ago

Either way, it all boils down to expecting a Sociopath to genuinelly care about what's good for anybody but themselves, rather than just claim they love whatever to get something out of others or don't claim it because it's not going to lead to them get anything from others.

They really don't give a shit about you and your feelings unless they get something for themselves from making believe like they care.

[–] SaharaMaleikuhm@feddit.org 4 points 3 days ago

But it is hilarious to see people break their keurigs, flush their Gillette razors or burn their Nike's when the do the most milquetoast progressive commercial. I wish we would get more of that

[–] edgemaster72@lemmy.world 12 points 3 days ago (1 children)

Go, Gay Eugene
— Vs. —
Go gay, Eugene

A comma makes all the difference

Hey that's not nice my aunt was in a comma

Go gay Eugene needs to be an emoji

[–] Angryhumanoid@fedinsfw.app 4 points 3 days ago (3 children)

Far be it from me to be a pedantic asshole but I think the label on the graph should be Net Loss/Profit.

It'd have to be four panels for Loss.

[–] LovableSidekick@lemmy.world 2 points 3 days ago* (last edited 3 days ago) (1 children)

Those are the default meanings - you obviously didn't read Appendix H.

[–] Angryhumanoid@fedinsfw.app 1 points 3 days ago

Look, Appendix H can go fuck itself, I'm not falling for that trick again.

[–] dohpaz42@lemmy.world 1 points 3 days ago (1 children)

There wasn’t max profit in those labels.

🥁 😁

[–] Angryhumanoid@fedinsfw.app 2 points 3 days ago

Unless Max Profit is the name of the person they release to make things rainbow colored, in which case I withdraw my complaint.

[–] MonkderVierte@lemmy.zip 2 points 3 days ago

Who tf calls his boss "sir"? Not in this industry.