No Stupid Questions

Yes, I believe it is. I think everyone is a bit of a hypocrite by default and we all ought to strive to apply the same rules to ourselves as we do to others

Have you ever met someone like the people you want everyone to act like? I have. Many times. They are usually either SUPER neurotic or very rigid and extremely unforgiving of themselves when they don't meet their own standards. Everyone bitches about them or pathologizes them. So no it's not human nature because humans are not a monolith with default behaviors.

“We judge ourselves by our intentions and others by their behaviour.”
― Stephen M.R. Covey

You have way more context about your own actions, so it's much easier to justify yourself than random strangers that you know nothing about.

Oi boy!

The very short answer is: yes. Usually it's called psychological biases and literally everyone has them - even people who are studying them daily, to be very clear. They just become way more self aware.

The reason is simple: our brains are gooey, bad calculators - but awesome pattern recognizers. Even if there are no patterns.

This leads to things we observe to be "clear" to us - but our own behavior needs a lot of mental effort to be observed by one self.

Just think about a normal dialogue and try to think about your body language, tone of voice, body odor, social appearance and all the other micro information you're sending out - while talking.

It's less about a double standard and more about what we evaluate about ourselves ehwne not investing additional effort.

Likely. Some people do it massively while others minorly. Im sure there are a few things im a hypocrite on but I can't recall them atm. The old do as I say not as I do thing.

Read this in Subliminal by Leonard Mlodinow: human brains are biased towards optimism, but also, to value own decisions above others'. Baggage from thousands of years ago, but it's there.

Oh! Oh! Another good one to know is the Fundamental Attribution Error. That's the double standard whereby people explain their own behavior in terms of extrinsic influences and pressures on themselves, so that even if they do bad things, it's not their own fault. They had little choice, you see. But, in contrast, we can't see the extrinsic influences and pressures on other people, so we explain their bad behavior as the result of intrinsic factors, i.e. they're bad people.

If there were no double standards then there would be no standards at all

The driving one is called the Lake Wobegon Effect. When everybody rates themselves as above-average at something, like driving, that's definitionally impossible. The name comes from the segment, the News from Lake Wobegon, on the radio show A Prairie Home Companion, which Garrison Keillor would always sign off, "That's the news from Lake Wobegon, where all the women are strong, all the men are good-looking, and all the children are above average."

But yes, it's so common that the phenomenon has a name.

Everyone will be a hypocrite eventually, it's the ones that don't care about hypocrisy that you want to stay away from.

The highest standard is the standard we hold others to. I try holding myself to the same standard, and continually fall short. Teaches a hell of a lot of empathy and humility though

We judge Ourselves by our Intentions

We judge Others by their Actions/Choices/Results

Yup, we always treat ourselves differently than others.

Short answer: Yes.

Long answer: Hopelessly true for the general population, but I've overcome it through self-examination and reflection because I'm special.

I meet a lot of people who want an honest relationship, but also date around a lot while looking and will go on dates with several other people while still trying things with someone else and that never made sense to me. If you're looking for an honest, monogamous relationship it makes more sense to me to try dating 1 person at a time. If they are worth a 2nd date id say they are worth giving a fair shot and not seeing 3 other people on first dates before that 2nd date ever happens.

In my experience I'm the weird one for this view and most people tend to date and sleep around until a commited relationship starts out of that mess and one party puts their foot down on the other seeing other people for dates.

I heard from the psychoanalyst I've been consulting with, that it's something expected from the human psychê (something about the unsolvable conflict between Id, Ego and Superego, as the psychoanalyst is aligned with the Freudian way of psychoanalysis).

And, then, we look at the Nature we came from and belong to, and... isn't the double standards something inherent to the very predator-prey dynamics? An owl mercilessly hunts and eats a mouse, yet she evolved mechanisms to camouflage herself before the tree bark, so other species don't cause her harm. She avoids being hunted, but she hunts.

Furher zooming out, this can also be observed throughout cosmos somehow. Poetically speaking, when a star collapses in her own gravitational field and develops a singularity, she tries to win the tug-of-war when faced by another singularity. She doesn't want to be pulled and consumed by other matter, but she wants to pull and consume matter.

If we go transcendental, Yaodabaoh is trying to dictate and have a creation submissive to his whims, in this timeless effort not to compromise his Yang pole and submit himself to the Yin pole of Cosmic Mother Goddess (Sophia). Similarly, one (especially one aligned with Demiurge and his archons) could find "double standards" at the fact that She had split from him (Demiurge as Her syzygy) seeking to be independent from him, yet She (IMHO, reasonably) doesn't want him to fulfill his independence through his cosmic creation (because this harms Her own independence).

The very fabric of existence and "non-existence" (the timeless transcendental aka "the pleroma") reek of double standards, so it seems.

!nostupidquestions@lemmy.world