"And why was God a swan?"
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Your underage wife
Fun fact, the Nicine Creed exists because this question was a legitimate crisis of Christianity. The council of Nicaea determined that Jesus was not created by God but rather "begotten", meaning he was equivalent to God but not the same as God, and has existed for all eternity as part of God
JK Rowling level of world building
Is this why no one in the Bible is trans?
Yeesh,what an illustration of the goofy bullshit people make up to avoid fixing what's actually wrong with their belief systems...
Oh, sure. Mock Christianity. But no one bats an eye when Tolkien retcons half of The Hobbit and gives an excuse like "well the book is written by Bilbo and he lied at first".
Well, IIRC The Hobbit was initially just a collection of bedtime fairy tales he made up for his children, of course it had inconsistencies.
Actually, thinking about it, that seems like a plausible source of the Old Testament as well...
Religion started because kids were asking their dad questions. “Daddy why is the sky blue?, Why does the sun move across the sky?, Why why why daddy” “Uh uh some sort of god does that, yeah a god”
And then those kids grew up and still believe that story et voila you got religion.
"Damn the boy..."
I don't remember anyone telling me that bilbo was the son of God, so I think we can hold different yardsticks here.
Well of course not. Samwise was the incarnation of all that is good, loyal, and holy. Bilbo was just a prophet.
Hold on there. Wasn't ‘LotR’ supposedly finished by Sam after Frodo dipped?
The difference is that, afaik, Christianity has people that believes that Bible is NOT fiction, while nobody thinks that The Hobbit is a historical book.
while nobody thinks that The Hobbit is a historical book.
...yet
Well, I give you that point...
BUT I HAVE A BETTER ONE: •
I mean, The Hobbit was primarily written to be a children’s bedtime story. The fact that adults latched onto it was sort of an accident. Tolkien was primarily a linguist, not a writer. He developed several fake languages, and wanted an excuse to use them. So he did a ton of world building, just to have a reason to write song lyrics in elvish and dwarven.
He also does say it's fiction, no?
Most stories are fiction until some fool believes it hard enough.
What's the retcon in the hobbit?
The ring was just a magic ring. And other stuff.
Joseph. The most in-denial man in history.
The O.G. cuck.
* The OMG cuck
Hey man don't kinkshame
Not just the ass, but the oxen and sheep, too!

“I baked you a pie, Mary”
Once you've fucked the Holy Ghost you know where the magic happens. Definitely not with the village carpenter.
Sorry Joseph I have to cuck you with your virgin wife. I swear this isn't some fantasy of mine
When you cuckslurp after god you get certain powers and also sainthood