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this post was submitted on 25 Aug 2024
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Men are often expected to swallow their emotions and just "function", while women are allowed and even encouraged to display them openly
That's a funny one because men are celebrated for suppressing emotions and women are penalisd for showing them.
Its sort of crazy how there's no real effort to help people develop their emotional intelligence as a kid or beyond. It should be like no later than grade 1 or 2 where people learn about their feelings and setting limits with people.
So many parents gasp at the idea of their child actually having boundaries that are to be respected because muh dominion or they never learned about it themselves and aren't open to everyone simply being more observant and respectful of them
One reason we chose the school my kids go to is because they do teach about emotions and friendship and so on.
Thats awesome! Super important stuff for being well and a good person to have around for others
Yeah, it is one of the things I love about the district we are in. They are big on EQ and also very inclusive (my kids are on the spectrum, so I like that they actively teach about inclusion).
This is called Social Emotional Learning and is a big thing in the school I teach in, but has big pushback from many conservatives because it talks about respecting people for their differences, even if they are gay or trans or a poc.
There's a huge discrepancy in how people understand the word respect.
The "blindly follow what I say and override all your reactions to the pain it will probably cost" and hold your tongue/bottle your emotions shit needs to die in a fire. That is blind control, it is very different and it means much more work and negative outcomes for all involved.
Love this, thanks for giving such shape to the form I was getting at
Np. It's not mine of course, but unfortunately I don't know what the source is.
Yeah the patriarchy is really just the ruling class using us to suppress each other.
Which is also funny because that leads directly to a lot of mental problems for these men.
I see a change is this trend, but a lot of damage has already been done and it will take quite a while to recover from this.
Unless that emotion is anger. That's the one exception.
Yes! 100%.
Hmmm, I think Kyle Rittenhouse and Gus Walz might have a different perspective. One displayed remorse through blubbering "tears" to play-act out of murder charges and one displayed genuine emotion for a successful family member. Both were pilloried for displaying emotion, fake or real.
Magic Eight Ball says: Concentrate and ask again
Women absolutely are penalized for showing emotion. Socially between friends there is a lot better support, and that is probably what you are thinking of. In a workplace environment though, there can be serious consequences for expressing anything other than congeniality. If you're socially withdrawn you're an ice queen, if you get angry (no matter how justifiable) you're a bitch or a dragon lady. If you're stressed and not perfectly composed you're weak "unable to handle the pressure". I get that men are subject to the same kind of judgments but there seems to be more leeway.
It's not that women are "allowed," it's more so that women are expected to be emotional because they're oh such emotional creatures and of course she's crying.
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I would counter this and say any woman with a career can absolutely not show emotion. They’re expected to behave like men, which are in turn not supposed to show emotion in the workplace. It’s less of a double standard and more of a toxic standard.
Commenter didn't say work. It's true in all circumstances.
You recognizing it as true in the work place by understanding women are expected to be like men in the work place. Because men are not expected to show emotions.
Your counter is actually an example.