this post was submitted on 03 Feb 2026
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My dang wife forgot to do the dang megathread so now you lot get this shit.
Let this be a lesson.
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OCD shadowboxing
But what if I can't trust my thoughts? What if I only feel happier because this is giving me some sense of purpose or something to work towards, whereas I might've felt just as happy learning to skateboard or something?β»β β»β οΈ΅β γ½β (β `β Πβ Β΄β )β οΎβ οΈ΅β β»β β» i hate having a brain
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Honestly, even if that were true, why would it matter?Cause it would mean this might not be right for me? And the idea of that horrifies me so I know that's not true. But it still nibbles at the edges of my brain
Would it mean it's not right for you? If you had learned to skateboard and that made you happy, would you need a medical test to prove you were meant to be a skateboarder?
Ugh no, but I still feel like it's different, even if I can't articulate it properly
Transitioning is absolutely a different thing than skateboarding in some ways, but I think the differences that matter are different than the ones you're worried about. I pressed you with one of the questions I got caught on a few years ago when I was wrestling with things that sound similar to what you've been saying. Over time as I've worked through my thoughts about being trans, being a person, and being a trans person, the things like this that worried me most at the time feel more and more like they don't need to be part of how anybody lives their life. I'd enjoy talking about it more if you want to.
Cis men don't wonder if theyre trans like that or feel happy being women
This is why I'm totally against trans/gender gatekeeping, and by that I mean trying to define one specific gender-nonconforming group as "trans" while explaining drag queens, crossdressers, femboys, etc. as something completely different.
I feel like all gender non-conformance should be welcomed under the trans umbrella. We want people to be able to live happier lives by being their true selves, right? So then why would we want to rigidly define oiurselves in a way that makes it harder for people to do that?
Leslie Feinberg was more or less saying the same thing, might even be the originator lol, in like the 90s. I get why it started meaning more binary transition and then maybe opened up to anyone who had a gender expression other than what a doctor said at birth - but I think we should probably have it open up again too