this post was submitted on 27 Mar 2026
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Slop.
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Wearing my awkward chest holster to pipe smoking camp.
This is what happens when the campy need to accessories conflicts with the innate fear of an American man being perceived as feminine. Instead of a useful sling bag, you get a useless/dangerous gun holster.
There is no more of a campy fashion obsessed person than someone pretending to be a cowboy. I work in the southwest in orthotics and prosthetics and have had full grown men have crying tantrums when I tell them that the brace I built to help them walk again won't work with cowboy boots. "Do you know how much these cost, they're hand stitched!" Is something Ive had screamed at me multiple times. My dude, you work for paycom. They would rather be physically impaired than than give up their suburban cowboy dress gimmick.
This is really, really funny, and I want to thank you for posting. I needed a laugh today.
It would be hilarious for me as well if it wasn't so commonplace where I am. One of the ortho docs at my hospital got in trouble a couple years ago because he made his own commercial for himself after the marketing department told him he couldn't wear his cowboy hat/boots in their commercial.
Him and his office still occasionally wear the shirts he had made out of protest/spite after being subpoenaed by the head of marketing.
It's contagious. The ortho team call themselves the cowboys of the operating room. What's worse is that Im at a university hospital, and so we get residents from all over the country/world. So you'll see kids who grew up in New Hampshire essentially get bullied/peer-pressured into operating on people in cowboy boots.
Okay we've looped back around to being sad. Don't get me wrong it's still kinda funny, but WOW, the level of self-harm toxic masculinity perpetuates is wild.
Yeap, luckily my specialty isn't taught at this university so nobody in my department grew up here. So even though we're part of orthopedics and rehabilitation, I'm mostly kept isolated from the cowboy particles, and everybody here thinks it's incredibly weird.
They are infectious though. I picked up "howdy" while living in the South. I'd never cosplay with a hat or boots, but I'll hit everyone and their mother with a friendly howdy. Even though I'm now back in the frozen north where I belong.
Even better, I'm pretty sure that's a vape not a pipe
Ceci n'est pas une pipe
You have got to be kidding me, just smoke a pipe!
I can only assume the tobacconist is somewhere in the scary town, whereas the vape tree is somewhere out there in the wilderness. Perhaps he struck a deal with the squirrels for it.
i'd respect that if it was one of the pre-juice vapes where it was about heating up plant matter but not burning it so you got a slightly different mix of chemicals and no soot/ash