BIGGER AND MORE PRIDEFUL THAN EVER BEFORE 
Dastardly controllers of featured posts: *removes trans mega*
Trans mega: "Fuck it, we ball 
"
this post was submitted on 24 Jun 2024
69 points (100.0% liked)
traaaaaaannnnnnnnnns
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i heard somewhere that "healhy" fats are good for helping tits grow. my roommates came back from the food bank the other day with like 8 goddamn pounds of almonds so I'm seeing if I can turn those into tiddies
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All dressed up, nowhere to be, ever
I could rot, let's do it together
Yoooooo she jus like me fr fr!! I lied, Fishmonger fucks. Hits different the fourth time 
Looking @ the nonbinary flag in this dork youtube nerd's profile pic, and a switch flips somewhere in my brain - Oh yeah, me now 
Funny enough I always thought the nb flag was rad as hell. I'll be internalising this for probably the next few months at least - every other day it seems I recognise a new and funny way that being nb alters my being, feels good.
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god she's so great, i love her. if only she was a remotely playable card 
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Hope everyone has a nice day for the last day of pride month tomorrow! 
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Shoutout to the voices, no one is suspicious of me saying nonsense while voice training because I already say nonsense with weird voices all the time.
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okay, let me ask a question:
what does being visibly trans mean to you? like, emotionally. do you think it's important? is it something that you're comfortable with?
i am, in my opinion, pretty visibly trans doing a pretty visible thing and the only time i really remember that is when people talk about how it's important. i make a mental note of basically every time i've positively affected a queer person doing my stuff and those moments are some of the few things i actually keep in my memory when i need motivation. the best thing about being trans is the sense of community, even if not all of us hold exactly the same values. we're all on this ride together, for better or worse.
i think visibility is important too, i just don't see living my life as some sort of project or praxis. i'm doing the only thing i've ever cared about, as the woman i was meant to be, and i'm not gonna let anything stop me, especially not a transphobe. it feels like cognitive dissonance and it's progressed to the point where i literally forget i'm trans in public until i'm in a situation where i am acutely aware of it, either by someone mentioning it, being around another trans person, or being painfully, obviously alone in a sea of cis people. how the fuck do i keep forgetting a pillar of my existence despite actively being dysphoric almost every day? i'm torn between my identity being a foundational part of my personality and just wanting to forget about it when i'm out. i think passing fully would be great but i don't know who i'd be if i lost that thread tugging at my heart when i'm waiting in line at the store or whatever.
maybe that was all rambling and i'm doing my best not to give away too much info but it is something i'd like to get some perspective on. would you rather pass fully and live your life without any of the hard parts of being trans or would you rather live with the hardship and be a beacon for other trans/queer people to know that we're existing in the world and they can too?
what does being visibly trans mean to you? like, emotionally. do you think it's important? is it something that you're comfortable with?
Well first of all, i have no fucking idea what "being visibly trans" entails as long as you do not hold up a sign saying "out and proud trans warrior". I'm a bit over one and a half years into the physical part my transition (you can add two more years for questioning and transitioning socially) and i wouldn't say that i have had particularly great starting conditions for passing, but it actually seems to work reasonably well for me since i got rid of my facial hair and started growing my boobs. I don't feel as if i'm "visibly trans", and that's not even getting into how many trans people i know who do not have any commonly understood visible clichΓ©s of transness or how many cis people do have a ton of these supposed telltale signs. From my lived experience, i do not think that "being visibly trans" is a thing for most of us once we're a few years into our transitions.
And then there's girls who started transitioning literally 20 years earlier than me, who have much more visible curves, who i do not perceive as having bad passing at all, yet they make plausible claims that they've never gotten gendered correctly by strangers a single time in their life, and they have the history of being victims to hate crimes to prove it. And i seriously don't know why they go through life with such hardships and i don't. It makes zero sense to me. I don't get what constitutes "visible transness", there seems to be very little connecting the transfems i know who pass most of the time and there seems to be very little connecting those that don't. It comes off as incredibly random in either case.
i think passing fully would be great but i don't know who i'd be if i lost that thread tugging at my heart when i'm waiting in line at the store or whatever.
For me, it mostly meant that i stopped viewing transness as a deficit narrative and now view it entirely as a liberatory and subversive experience. When i do not pass, i violate established notions of gender because i refuse to be put in a neatly labeled box and confuse people with my gender presentation and when i do pass, i violate established notions of gender as well because i'm fully free from the restrictions people who want to assign me the wrong gender try to pin on me and because i prove the "you can always tell" crowd wrong. I win either way, cisnormativity loses either way.
And this is infinitely better than all this dysphoria-centric bs and all this passing-obsessed bs that i'm so fucking fed up with. I'm not a fan of how our community commonly talks about the trans experience, hexbear isn't even a particularly bad place in this regard and reading the mega is still a minefield of self hatred and internalised transphobia where i just scroll past all the spoilers, and past all the shit that should be spoilered and wonder what i'm doing here. I do not let myself be defined by suffering and pain and never being good enough, fuck that noise. I'm free in a hundred ways cishets can't even conceive off, i'm out there finally being me and finally living the life i've always deserved, why should i feel anything but joy about being trans? And don't give me any of this "but being cis would be so much easier" crap, i do not know a single cis woman who's happy in the way i am.
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I just live my life assuming everyone will immediately know that I'm trans. It makes it way more fun when they don't. I also live somewhere where being trans hasn't come with many disadvantages so I have the luxury of being openly trans.
I spent years obsessing about passing, but it was deeply unhealthy. I have really inaccurate self-perception so even letting myself care about it caused massive amounts of stress over every aspect of my appearance.
If I could just be cis, or just look cis, I would still take that option though. Not because of external societal forces, but because I am a maelstrom of dysphoria and dysmorphia and I think it would shut my brainworms up a bit.
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Thinking of making a resources / help / psa thread for condensing down some old pins into one post and just have it exist for a long time
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Good morning 
hello 
holy shit was this part of my thighs this squishy before?? i think my thighs are a little squishier 
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We're approaching 300 comments on Wednesday. They only perceived a fraction of our power before. Now they are coming to realize how POWERFUL we truly are! 
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complaining about my therapist, detrans, generally not really believing me
The cw kind of sums it all up but this week's session really didn't make me feel better about them. They brought up detrans people and how important it was to make sure before doing anything (I mean I guess?). Talked about how many of their clients stopped after two weeks. They talked about how I never ha e really put effort into how I look and should try that more before deciding to transition.
Another big thing they brought up was influence, as if I was being influenced into being trans. They talked about that for a little while.
I'm sure they said some affirming stuff too, like about how small things can be really helpful (like plushies/nails).
I don't know. I'm so insecure in my identity already I just wish they weren't like this. I know some of it seems really bad but this is how they are about other things too, just likes to explore all the options I guess.
And yes I'm pretty stuck with this one, at least for now. It just really sucks this is the best I have irl (I know having a therapist at all is a huge privilege but I do wish I had some trans/ally friends)
I mean, transition is indeed a process, but also I don't think you should focus on how hard it would be to detransition if you're wrong or something. Focus on figuring out what you actually like, try different things, try hormones if you want (you can stop before 3 months with basically no permanent changes).
For me, I did a partial social transition before I got on E for my own reasons. But also, it's really hard. That being said it does build up your skin for it though lol.
I guess, I'd say if you're unsure, just do some exploration. Nails, plushies, grooming, clothes, wigs (if you want), breast forms, all sorts of things. If you're in a city there is probably some support group around? Check your local lgbt center if you have one.
Hormones can come later if you want. But that absolute, 100% knowledge that I'm trans didn't come for me and I think never would come for me without just trying hormones. Even still idk it's weird. I'm pretty damn sure but also dysphoria is a bitch and always has me second guessing.
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Rad Pride is this Saturday. Half excited to go to a Pride Thing for the first time in like a decade, half nervous because apparently this has historically been a very anti-communist event and I'll be going to represent my party.
Just finished my second individual session 0 with my group for Pathfinder. So far, two successes out of two sessions. Getting pretty big compliments from the two people I've run for thus far and it feels awesome. They're having fun and I hope that session 1 goes just as great for everyone. And I must say, I'm having a great time thus far DMing. It's fantastic.
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Dumb question for the femmes, do men (that you don't previously know) often engage in small talk or friendly convos for platonic reasons or is it usually flirting? I've only been with queer ppl previously and the hetero world is bizarre to me
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More moderate cognitohazards
Paul Takes The Form Of A Mortal Girl is doing a bit. It's trying to get me to deem it an egg story, to pidgeonhole Paul as a trans woman (he was assigned male at birth) and declare it all to be an egg thing. But yo, what the fuck? He lived full-time as a woman with his terf gf Diane and when he lost that he got miserable... so he goes back to being a guy (nominally) and having casual sex again. While he is miserable about this state of affairs, he's also extremely detached, knows he can get anything from his waiter whom he's fucking with "his lost boy routine". Idk who Paul is or what he wants. He just seems to move through whatever situations or relationships and meld his dumb ass to whoever he currently likes or fucks.
Fuckin'... despite being able to change literally every permutation of his body to match any gender presentation, Paul is still hopelessly detached and can only use his shifting as a shield, or to blend with someone. Left to his own devices, he just falls back on whatever is easiest... huh...
I am at like 60% and this might still be beyond me to comprehend, which doesn't feel good. Almost desperate enough to consult Goodreads reviews, but given all the stuff I'm pretty sure the reviews will be unfunny.
I posted the other day about presenting femme in public, forgetting, and then catching myself in the mirror for a great surprise.
Well, the opposite just happened. I hade to take off my nail polish, and I looked down at my feet just now, and I'm like, "whose fucking feet are those!?"
Looks like my husband might tell his best friend and best friends wife about me next weekend. We will be seeing them for the holiday and he really wants to tell his friend. I'm ok with it I just hope it goes well. His wife is low-key one of the biggest sources of gender envy for me. I really hope we can still be friends. I doubt it'll be a problem but you know anxiety and all.
I keep going to the home page thinking the trans mega is still pinned but it's not. 
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The fact that literally all the major boss fights have an npc summon and multiple questlines relies on you summoning npc clearly shows that Fromsoft wants you to summon.
Got around to watching I Saw the TV Glow on Saturday night.
I loved the movie, but like it wasn't as emotionally devastating as I'd hoped it would be. Maybe I'm just busted? Idk like I definitely connected with the film on a lot of its parts/aspects. There were even certain parts of the film where I already knew what the main character was going to say before it was said.
spoiler
The part on the bleachers where Tera/Maddy was asking Isabel about her sexuality hit a little too close and I literally answered "I don't know" out loud before Isabel did.
Idk maybe I'm more emotionally locked up than I thought or maybe my expectations were too high or maybe I was just too ready to be analytical instead of just taking the movie as it comes.
I'll re-watch it again, probably soon. I'll definitely remember it as one of my favorite movies, I identify far too personally with the text for it to not be; I just wanted to share the connection with it that many trans people are saying they felt with it, and I'm a little disheartened that I feel like I didn't connect in the same way that some people did.
catastrophizing about work
I'm really stressed about my job. I like my job, and I like the work. But I'm worried about the future when it becomes hard to ignore my transition. Its not a big place, there is only 15 of us. More than half are boomers who will be retiring in the next few years. Most of the rest of my coworkers are your standard variety Gen x Cartman wannabe types. But a few are really cool and probably won't be a problem. Both my foreman and the big boss really like me. I'm super productive compared to the boomers and I know things no one else does.
But the work culture is shitty blue collar in a shitty Midwestern state. 80% of the work I do, I am in the field and alone for, but I do have to spend time at the shop. The city where work is located has some really strong anti-discrimination laws and they can't just fire me. Especially since I've had nothing but exemplary reviews every 6 months for the last 3 years. I'm outside of my apprenticeship, I'm outside of any probationary time.
I guess I really don't want to be a target and I really don't want to get fired. Sure, I'm positive I'd win the lawsuit if I got fired but still I am stressed about the potential stress of it. 
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Playing Celeste (I must have grabbed it in a bundle thousands of years ago) to see if it's actually good 
I haven't felt very trans the last 24ish hours, chat is it over for me?
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