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submitted 3 weeks ago* (last edited 3 weeks ago) by Diuretic_Materialism@hexbear.net to c/chapotraphouse@hexbear.net

Probably already a thing, but I worked in a brewery for a little bit, and there's this thing called contract brewing where you get another brewery to make beer for you and then you sell it under your branding.

So we find some brewery, have them make a couple batches of the cheapest ass pale ale they can (pale ale is probs the cheapest beer you can make on scale), and then slap labels that say "Anti-Woke Beer, No SOY! Made with Liberal Tears!" And sell it and get $$$.

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[-] UlyssesT@hexbear.net 28 points 3 weeks ago

Just do "Black Rifle Coffee" but for beer. Along with the price spike for tactical labeling and lettering, make sure it deliberately tastes horrible because things tasting good makes men weak or something.

[-] NephewAlphaBravo@hexbear.net 22 points 3 weeks ago* (last edited 3 weeks ago)

weak men make bad beer

bad beer makes strong men

etc etc

[-] Nakoichi@hexbear.net 8 points 3 weeks ago

But then strong men make weak beer.

Strong men make strong beer

Strong beer makes weak men

Weak men make weak beer

Weak beer makes men hard

Hard men make men hard

[-] DragonBallZinn@hexbear.net 6 points 3 weeks ago

Beer and strong men make me hard soviet-bottom

I wonder if they made a mistake on not also branding their 200mg espresso cans to suburban mothers and college kids

[-] Wheaties@hexbear.net 26 points 3 weeks ago
[-] Sulvor@hexbear.net 25 points 3 weeks ago

The grifters were way ahead of you on this one. "Ultra Right" beer.

[-] Rojo27@hexbear.net 14 points 3 weeks ago

Yeah, I was going to say I'm pretty sure they've done that. Hell, they've even done anti-woke wateragony-shivering

[-] DragonBallZinn@hexbear.net 21 points 3 weeks ago

Spitballing brand names:

  • The Ku Klux Kans
  • 4cans
  • GOPints
  • Chuggin' Chud.
  • Chugchud
  • Triumph of the Wheat
  • Seig Hop
  • Nectar of Hyperborea
[-] UlyssesT@hexbear.net 11 points 3 weeks ago

Golden Eagle American Heritage Armory Reserve grillman

Golden American Manly Eagle Reserve freeze-gamer

[-] UlyssesT@hexbear.net 4 points 3 weeks ago

With some shitty freeze-gamer promotional code for additional Cawadoody War Crimes Points for their Colonialism Pass or something.

[-] DragonBallZinn@hexbear.net 3 points 3 weeks ago

Good name, but I think Golden Heritage is perfect for a fashy beer name. It just sounds so larpy.

[-] UlyssesT@hexbear.net 1 points 3 weeks ago

Maybe even some cringe about "The Emperor Protects" or whatever on it as a wink wink nudge for very clever cryptofash.

[-] goose@hexbear.net 9 points 3 weeks ago* (last edited 3 weeks ago)

Liber-ale Tears

Mar-a-Lager

[-] SSJMarx@lemm.ee 5 points 3 weeks ago

Mar-a-Lager

Damn that's a good one Trump could become a billionaire again if he sold this.

[-] DragonBallZinn@hexbear.net 3 points 3 weeks ago

I thought of adding some Trump theme’d beer but I’m also conflicted because Trump doesn’t drink.

[-] PointAndClique@hexbear.net 16 points 3 weeks ago

The "The sale of this beer does NOT go towards funding Maoist Guerrillas in the Philippines" label has people asking a lot of questions already answered by the label

[-] anonochronomus@hexbear.net 14 points 3 weeks ago

There's a hard seltzer called Happy Dad that uses the Nazi NFT monkey on its packaging.

[-] DragonBallZinn@hexbear.net 4 points 3 weeks ago

MFW they literally called themselves Yuga labs.

agony-shivering

[-] SSJMarx@lemm.ee 2 points 3 weeks ago

I don't know why I felt compelled to look it up, it's exactly as awful looking as it sounds.

[-] MusicOwl@hexbear.net 12 points 3 weeks ago

can’t have good beer anymore, because of woke.

[-] Belly_Beanis@hexbear.net 11 points 3 weeks ago

All beer is anti-woke because they make me sleepy. Need to get back to my uni levels of alcohol tolerance to own the libs.

[-] Llituro@hexbear.net 9 points 3 weeks ago

i don't remember the brand, but i do remember having seen contract anti-woke beer being advertised before lmao

[-] Llituro@hexbear.net 4 points 3 weeks ago

also, Minhas is a contract brewer that makes absolute garbo for TJ's so that's got my vote

[-] GarbageShoot@hexbear.net 9 points 3 weeks ago

I'm sure this has been done. checks Yeah, and it's the tackiest I've seen: "Conservative Dad’s Ultra Right 100% Woke-Free American Beer".

[-] BobDole@hexbear.net 7 points 3 weeks ago

Would be great if it included soy tho

[-] UlyssesT@hexbear.net 8 points 3 weeks ago

Would be great if it included soy tho

Know whose "anti soy" nutrition supplement had soy as its main ingredient? alex-supplements

[-] PointAndClique@hexbear.net 2 points 3 weeks ago

Don't quote me on this but I wouldn't be surprised if brewers added soy lecithin to stouts for creaminess/mouth feel

[-] Tomboymoder@hexbear.net 7 points 3 weeks ago

I think the dude that did the anti-woke razors and chocolate has already gotten on it.

[-] Owl@hexbear.net 6 points 3 weeks ago

Is there a way to add a tactical grip to the cans?

[-] ItalianMessiah@hexbear.net 4 points 3 weeks ago* (last edited 3 weeks ago)

I'm the old Norm, I just want normal beer!

this post was submitted on 15 Sep 2024
67 points (100.0% liked)

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